I'd love to get this thread up and running again. I have a 10 month old that I am attachment parenting (her choice, not mine from the start!) I'd love to hear from some others who breastfeed/fed beyond a couple of months, who co-sleep, etc. This is a real issue for me budget-wise because I cannot work while she is so dependant on me. If anybody has any tips, I'd love them.

my daughter is 3yrs old & still very very attached. she also sleeps with me (mostly because my hubby works 3rd shift). i like knowing the fact that she is dependent on me, but sometimes it drives me crazy!!!!!!! i only breastfed her until she was 5mths old.

We're past that stage now, but my younger was like that. Like you, I hadn't intended to AP - mostly because I wasn't particularly familiar with it - but that little girl DEMANDED it! We co-bedded for about 18 months, nursed for 3 years and she still (just turned 5) has to cuddle with me or sit on my lap every day. She is a very affectionate child and warms my heart in a way no one else ever has.

I was greatly helped by books by William Sears, particularly ones in which he discusses the 'high needs child.' Most of his books are available at libraries. Come to think of it, I read those books a lot in the early months; I'm not sure how much you'd get from them at this stage. Reading them helped me to realize that I wasn't alone; it was okay to get frustrated sometimes; and that I wasn't 'making' her be dependent upon me (as my dh says to this day :rolleyes: ).

When she was still nursing at 14 months, I attended a LLL meeting - only one mind you, but I had a bad experience. The handful of mothers at this particular group had very permissive parenting styles. 'Nuff said.

This is a good time for you to think about what boundaries you want to place on nursing as she gets older. A 12-month old probably no longer needs you to drop the groceries and go nurse in the restroom (unless she's gotten hurt or something). I was never comfortable with stories of other children lifting their mom's shirts in public, so I set that as a limit. Around 10 months, my dd developed the word 'ba-ba' for nursing. I was able to use that for a long time to set limits. "Not now honey; you can have ba-ba when we get home." By about 2.5 she was talking well and we just called it nursing. After about 18 months we didn't nurse in public and when we did nurse, she had to lie quietly on my lap - or next to me on the bed - and not climb all over. Some moms are fine with climbing; I wasn't. So think about what you'll want to do, so that you can gently set those limits with her.

I have NEVER regretted parenting her the way I did.

I also did a lot of things in order to be home. I'm an RN, but I ran my own in-home daycare for 1.5yrs - for her sake basically. I didn't care much for it; but it was tolerable and it was worth it.

For budget ideas and SAHM ideas and supplemental income ideas, I would suggest you post to those areas on these forums. There are a ton of people with a wealth of great ideas. :)

Andrea, I've totally been where you are. My DD had medical problems from day one, and I had no intention of attchment parenting her (frankly, I had no idea what it was and scorned my sister for co-sleeping.) However, I learned after a few days at home that if I didn't hold her while she was sleeping, neither of us was going to get any sleep. DH and I took turns sleeping the first few nights, then we realized it was insane. She knew what she needed. As it turned out, she was a lot better off with us holding her because of those medical problems- she was in pain sleeping any other way.

She still co-sleeps, which isn't something I share often, because most people don't get it. She does have her own bed that is in our room. (She will be moving into her own room once we get the electrician in to switch out the outlets in our 110 year old house.)

I breast fed her exclusively till she was about 6.5 months old, pumping at work and in the car (hands free, obviously) on the way home from my part-time evening job. It was a huge hassle, and luckily she stopped taking the bottle at about 10 months. We were very cautious about introducing foods, and I made all of her food. I think I bought a total of 4 jars of organic baby food (the stuff you aren't supposed to make at home on your own until they are older, like peas) but we never finished a single jar- I ended up taking two of them to a co-worker.

She was breast fed until she was two, which was my goal as it is the recommendation of the WHO and the (smarter than the AAP in this instance) Canadian academy of pediatrics. She basically weaned herself about two weeks before her 2nd birthday.

We carried her all over the place in a sling for a long time- people in my town still say "was that your husband out with the baby in the lsing every day?" She loved to be outside and he would take her for sling-walks at all hours of the day and night.

She is still a very attached kid, but she is pretty confident and doesn't cry easily. She knows we are here for her and will help her with what she needs, but will almost always try something on her own before asking for help. She is precocious and funny and although I had no idea what attachment parenting was when she was born, I wouldn't change much about the way we've done things. (We do have an Amby baby hammock now which we didn't get until she was a bigger girl, so if we have another child, that is where they will sleep from the start- it was the only place she would sleep as a baby other than us holding her, and she would have stayed in it until at least now except she started rolling over at 6.5 weeks and that made me nervous.)

