I'm confused. someone here said she "scorned her sister for co-sleeping". I'm curious as to why you would do that? Would anyone like to be scorned for using a crib and having their baby in a separate room? Probably not, but sharing a space with your baby is the biological norm- NOT putting them far away and having to wake up and get them during the night.

I think it's easy to react to a choice without understanding it- and sadly, that's what has happened with childrearing. we had this burst of marketing in the Baby Boom and the entire milieu of parenting changed- babies were pushed to become separate for all classes- not just the upper classes with their nannies, baby nurses (yes, they really did nurse, as in breastfeed the wealthy babies, often causing the death of their own)- Like it or not, we are animals and we can look to the other animals for clues about what our species expects biologically and emotionally.

hmm.. interesting thought here. When does a child stop co-sleeping?

Well, it was me that said it, and I think it is extremely important to see this in context:

" I had no intention of attchment parenting her (frankly, I had no idea what it was and scorned my sister for co-sleeping.) However, I learned after a few days at home that if I didn't hold her while she was sleeping, neither of us was going to get any sleep. DH and I took turns sleeping the first few nights, then we realized it was insane. She knew what she needed. As it turned out, she was a lot better off with us holding her because of those medical problems- she was in pain sleeping any other way.

She still co-sleeps, "


I don't really have anything else to say about it.

I don't have children Kimberly, but I didn't take your post out of context. I understood exactly what you meant. Anyone that knows you, knows you are a terrific mom. :hugz:

Kimberly, :hugz:

I don't practice co-sleeping either. The kids just want to be left alone when they sleep after around 3-6 mos of age. You so much as breathe next to them and they wake up. LOL so we learned that for our family it doesn't work. Now and then, they'll sleep in the living room with daddy, all piled up on the lazy boy or the couch. But that is out of the ordinary for us. All five of us would rather be left to ourselves for sleep. For the families it does work for I have only heard good things, so that's great.

I understand exactly what you meant in your reply quote there :) . I didn't know a thing about co-sleeping before I had ds1, had no intention of having a family bed, I had thought it was strange. Then after each child was born, we found the need to hold them in their sleep too. My kids didn't have any health issues, but they slept soo much better when we did hold them. LOL, till they decided "enough of that!" and started sleeping better on their own.

I was still wondering... after my nap (alone) when does a child stop co-sleeping? I wonder this because my husband's dd has one of her children- middle child- sleep in her bed. The infant and 8 year old are 'far' away. :confused:

So, I thought it weird that it was that way. Seems the middle child got used to sleeping in bed with mommy and daddy and now won't budge to his own room.

My babies slept with me as long s they nursed. Then they moved to their own beds, but now the 2 and 3 year old are back. Ds, now 13, did the same thing. He was ready for his own bed at age 5.

And that's all I have to say.

I suppose it all depends on the family and the child. I have seen my BIL in his parents bed as late as 13-14-15 when he was ill. I thought it was incredibly strange. But it worked for him and his parents didn't seem bothered by it.

I don't see that age co-sleeping being a comfortable solution for our family, but i guess if it works for other families...

Well, I have a niece who sleeps with her parents every night. I don't find it strange. She is 6 now. She had alot of health problems when she was an infant/toddler. When she spends the night with us, I sleep with her in the recliner. I feel safer this way as I can feel her breathing. I would never forgive myself if I had her sleep by herself and something should happen. JMO

I agree- I think it is a family specific thing, and the circumstance make all the difference. For instance, if we didn't have the circumstances we had (dd with significant reflux, in pain when she was laid down, etc) we probably wouldn't have co-slept on a regular basis. And now it is just a matter of needing to get the electrician in to redo her outlets. She never goes near them, but until all the outlets in her room are updated so we can put new outlet guards in them, she stays in our room. End of story. Every family has different circumstances.

Under "normal" circumstances, I wouldn't feel too comfortable co-sleeping on a nightly basis with a child who is getting to be school-aged. But that is just MY opinion.

With my first, I did not even think of having her sleep in the same bed as me... My parents had warned me, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH... KWIM???? When I had my second, we were moving, changing jobs, and total topsy turvey.... It was more convienent for me to co sleep with my son... But he was in his crib, because he wanted it, at about three months... Now with ds#2, for some reason he slept with me until he was five... Then I had to make room for the new one DD #2, and now she is still sleeping with me.. For me it just became more natural to have the kids next to me in bed... I am hoping though that she will go to her own bed soon.. I still get the occasional kid who wants to sleep in our bed, usually when DH is at work.... But it wasn't too bad.... It got a lot better once we got a Cal King...:D I truely think it is a total personal choice... Now with my dsis, she is having issues of all three of her boys trying to sleep with her... Tonight, she has chosen to make them start sleeping in their own beds (just the two older ones they are 4 and 2)..... Good luck to her.:toothy:

Well I am the sister that Kimberly "scorned" for co-sleeping. I had no problems with her having opinions that were not the same as mine. I believe that every family should do what is right for them and that no one else should judge them for their opions.

For the record she did not make me feel as if I was doing something wrong. I just understood that she did not have childeren of her own yet and that for people without kids it could be difficult to understand why you may even consider cosleeping. And my reasons for cosleeping were different from others -- My bedroom is on the first floor on the opposite side of the house as the stairs to the second floor and I did not feel comfortable having the kids so far away when they were under 2 1/2 or so.

My daughter will be five in a week and we still co-sleep. I tried having her sleep in her own room, but then we moved into this apartment- it's noisey and a bit scary, even for me. We're both happier this way. When she's ready her bed is in her room waiting for her

We had co sleepers. My kids would wake up in the night and get in bed with us. They are 18 and 20 years old now. And I am happy to report as normal as they can be. Completely unaffected.

When did it stop? When my bed wettting daughter would get in bed with me and wet my bed. Imagine getting a little chilly in the night, rolling into a warm spot and then, it occurs to you what exactly the warm spot is! What a way to wake up!

Or how about this one. Your bed wetting daughter gets in with her sibling wets her bed and now you have 4 people sleeping in a full sized bed. The next day we had 3 cranky people that did not get enough sleep. The exception was the bed wetter who by that time was done with bed wetting and slept through the rest of the night like a rock.