Here is what is going on...

I'm the librarian in our small town and I know it's hard for some people to accept changes (especially for children). The past librarian had candy set out on her desk for people to take and this tended to cause some hurt feelings because some kids would grab a handful and not leave any for others. Even when it was put in a jar, kids would find a way to take more than they should. Because of this, some parents asked me not to have candy anymore and I agree with those parents. For one thing, I can't afford to keep buying a big bag of candy a week. As an alternative, I now have stickers and each child may choose 1 when they check out books.

Well...you should hear the complaining! I had kids coming in demanding candy! One kid went so far as to tell me that because of me, he was going to have to go and buy his own candy now...:confused:. I told him that I was sorry, but it was our new policy not to have candy but rather have stickers for kids who checked out books. A few other kids have gotten upset also, but I'm sure they will get used to it in time. But my biggest shock was a parent that came in complaining that I was not giving out candy anymore, after all the other "more reasonable" librarian did it.:eek: I tried to explain to her that I had had complaints from other parents about hurt feelings when other kids swiped all the candy and that I decided to do stickers so the kids still got a special "treat" when they checked out books. She was pretty upset and thought those other parents were being unreasonable and "give her a break". :mad: To be honest with you all, I was pretty shocked that she would act this way and she kept going on about how disappointed her kids would be that I had no candy to give out and just shook her head and gave me a horrible look as she went out the door. :yikes: I maintained my composure and was kind but firm about my decision. After she left I just sat there dumbfounded that an adults would act this way. When did it become the library's responsibility to provide all the kids in town with candy??? And furthermore, I made this decision to help stop hurt feelings...

:( :confused: :bang:

Am I being unreasonable because I want to avoid hurt feelings in the kids (and the fighting that I've seen over the candy?)?

Just goes to show that some people think they are owed special favors. I agree with your idea to switch to stickers, but you may want to give a sticker when the child brings back a book and tells you about it. That way it is a reward, not a favor.:)

Originally posted by pqb52
I agree with your idea to switch to stickers, but you may want to give a sticker when the child brings back a book and tells you about it. That way it is a reward, not a favor.:)

I like this idea! Thanks! :hugz:

Yikes!!! Some people just go overboard, don't they? I would have been tempted to suggest that people might want to donate bags of candy out of their own pockets to the library, but that lady sounds unreasonable so she probably wouldn't have received it well anyway.

I agree with you. Kids will get used to the stickers. I can't beleive some parents would act that way towards you. So rude!

Perhaps if that "adult" wants kids to have the candy, she wouldn't mind buying it for you to have on your desk....if she's not willing to buy it, then perhaps it doesn't really mean that much to her....

I like the sticker idea - especially upon returning & giving a "review"....

Don't sweat the small stuff - and that gal is definitely small stuff!

:hugz:

Good grief! Of all things for a parent to be upset about. She could keep candy in her car and give her children a piece each time they go to the library if it's so important to her.

No, you're not being unreasonable. Try to just forget about it.

Sorry Debbie, some parents have no manners and what is even more sorry is that their children may not grow up to have them.
If the parents want their kids to have candy they can buy it.
And what if one of those kids choked on a piece of candy? You'd be the first they'd blame. Can't win. If you wanted to say anything I'd just say, new policy... health hazard, insurance costs...it is too bad I know you parents especially loved it so.:P

I like pbq52's idea.:thumb:

Debbie,

That is just such a shame that a grown woman would act in such a way! How much you wanna bet she was eating the candy? :toothy: Some people...sheesh! I think you made the most excellent decision! Stickers are great and I know if it were me, I wouldn't want the temptation of candy on the desk because I would have a hard time controlling myself!

Thanks Ladies! :grouphug:

You are all right of course, it's not worth getting worked up over. Thanks so much for helping me put this into perspective.

I'm going to just share my candy with all of you! :laugh:
:sucker: :mm: :mm: :choco:

Hold the phone with that cyber candy, I haven't put my two cents in yet!!

Why are the kids (and parents) coming to the library? Does it say "Candy Store" on the front of the building? I agree with all the above, that parent was out of line and typical of the something-for-nothing attitude I see occasionally here.

Stick to your guns, Debbie, you're doing the right thing. You're there to help them learn and choose books, not for doling out the candy. I would have gone cross-eyed at her when she walked away. :dazed:

LOVE the reward sticker idea...whatever with the candy-mom.

some people's children just should not go out in public and that lady is one of them. the gual she had to come and complain about not having candy for her kids. geez! and you're still giving out something to the kids, you haven't totally done away with the little treat. a trip to the library isn't a trip to the candy store.
around here the only thing the library gives out arebookmarks with info about upcoming events in the community. you're stickers are still neater than that.



forestdale, i would have gone crossed eyed at her while she was having her fit. :toothy:

You are definately doing the right thing, Debbie! ((((HUGS)))) to you for putting up with that spoiled brat of a mom! I hope the next time they come in she is more civil!

ITA with all of the above-- the motivation to come to the library shouldn't be for the free candy! Plus, parents like me who don't want their kids to have candy (and why do people offer hard candy to my one year old??) get put on the spot having to refuse it when offered. I like the sticker idea much better.

And as a sidenote, I can relate... for years I have kept a large glass candy jar on my desk at work. Over the years I have been amazed at how people act--- some think nothing of walking into my office and taking literally a handful and shoving it in their pocket, while others will actually complain to me about what type of candy is in the jar (as in "oh, I don't like hard candy, I was hoping you had chocolate"). :rolleyes: I've just decided that I enjoy having it there to share with people, and they can either take it and enjoy it, or they can buy their own. ;)

Hugs Debbie! You are totally doing the right thing. That woman was completely out of line.

I think stickers are a neat idea! :D

Thanks Ladies! :grouphug:

I have an upcoming meeting with all the other branch managers and we have to share how we handle difficult situations. I think I am going to use the "lady" in question as my example! :laugh: Maybe I should thank her for being such a "good example" for me to use on how to handle difficult people.:toothy:

I can't believe a parent would be complaining about their child not getting candy?!? I think as a parent I would have bigger issues to complain about.

I like that you were firm and stuck to your beliefs. If you run out of stickers, you can always start giving out bookmarks. You can get special inkpads and stamps and cut strips of construction paper into bookmarks and stamp them with holidays, seasons, anything that is fun for the children.

People can be so petty. You ought to see how crazy people can get in a doctor's office! I agree that she is not worth worrying over, and that your stickers are awesome. I never got anything extra at the library as a kid. You're an awesome librarian!! :D

Cool! Another librarian!:D

I don't blame you one bit for nixing the candy. It gets very expensive. You'd think the kids would love the stickers??:confused: Stick to your guns. They can either like it or lump it is my philosphy!:D How rude of them to comment on it in that manner.:mad:

Being able to borrow a book to read should be a reward in itself. Keep up the great job!

Hugs!!

My kids school does the candy reward thing - for the stupidest little stuff - I can't stand candy rewards - I am so glad you are able to make a stand. Don't say either that you are making a big del out of nothing - you care- this woman is a freak and will never realize that you care- to me that is a crimb- we can do nothing about it but it doesn't mean you are making a big deal out of nothing - unfortunately those of us who constantly offer ourselves up to other peoples kids as scout leaders, librarians, aides, group leaders, gifted leaders, soccer coaches get criticized for some many things and really the parents are just looking to make themselves feel better rather than appreciating the fact that we are going that extra mile for their kids. I respect your choice and I respect you!!

:grouphug: Ladies

Thanks for the encouragement, support and love.

WOW, I thought you went to the library to get BOOKS. What a suprise to read all this. A reward is to be able to check out a game also in my house. cau