Anyway, I know where you are at.

As for working, is your husband's work schedule predictable enough that he could watch her while you are working just a few hours a night a few nights a week? I got a 15 minutes break and I pumped then, and as I mentioned before, also in the car on the way home, and that was just enough for one bottle while I was gone. (Let's just say I had pumping issues....)

Also, if you aren't making your own baby food, it is SO easy and so inexpensive. I would buy a bunch of fruit on Sunday night, then bring it home and process it all- steaming, peeling, then grinding, mixing flavors, pouring into ice cube trays, and freezing. Once frozen, I would pop them out and put them into freezer bags and label. I made enough to last one to two weeks, and she had a very easy transition to table foods because the texture wasn't nearly so liquid as the jarred stuff.

Both of you are so helpful! It's great just to read what other moms have to say. I've gone to AP specific sites before, but it seems like most of those moms had planned to parent this way, so both of your stories are particularly helpful.

I haven't owned any of Dr. Sears' books, but I love his website, AskDrSears.com. Finding out about high needs babies was a true godsend. Everybody else in the family thinks I'm crazy. "All babies are high needs." they say. But WE know!

I have a 15 year old son who was a completely different baby, (I know they all are, but until you have your second kid you don't get this) and so long ago that it was almost like being a 1st time mom again. I had wanted to BF my son, Quinn, but he was ill and in the hospital for a couple of weeks, and I just never learned how to do it. I did bump for him for 6 months. Anyway, I was determined to BF Atha and she took to it like a champ. Also, the Germans are great coaches. They basically position that baby on your boob for you. Very hands-on. Anyway, she would never take a bottle from then on, and still won't. I have been trying to get her to take one just so.. so she will. Just in case. But nope. Also, she's been extremely resistant to solids. She hates jarred baby food. Maybe I'll start making my own. Wouldn't hurt to try!

BTW- do either of you (or anybody else) have any tips on alternative uses for baby rice cereal? The kind you mix with milk? I'm on WIC so it's free, but she won't eat it. My frugal little heart just breaks when I return a WIC check unused!

My DH is in the Army and his schedule frankly sucks. During the holidays he's been working 24 hours on, 24 hours off. We never know when he'll be home. So I can't work around his schedule. However, I can do in home daycare. I've been loathing the thought of it because I feel like I've got enough to deal with with just my daughter, but it may be a good idea to try it, just for awhile.

Okay, thanks again ladies! Anybody else have a story to tell?

Quick note - I'm at work:

She doesn't need solid/baby food yet. At that age, I offered what we were eating, but cooked until soft and cut into small pieces. Casserole was perfect. More details later, if you want 'em.

For the rice cereal - this breaks the WIC rules, but I used to get it from the voucher and then give it to a needy friend or turn it into a food bank. No ideas for using the vile stuff tho! Bleh!

Yeah, I've been giving the cereal to Hurricane Relief.

And that's exactly what I've been doing with her for solid food. I put some of what we're having on her high chair tray, take off her shirt and let her go to town. SOME of it winds up in her tummy. I read somewhere that she should be getting 50% of her nutrition from solids by now... but then I should know not to trust everything I read. She's thriving, is in the 90+ percentile for her age in height and weight. I shouldn't be a worrywart. That's what moms do, tho.

Thanks again! Did I mention that this has been so.ooooo helpful?

Jarred baby food is obviously not a necessity- making everyone think their baby needs it is a corporate marketing ploy. After all, it has only existed in the last 100 years or less.

Here is a site that I relied upon VERY heavily when DD was smaller. I especially loved the solid foods chart- I printed it up and posted it on the fridge and kept notes on it.

http://www.wholesomebabyfood.com/

And here is a great resource that I recommend to everyone I can:

http://www.kellymom.com/

I just happened on this thread. I too kinda "fell" into AP parenting, but mostly out of necessity than desire or knowledge of what I was doing! We had been told we would never get pg naturally, so when the two lines showed up on the test for DD, we were thrilled and shocked. We also knew we were going to have to budget very wisely!

I made my own CD's when I was pg, and was determined to breastfeed, as the two things I knew we couldn't afford were disposables and formula!

DD ended up nursing until she was 3.5 yrs old, and I nursed her through my pg with DS1 (gotta proove the Drs wrong again :-D ). DS1 I weaned when he was 22 mos, and got pg a month later with DS2.

DS2 is now almost 7 mos, still nurses exclusively (except for the odd tiny taste of table food, which he pushes out immediately anyways). Both boys co-slept, DD is a little furnace who to this day I can't sleep with! LOL! In fact most evenings DH still sleeps with DS1, and I sleep with DS2. It just makes life easier and more restful for all.

