What you have is never enough.

Do you believe this? Why or why not?

I am living with the aim of having it all, but what I mean by that phrase probably isn't what everyone else means.

I don't think I will ever have it all, but for me the end point isn't what's important, it's going through the various stages and processes that make things worthwhile.

But as far as having it all i.e materially, I don't think you can, as there's always something else, as long as you have someone to compare yourself to. If you have that mentality, the seaweed is always greener in sobebody else's lake.

I think it is dependent on what you mean by " all" Material items do not constitute all to me. They are simply " stuff" that can not bring lasting joy. To me, having it all means having the best health I am capable of, having healthy loving relationships with my husband, children and family, having friends who encourage and support each other, gaining in faith in my walk with God and finding peace of mind. While I do think having these things takes tremendous effort and constant work, I do think it is a goal worth striving for. But I dont think I can ever have it all. There will always be something new to learn, something new to do for my family or health. But the trip is what makes it fun.

I don't think in terms of having it all- or not enough. I settle for what makes me comfortable and forget about what the Jones are doing.

Well, we have no LR furniture right now waiting to pay off debt...
(fell apart from age)

DH has a paid off 1998 truck
We do our own cleaning/pool service/landscaping

My car I bought new almost paid off
Own 2 homes (investing)

Our washer/dryer is falling apart (11 yers old)

Our clothes are cleaned by the company we work for (uniforms)

We have zero patio furniture besides a chair we paid 3 bucks for at the thrift store.

Besides buying properties, which is the largest expense, If you visited me, you would think I was poor!:reindeer:

It's not having what you want, it's wanting what you already have. Then what you have will always be enough. :)

Yes, if you visited me you'd think we were struggling financially. We have no landscaping, the carpet needs replacing, theres a small rip in the couch that can't be fixed, the washer and dryer is at least 13 years old and needs paint cans stacked on top of the corner to run, and there isn't tons of decorations on my wall. Yet I love it. It's clean. My old furniture is paid for. I will add some landscaping later on, I'm in no hurry. We don't wear the latest fashions and it's okay. We're happy with what we do have. If all we did was sit around and always wish we had something else then I think we'd never be happy. Sure, we do want stuff. But we aren't going to be unhappy because we can't go get it.

Excellent post! There is always something that could be updated, but I am determined to be content. Calmly content and blessed with what I have, even if I have very worn out stuff. I have a lot of patience in this area.. all in good time.

We have everything we need. So in some sense we do have it all.

It's like the fact that I never tell anyone how much money we make. Half the population would say what do you do with all that money? The other half would say how can you live on that? Rich or poor it's your frame of mind that matters the most.

If you mean material items, I don't think you'll ever "have it all" because there is always something bigger and better to have. If you mean having the things you want in your life and choosing contentedness, than absolutely. I am slowly but surely getting into this frame of mind. As I look around and I look at our past and see the things and situations that got us where we are, I've realized that I am becoming happier with less. My reality means more to me now. The possibility of living debt free and unburdened excites me. That means we're giving up a lot of things we thought we needed to make our lives meaningful. Now I know that nothing materialistic is ever going to please me more than my health and my family. It probably sounds cliche I suppose. I just feel this sense of content now. I have visions of a nice small house (I really don't need all of this space) where my kids can play outside in our big (have to have big here) yard and help me tend a garden and learn about nature and living a simpler lifestyle.

I agree, if you mean "material" things then one will never have enough.

As for us one would think as they enter our home that we are totally struggling and to some extent we are but:

- We started our kitchen remodeling project BUT we have everything from the dining room in the living room, a mess in the dining room, it's cluttered, our kitchen is a mess only a few cabinets remain.

- Our living room is cluttered, while we may have a big screen TV our downstairs in in shambles.

- While we may have brandname clothing and stuff like that we bought them from the Thrift Shop, our furniture is paid for (so is the TV).

People would think "How can you live like this? Are you guys ok?" but I tell them yes, things take time and IN TIME things will be complete.

Now before if anyone would walk in, they would think, WOW this is beautiful, blah blah blah, you guys live well. BUT in all actuality we live ok, we may have nice things but we're not rich, WE SAVE to be abl to buy these things.

<b>With my long story I end with this, materials things can make one feel rich inside but only love, health, family and GOD can bring in the richest of rewards.</b>

What I have is enough for me.

I have more than I deserve and with that I am very grateful.

Originally posted by pammyboat
It's not having what you want, it's wanting what you already have.


Pammy I whole-heartedly agree with you!!!! I am satisfied with my life as t is but others seem to think it is too little. I don't need fancy vacations and new clothes every month to be happy. Having a roof over our heads, food in our bellies God in my heart and my family is all I need.

What you have is never enough.

Do you believe this? Why or why not?

^^^
I agree...
Most people my age would faint with their feet in the air If they were to become frugal or live more simply....
Most of the school mums are living beyond their means, trying to keep up with the beckhams etc....
My DD told me last week that several girls from her class were going to a 'pamper party'....Every time there is a childs birthday, they party has to be bigger and better than the last one!

