View Full Version : I am so angry


mmy2grls
12-11-2007, 09:40 PM
First of all I love my kids more than anything and I make sure I make enough money to pay rent, bills and everything my kids could want or need. I hardly ever recieve child support so I basically do everything on my own. I could care less about child support . My exboyfriend came up this weekend to visit my little one, he hasn't paid child support in who knows how long. Here I am going without sleep and working hard to make sure everything is paid and give my girls a Christmas like I want them to have. My ex was bragging about spending money on eating out at fancy restaurants, etc. It makes me so angry that he can't be bothered to pay child support but he has the nerve to brag about spending money in my face.

I called today to see if he could get a show cause hearing for being behind in child support. I was planning on making Christmas dinner for my family and my ex was trying to invite himself over, I told him it would be $100 a plate in cash upfront for him :)

yonksgirl
12-11-2007, 10:14 PM
I know what you mean! There is a warrent out for my EXbf's arrest! He owes me $6,500! Don't worry your kids will know who is providing for them. My 7 year old knows with out me telling her! She tells me she feels safe with me. I am so sorry you have to go threw this, just know you are not alone!

monkeymia
12-11-2007, 11:01 PM
Just wanted to give you a hug.

Your DDs will have a lot of respect for you as they see you as a hard worker and a wonderful parent, unlike ex-BF.

nodmicks
12-11-2007, 11:15 PM
Wow I'm so sorry. You are to be commended so highly I can't even say for what you do for your kids. I hope court forces him to pay. Want to come live in WI where they toss deadbeat non payers in jail if they aren't working or paying for so long? I have a friends whos ex hubby decided he no longer had to work or pay and he got 30 days in the clink. Kind of cut into his social life so he found in his heart to work and pay.

mmy2grls
12-12-2007, 08:38 AM
Thanks

I was so annoyed with him hearing him brag when I have to work so hard to provide for my children. He has no shame.

nodmicks
12-12-2007, 08:39 AM
Thanks

I was so annoyed with him hearing him brag when I have to work so hard to provide for my children. He has no shame.


Oh I'd be mad too!!!

pip
12-12-2007, 09:47 AM
What is wrong with some people? Good for you for being such a good mama!

kaykwilts
12-12-2007, 10:07 AM
How can he eat out at fancy restaurants when he knows his child could use the money? This man has no conscience.

boogiemum
12-12-2007, 11:44 AM
oh, I know the feeling- my SD's mother hasn't paid support in a year - we are currently going through the court system over it- and she has been taking vacations, getting tattoos and all kinds of frivolous spending. it's nice to know she is enjoying her daughter's money.

KJayEsq
12-12-2007, 12:14 PM
Is he employed? I don't practice family law, but I believe (at least in California) you can attach his wages and then child support is automatically paid...both what he owes each month plus what is in arrears. Just a thought. :fence:

yonksgirl
12-12-2007, 12:33 PM
Is he employed? I don't practice family law, but I believe (at least in California) you can attach his wages and then child support is automatically paid...both what he owes each month plus what is in arrears. Just a thought. :fence:

That is what I have going on, but if he is not working then it does not work. My ex likes to get fired all the time and mooch off his family!

mmy2grls
12-12-2007, 12:51 PM
That is what I have going on, but if he is not working then it does not work. My ex likes to get fired all the time and mooch off his family!

I almost think we're talking about the same man here lol


He flat out told me he was not going to pay child support anymore. He said he needed to do things for himself lol, he mooches off his family, too cheap to buy his own car or get his own place. This is the guy that wouldn't help buy anything for my baby when she was born but hired a lawyer to sue me for custody and child support. Of course I have custody but he was so mad that he didn't get child support! lol

Jskell911
12-12-2007, 01:53 PM
What is wrong with these men!!!??? I do not blame you one bit for being so angry!

My ex live is NV and couldn't even be bothered to call his son, never mind fork over any cash. When he WAS paying (all of one year in 8) he alwasy threw it in my face. Like he was giving me the world (yeah right 80 bucks a week). I just reminded him that his 80 bucks paid exactly one half of his son's medical insurance and one half of daycare! No extras here......

If you can go after him for it then yeah go for it. But I also understand there are so many cases (like mine) where it just isn't worth it.... The legal fees because he lives out of state, and the fact that you can;t get blood from a stone.

Good luck to you and good job standing up for your DD. Sometimes the satisfaction of knowing that you are doing right by your children, well it's priceless isn't it?

Daisygirl
12-17-2007, 07:23 AM
I have been in the same situations. My EXH likes to mooch off his family as well, so I emailed his dad, who was horrified to discover he had not been paying support. His dad is in the process of catching him up and he is making the current payments for the time being. Just an idea, because my EXH's dad threatened to cut the purse strings if he did not do right by his children.

Amazing how many men there are running around unable or unwilling to keep a job and support their children while they buy all sorts of fancy electronics. At last cound, in the past 6 months my EXH has purchased a large flat screen HDTV, 2 laptops and a desktop (what, is he going to hack into the Pentagon or the National Treasury!?!), and a Bluetooth, as well as a 2005 Grand Am. Makes me so MAD!

Good luck, honey. It took me nearly two years to get this stuff straightened out.