Keep doin' what you're doin' It's so special to spend the time with babies. They grow up so fast, and I'm wishing this little guy would just slow down some, as he's our last.. and already in 18mos clothes!!!

Cindy :)

what we used to do with the dry baby cereal is this...buy regular applesauce & mix it with the cereal...you can also add a little milk to it. our kids never really cared for the jarred baby food, so we just mushed up whatever the rest of us were having for our meals and the babies were happy with that...sometimes we had to add a little water to reach desired consistency........as for nursing...I am kicking myself for not sticking with it for my older 5 children, but I definitely saw it through with the younger 4 and plan to again with the new baby. for the younger 4, i nursed them for 10 months.....as for co sleeping, that is something that we have always done. each child has been different...some of them want their own bed when they were 2, then we still have a 7 & 9 yr old that will sneak into our room with their sleeping bags & sleep on our floor:D ...our baby, who is 2 still sleeps with us. I have heard it said that the best investment that a couple could make is a king size bed..now I can see why:D

Ds is welcome to sleep in my bed if he needs to, but I do encourage him to sleep in his own bed, he's 5. I didn't use much jarred baby food either, I just fed real food and mashed to the correct consistency for him. He really enjoyed avacado. You can just cut it in half, pop out the nut, and spoon it out. I only made it 7 days breastfeeding, but if I ever have another I will definately do it again. I'd like to try cloth diapers as well.
I'm not sure if how I parent is really AP or not, I just do as we've always done with the babies in our family: Hold them if they want to be held, feed them if they are hungry, talk to them and play with them if they are alert, and let them sleep in our arms, in our beds, or close by in a crib or bassinet.
Each one of my neices and nephews, and my son, were distictly different people from day one. I think it's important to learn about who our children are and work with them, instead of finding ways to make them who we think they should be.

I think one mommy mentioned it before, but by the time my babies were about the age of yours, i basically blended up (in the blender with formula/juice/water) whatever the family was eating for lunch/dinner for the baby to eat.
Jarred applesauce (the unsweetened kind) is exactly like the baby apples except cheaper :-D
I was on WIC with my kids as well, and they always supplied an abundance of cereal as well, so to remedy the situation, EVERYTHING the baby ate had atleast a spoon of cereal in it. My babies prefered the oatmeal cereal to the rice. It went in fruits AND veggies...which was nice since homemade green bean baby food tends to be a bit on the juice side
I loved making baby food, it was soooo cheap and super easy to make. I often cheated and used canned veggies since they were already "cooked" and easy to mash in the blender, but you can use fresh veggies/fruit too as long as they are cooked until soft ;-)

Just my 2 cents on the subject :D

Opps, 2 more cents to add on the subject :cool:

I just started to use cloth diapers. I bought them for the new baby (due in july) but i am currently using them on my un potty trained 3 yr old :bang: and she (and me) LOVES them. They are so soft and comfy. Any how, i found a gal who makes them to sell online. Her website is www.cutest-cloth-diapers.com (if that is not right you can google search Little lambs and find her site) she sells AIO (all in ones) they are a bit pricey at first, but one size fits all and last forever
I also started to use cloth baby wipes...she likes those so much better than the disposable wipes
You can use those baby wash clothes or order hemp ones. A solution i use is 2 cups of distilled water, 2 tbsp of olive oil, and 2 tbsp of baby wash or shampoo. Mix well and make sure the sudsies are gone. I poured mine into an old baby shampo container and squirt the solution onto the wipe when i need to wipe her bottom ;-)

I just did whatever my babies needed. My first child nursed for 1 yr and slept in her own room from the day I brought her home from the hospital. My second only nursed for 3 mths but he also slept on his own. The third and fourth(identical twins) ended up sleeping with me for 3 yrs and I nursed them for 3 yrs too. I tried putting them in their own room to start with but found it too difficult to take them to the frontroom to nurse them 2x/night. They always nursed at the same time so the rocking chair in their room just didn't work, one night I brought them into bed with me. I would stuff pillows under the fitted sheet on each side of the bed then I would sleep in the middle with one on each side. The fifth is 2-1/2 yrs and she has slept with us from day one, she is also still nursing. After the twins and Emily turned 1-1/2 yr I wouldn't nurse in public anymore, except when we went for shots they always nursed then. Right now I'm finding that Emily will nurse during the day only if she is bored, so I am cutting out daytime feedings, but will nurse at bedtime until she doesn't need it.
I ended up getting 4 boxes of rice cereal from a friend and Emily wouldn't eat it so I started mixing some into our pancake batter. It stretched the batter a little farther.