I want to be content and turn 30 with a bank balance and satisfaction, not turn 30 with Thousands in debt and sinking under.....

Yes. I've seen it in dh. As soon as there's money, he wants to spend it. When there's no money, he blames me. He's gradually growing out of this, but the reality is when he has money, there's no end to the things he'd like to buy.

I can be just as bad, but reign myself in. Our mortgage is due to be paid out this year. We have a list of things we want to buy on the fridge. I am getting everything out in the open so we can priortize expenses and categorize them into needs vs. wants. Also so that the ones that will save us money get bumped to the top of the list. While the ones that will cost us to run get bumped to the bottom of the list, or off it altogether.

Jean

"He who is unhappy with what he has, and what he will never have, will never be content with what he really needs" charlene

A family friend once said to me in conversation that, "You are too content".....why yes I am I appreciate everyone and everything I have in my life.

leezza

A family friend once said to me in conversation that, "You are too content".....why yes I am I appreciate everyone and everything I have in my life.

leezza
It's nice to be that way, works for me. :thumb:

I think it depends on what you consider "all" -- if you live to have a gorgeous body, a fantastic career, a brilliant university degree, a well-cared for home, a nurtured family and a healthy religious life, well... you'll die. :P I think you have to pick the right things to live for. Some people decide not to have children, and instead live for their careers. Some people choose to live for their families and stay at home to take care of their children. Some people choose to live for their religions, and instead forgo the desire for posessions. Some people choose to live for their health and instead give up their enjoyment of all foods and "partying" (though this is certainly not a bad thing). It's not selfish or greedy to give up one thing if you feel your true cause is more important (i.e. quitting work to take care of the twins, or not having the twins to pursue your dream career). However, trying to have it all, yes, you will have nothing, because there is too much.

We are in the process of selling our home, and I have done so much decluttering in the past few years that our realtor asked me to put out a few more things so that things wouldn't look quite so barren. Now that's a switch!

"We are in the process of selling our home, and I have done so much decluttering in the past few years that our realtor asked me to put out a few more things so that things wouldn't look quite so barren."


I'll bet the realtor never had to say that before!

I read that and it really floored me. If you take it in the concept of material goods, no, you will never have it all. Your computer will never be top of the line because you'll only have it for two months and a new one will come out. Your television will never be the biggest because in six weeks a bigger one will come out. Your food will never be the best because it will rot and go bad. Your home will never be the biggest because your neighbor is just going to build a backyard pool and a fifth story.

If you want to have it all (material) then no, you'll never have enough.

Naderbug, I couldn't have said it any better that you have, something or someone will always have more and better.

Monner 1

Naderbug, I couldn't have said it any better that you have, something or someone will always have more and better.

Agreed, very well out Naderbug! The frequency with which DH brings home yet a newer version of laptop from work is scary!

Materially we can never have it all. Although, about 10 years ago I sure gave it a good try - dh will attest to that fact! I think if you live for having it all and you're an "average" working American, you're going to end up broke and in debt. Personally, been there, done that. Thankfully, I've become a saver and stopped being a spender. I've found it to be a much more satisfying life to be content with what I have and it keeps down on the clutter in my house.

It's not having what you want, it's wanting what you already have. Then what you have will always be enough.


I am happy,content & thankful for what I have, I totally agree with Pammy!!

It's not alot, but it's mine & paid for!!!:cheer4:

Like Chatterweb, I have no living room furniture either. (I thought I was the only one)

I could care less about our material things, so long as we are healthy.

There are many things I want, but i will never have it all, but looking forward to try to achieve my "all" makes it all worth it.

I agree...for me, this is a year of NOT "acquiring". Stuff = time/money (and for me, it's all really NOT worth my time or my money usually) and you really can't take it with you.

I consider myself to be quite frugal - for ex., I have not bought a new pair of shoes in 3 yrs. However, I can see as frugal as I am that it is still easy to piddle money away if you are not aware.

I am looking forward to the new year and hoping to have lots more no spend days. I also choose to live very simply and I find as I get older, that they things that were important to me when I was younger are not so important now. I love having free time to do what I want. I love the simple frugal life..it suits me best

There was a time in my life when I thought my world would be complete when I had a proper dining room suite. Boy, was I naive.

As I've grown older and my husband's career and paycheck have flourished, I'm finding that all those things I used to covet have very little meaning. The buffet looks pretty with it's display of wedding china, but everytime I look at it, all I can think it "What a waste to have a cabinet full of china we never use." The expensive couch I had to have is stained and faded, and the tables are scratched from my young son's hot wheels. In the garage, the luxury car has lost it's gleam.

It was very silly of me to think "things" would somehow be fulfilling. So, now I find myself divesting of all these beautiful and expensive items, and my life is no less rich. Oh, that I could save my daughter from said folly, but I think it's a lesson time will slowly teach her as it did me.

