Baby shower?

**ttistin** · 07-29-2010, 12:06 PM

I am thinking about throwing my own baby shower. It is our 4th child but with our youngest being 8 (she will be 9 when baby gets here) We had given everything away. We did happen to find a crib, swing and car seat and a friend gave us a stroller but that is all we have.

We have not been able to find out what the sex is at last ultra sound. Dr is a little worried about the baby growing (cause I have only gained 3 lbs and am 26 weeks along) so he is waiting till I am about 31-32 weeks along before next ultra sound. So It would have to be a neutral theme baby shower.

Dh's family did not attend the shower that was thrown for me for 1st child so I really don't feel bad about asking them to come. No one has offered to throw me one or help so it would be all up to dh and I, which is fine with me.

I am not sure where to have it, need to look into a couple places. I am thinking about asking dh's sisters and his mom to bring a dish to pass. Seeing how dh and I would have to pay for invites and decorations. Or should dh and I just do it all? I am kinda torn on seeing how we will have to throw it on our own should we ask for the help or just do it by ourselves?

I am planning on it being with kids and males invited so it will be a few more people but not that big of a deal.

So what would you do?

**nuisance26** · 07-29-2010, 04:27 PM

~I really don't know the current social rules about this kind of thing, but in the past it's always been considered tacky to throw a shower for yourself.
Some people get around this by having a "Sip & See". It's a party(not called a shower)that happens after the baby is born. The host serves an afternoon coffee/tea or an evening cocktail party. The point is to come see the baby. Most people will bring a gift and it never looks like you're asking them to.
You're probably ok with the weight thing so try not to worry. Unless you were underweight to begin with than your body has enough stored fat to grow the baby for awhile. He/she is only about 1.5-2lb right now. I'd only gained 6lbs at 26 weeks this time around. I tend to gain most in the last 6 weeks.~

**ttistin** · 07-30-2010, 09:50 AM

That is what I thought also but both of dh's sisters threw their own baby shower and when I looked up online about throwing your own it seems like it is acceptable to throw your own now.

I think it would be just to much after the baby is born to have something. With 3 kids plus a the baby plus I would have to do everything (I can't depend on dh's family for help) It stresses me out just thinking about it all lol

Dr said everything was fine with baby. He just wants to make sure the baby growing ok. I am trying to not worry about it. I am eating good and trying not to stress about things.

**ttistin** · 08-05-2010, 11:39 AM

Well dh said nope we are not doing it. Said that he does not even care if his family is there when baby is born (long story there) So he is thinking we will just do what we can and buy from yard sales and craigslist.

Well it will save us money and put me under less stress so I am agreeing with him.

**Kitten20** · 08-05-2010, 12:11 PM

I would keep checking Craigslist, Freecycle and yard sales. But also drop subtle hints to your friends and family.

Maybe someone will decided to throw one for you. I wouldn't throw one for myself, though.

I'm glad your Dr. said everything is okay!!

**ansley** · 08-05-2010, 02:36 PM

I gained very little with my 2nd (I weighed 124lbs so I wasn't big) and my oldest sis lost weight with her last one. All were fine.

Congrats.

**prem** · 10-12-2010, 06:05 AM

hi dear,...
In some countries, a baby shower is a way to celebrate the pending or recent birth of a child by presenting gifts to the parents at a party. The term "shower" is often assumed to mean that the expectant mother is "showered" with gifts.

**nkotbjrkgirl** · 06-08-2011, 04:44 PM

glad to hear your baby is ok. @pram --i LOVE your avi <3 <3

**Debbie-cat** · 06-08-2011, 10:24 PM

I think watching craiglist, freecycle and going to garage sales is the way to go. The money you would spend on your own shower would be better spent hitting these places and getting what you want. Congrats and I am glad the baby is fine.

**mauimagic** · 06-09-2011, 12:45 AM

Lots of good advice here - just keep yourself and that baby healthy!!

**mndtrp** · 06-09-2011, 01:16 AM

I'm the type of person that generally dislikes parties using some pretense of a celebration, that ultimately ends up just being a way to get presents. This applies to baby showers, bridal showers, and to an extent, some weddings. There are others, but I can't think of them off the top of my head. I have no problem getting gifts, or giving, but these things irk me. It's also why I avoid some parts of family around Christmas time, because the focus is on the presents instead of anything else.

Before you decided not to throw the shower, I would have advised you to weigh the costs of throwing the shower, including time involved, against the costs of procuring the items yourself. My wife and I have scored the majority of the physical goods necessary for babies up to toddler age for free from Craigslist, as well as by talking to coworkers and friends. We've come across a lot of people that have stopped having children, but still had all their stuff stored in a garage. They just want the things gone, so they give everything to us. We intend to do the same once we are done.

Keep checking Craigslist, talk to everyone you know, let people know that you are looking for baby stuff.

**BlissMommy** · 06-09-2011, 02:55 AM

I also suggest craigslist and freecycle. I got some things from there and though some friends did throw me a shower all I really got were dressy clothes that my daughter hardly wore. I didn't get anything I had registered for.

**The Muse** · 06-09-2011, 03:59 AM

I'm glad you decided against the shower. It seems that anything goes these days, but that doesn't mean it's not tacky.

Someone threw a shower for my sister when she had her fourth and I even thought that was tacky!

**ml2620** · 06-09-2011, 06:12 AM

I know this is an old thread I am just checking, but also look for local moms groups to join. We have a great one in our area that works through the big tent forums and has classifieds. We have had great luck getting everything we need for free, carseats less than a year old, bumbo seats, even a beautiful upholstered glider and ottoman that I wanted desperately but it priced at 1100 dollars! The good thing about the moms club also is you can ask for things you need, like "does anyone have dress shoes for boys size 4 that I could borrow for a wedding this weekend?"

Such a good rescource for good advice, learning about the community and of course the stuff you need.

Our DD is nine months now and between breast feeding, cloth diapering, gifts, handmedowns and the mothers club, we've spent less than 1000 on DD, and that includes doctor copays!