MarshHen
12-17-2007, 01:48 PM
I have a neice who went through this with her Ex Brian. She is the mother to our little neice Eryana who passed away this past April. After Eryana passed, Brian stopped paying child support for Anthony who is 5 yrs. old. He told Erin that he just couldn't afford to pay her anymore for Anthony, and now that she is able to work, she should be able to pay her bills without his money. Well, I paid for a lawyer and he almost lost his driver's license. Here in Georgia, you loose your license if you don't pay your court ordered child support. Brian drives the big rigs for a living, only job he has ever done and he makes good money, so he changed his mind really quick, LOL. He's caught up now and doesn't miss a payment. He actually gave Erin an extra $200 this month to help pay for Anthony to have a nice Christmas. He's still a jerk in my book though for even trying to get away with not paying in the first place. He would have done it too if it hadn't been me giving her money for a lawyer. Little jerk thought I would dummy up and just help with her bills and food, and I did until she got on her feet, but this ole' gal wasn't gonna let @@@hole do her like that and get away with it. He's scared of me now, and I love it!

MOMMYDEAREST
12-17-2007, 07:03 PM
Good for you.......I would of charged him $1,000 a plate...so it sounds cheaper @ your house rather here....lol

FrugalMomof3
12-17-2007, 07:17 PM
Wow I am sooo sorry you are going through this, there is a legal aid program where you wouldnt have to pay for your own lawyer should you fit within the income guidelines, I would sue his as@ big time for all the money he owes AND has to pay till the child(ren) turn of age.

I think it's just a shame that men think they are "all that" in bed, make a child and basically say "You deal with it on your own". I just hope when the time comes "God willing" that i wont have to go through this, shoot I am thinking I would even give him a break instead of $578 a month for my DD I would agree on $450, that's enough to get the things she wants and needs.

Sorry, didnt mean to take over your post, I am sorry.

bumplett
12-17-2007, 07:24 PM
yes, in Ga you can loose your license, but just think of all the a**holes that don't care and drive anyway!!

Not having a license doesn't seem to help, it needs to be a stronger punishment -

$100/plate is FUNNY! Good for you!!

mmy2grls
12-17-2007, 07:59 PM
I can't believe I can get any madder at him. Last week he told me that he did indeed pay child support this month so believing him I took the money I had saved for my kids presents and paid off the rest of my bills.

I called the child support place to see when i'll be recieving this payment and found out he did not pay this month!!!

I can't afford to buy my kids presents. They will be getting presents from other people. I had a talk with my oldest and told her I couldn't buy presents before Christmas and she was cool with that, she can wait.

My ex calls this morning bragging about shopping for his family and such so I said something about him lying and he's still lying about making a payment.

It makes me so mad that if I denied visitation I would be in major trouble but nothing is happening to him even though he isn't paying. I called the friend of the court and nothing is being done.

He's planning on visiting for a couple days at Christmas, he's going to be surprised when I tell him he is not staying overnight in my house, he can take some of that money he's not paying and go get a room.

Daisygirl
12-20-2007, 07:01 AM
What a ditr bag scumbucket! I hate men like this. I am so angry FOR you!!!!

Darn tootin' he isn't staying at your house, heck, don't even let him use your toilet!

sueh
12-20-2007, 09:47 AM
My Ex is like that too. He always says that I am soaking him for childsupport. He thinks he is doing me a favor or something.
He always seems to have enough $$ to buy large ticket items or go out to eat at nice resteraunts.
What the heck is wrong with people?

mommy4ever
12-20-2007, 09:58 AM
That is so wrong.

I would look at getting wages garnished, speak to the grandparents, siblings. Let them know what is going on. He is morally and financially obligated to support his kids. He's just so wrong.

karone
12-20-2007, 07:26 PM
ug, know what ur going through. after i get contacts for me im going to save for a lawyer and have his parental rights taken away so that my fiance can adopt merrick. im hoping that when merrick goes to his grandpa's (ex's dad) that ex wont show up here asking to talk to me. i do think its dumb that u can get in trouble for denying him visitation.

Jessesbride
12-23-2007, 02:49 PM
I'm sorry your going thru this!!!

I was going thru this w/my ds' sperm donor (he's a complete no show) I went thru DHS (department of human service) child enforcement agency & they help keep track of his pmts for me- so not my word against his! in ok nonpayment of cs means loss of d. license & jail time! so i know that even tho he will only pay so much during ea. month he will catch up at income tax time (they "steal" what he owes & give it back to me! lol!). BUT it sucks if you have to depend on it!!!

:cheerup: U know who is the reliable one to take care of your kids & they will know too!

Kim

mmy2grls
12-24-2007, 02:48 AM
The friend of the court is looking into nonpayment, they assured me his wages will be garnished if he does not pay willingly and he will get a letter to appear for a show cause hearing Jan 1st if he hasn't paid.

mmy2grls
12-28-2007, 05:44 AM
Well he came to visit on Christmas and he did bring both my kids some nice presents.

He asked if we needed anything and I said it would help if he picked up a package of diapers or buy some baby cream I use for my baby that costs about $7, or juice for the kids.........he didn't buy nothing, don't know why he even asked *rolls eyes*

wildflowerpa
12-28-2007, 07:54 AM
Sorry you're going through this. I guess we are going back and try for support (even though the ex says shes handicaped.......I guess being a coke addict is handicapped). The domestics office got a kick out of it. Problem is if she steps one foot in the state she's going to jail anyway. Hope things get better for you

mmy2grls
12-29-2007, 04:59 PM
YES! He finally paid! I called the automated system and he did pay.

I'm so happy, now I can take Mon-Wed off from work this week and spend it playing with my kids all day, my oldest goes back to school Thursday. I'm so glad I can have extra quality time with my children