Alot of us may be wanting more. Or we see what we think we need to have to make us feel secure . Even if its only small or inexspensive items.
The t.v. and the stores dont help with all the ads. lol

Default
Like Chatterweb, I have no living room furniture either. (I thought I was the only one)

I could care less about our material things, so long as we are healthy.

There are many things I want, but i will never have it all, but looking forward to try to achieve my "all" makes it all worth it.

I thought I was the only one too!!!
I also need new clothes.
My work gives me free laundered uniforms, and I am wearing the same falling apart clothes from 2 years ago.

I am just interested in saving money for retirement, to hell with the small stuff like heating, and water and furniture, let alone new digs!:pblow:

Money will give you more security than a household full of "junk" that you will just have to declutter at some point.

Of course, there is a point where hoarding anything excessively becomes "greed", no matter what it is (even money). Once we have enough, we should be all willing to share with others.

However, I think America in general is quite humerous because the majority of people aspire to accumulating things, only to rack up debts and have to scramble later on in life to somehow pay it all off. Guaranteed, there are those few who have debts because of medical reasons or some kind of catastrophe, but I believe in general that for most, that is just not the case.

I have stopped "acquiring" before it got out of hand. Now, we are working on paying off debt, ridding of stuff that is not necessary, and I don't plan on turning back. And God-willing, we will not end up bankrupt someday due to medical issues - which is a crying shame for this country (and should never have to happen to anyone). But that's a whole different posting in itself.

I think that "poor" is mostly an attitude. There is probably many a millionaire out there that feels poor.

If having it all is in relation to material things, then no, I don't think a person could ever be satisfied. It seems the minute ya buy something and walk out hte door, a newer model hits the street. I think part of growing up is realizing that things never satisfy, never have, never will. We have some nice things, but I grew up with nothing and so its hard to look at having posessions as being a success. Plus, I've seen too many people ruined by trying to keep up with the jones', and they never realize that the jones' and in hock up to their ears for what they have and fight over the bills and struggle to pay for what they have. We're pretty much cash based and if we don't have the money then we wait till we do. That helps curb the wants pretty often.

This was beautiful. Just quoting it so that it can be read again!

There was a time in my life when I thought my world would be complete when I had a proper dining room suite. Boy, was I naive.

As I've grown older and my husband's career and paycheck have flourished, I'm finding that all those things I used to covet have very little meaning. The buffet looks pretty with it's display of wedding china, but everytime I look at it, all I can think it "What a waste to have a cabinet full of china we never use." The expensive couch I had to have is stained and faded, and the tables are scratched from my young son's hot wheels. In the garage, the luxury car has lost it's gleam.

It was very silly of me to think "things" would somehow be fulfilling. So, now I find myself divesting of all these beautiful and expensive items, and my life is no less rich. Oh, that I could save my daughter from said folly, but I think it's a lesson time will slowly teach her as it did me.

We moved back to the south from Las Vegas. There money rules. Here in the mountains of Virginia things are slow moving and no one cares whether you have a new car or a livingroom suite. Dont have either of thoses.

I have gotten to the point when my mom asks me what I would like for Christmas it is unders(panties). I need nothing else. I have learned by being frugal that you actually have what you need. Just rearranging and making something out of something else is quite fun. And it raises your spirits when you have found that you saved money by using the ole' noodle.

My dh and I have our health. We have our son, dil and gd and they are healthy. We manage to take in kittens and cats that are throwaways and make sure that they are healthy. We have enough to eat and have enough to share with others. "IF You Live For Having It All?" We have it all. Our health is the most important thing to have.

So I have a question. Why aren't you using the china? We use ours whenever I feel like making a special dinner...at least once a month. In winter, more often. One of our frugal luxuries is a fancy set table every week...usually the last workday of the week. To ease DH into the weekend.

I also viewed it as a time to teach the children proper table manners. If the crystal broke...so what. I replaced it with cheap stuff from Walmart. The only china that's ever broken was my fault! Though I have 2 daughters who refuse to wash it because they're afraid of breaking it! But hey, the stuff is meant to be used!

We actually prefer the silverware...it has nicer thicker handles and a better balance than the cheap stuff. Easier to cut with the knives...especially if you have arthritic hands. And it's better for silverware to be used regularly...less polishing needed.

Crumb, if I had to keep it in a $2000 china cabinet (or more) for years without using it, I'd be ticked off too! Get it out and use it girl!

Jean

We have everything we need. So in some sense we do have it all.

It's like the fact that I never tell anyone how much money we make. Half the population would say what do you do with all that money? The other half would say how can you live on that? Rich or poor it's your frame of mind that matters the most.

Excellent. Your frame of mind is what makes you happy or sad with your situation. Me - we have a 30 year old cargo couch with its second set of cushions, hubby drives 12 year old car, I drive a 7 year old car, kids have to work to help with college, etc etc

and yet - all through high school we were the hang out house for my kids 20 closest friends even though we did not have cable or video games or highspeed internet.

If you look around the house and see old carpet/tattered furniture you will be sad; if you look around the house and see a happy home filled with love you will be happy. Perception is reality!

I really love that attitude! Good for you. More people should be like that.;)