I have had it with DH's job!

[AnW819]

Just had it!!!

You all remember that he was suppose to get hired on a month ago and not be a temp anymore. Got the work shirts and congrats books, and went to the meetings and then because the lady did not send the paper work on time there is now a freeze on hiring and they are laying off temps and the ones that they want can work anywhere between 3-5 days.

Well..Its bad enough I NEVER see my husband because he works 3rd shift and I have to sleep alone, but now last night they told him next two days he is working 2nd shift. So tonight he goes in at 10pm, comes home 7am, takes me to work, picks me up 6 hours later goes right back to work-late by the way because I am done work til 1:30 and he will not even be able to get their til 2:30.(and will prolly get in trouble for it) And uhm, does this company know about sleep??? How is someone suppose to get sleep? By the time he goes home and eats something and then wakes up and gets ready to go thats 4 hours. They can't even give someone a warning?! I don't drive. How is he suppose to get me to work with them changing stuff all the time??? I have just had it. We can never plan ANYTHING. I don't even want to make plans for my birthday because every week something changes. Okay, I am done now. I am very thankful he has a job. Very, but its really hard on our marriage and with things changing like this and never knowing how many days a week he is gonna work or what times or how is he gonna get me to work is to stressful for me.

P.S. I got my drivers license book but after I pass the test still gotta wait 6 months. So I am trying but this is not going to help matters at all right now.

[Russ]

Keep the goal in mind, getting stable with your life and as you have said, be happy he has a job.
That said, is he actively looking for a new job?

[AnW819]

Yes, he is! Just worried he will not be able to find anything, but looking is the key right?

[Russ]

yes. Finding a job is easier when you have a job. Or so it seems.

[AnW819]

Yeah...Lets hope he can find something. I have been wanting him to wait til I get my license because if he works 1st or 2nd I have no way to work. 3rd is working right now, but they keep switching it so who knows.

[Greebo]

Finding a job is definitely easier when you already have a job.

And finding a job is infinitely easier when you're looking.

So encourage him to hang in there and KEEP looking.

[Mom2-3]

DH worked crazy hours when our 3rd was born. By law he is required to have 8 hours between shifts. It doesn't matter that he has a drive home, or has to eat and shower.

I had three kids, a new house and a sick mom and I still worked part time. DH was working 12-16 hour days. It was HARD! He slept 4-6 hours a day. Sometimes they were not consecutive hours.

It will be hard for a while. You can do it! We survived like that for two years. Our marriage is stronger because of it

[AnW819]

He is not getting 8 hours between his shifts though for the next two days. 6:30am he is done and has to be back @ 2pm. Is it every states law?

[Greebo]

Every state has its own labor laws:
Department of Labor and Workforce Development | Laws and Regulations

[baxjul]

Things will work out. My dh works from 10am until around midnight every day. He took time off to go to the last dance competition of our dd's, and actually cried during her dance because he didn't realize how good she was. He told them at work, he needed to cut back a little, because he never sees her.

[Darlene]

I hope they make his job more predictable and if they don't he gets an even better one soon.
I want to cheer you on in getting your drivers license. I was about 25-26? I think when I finally got mine. I had 2 young kids and really needed to get over my fears and just do it. I did and what freedom! I still won't drive in the snow if i can do anything not to, but other than that I'm out there and loving it. Keep practicing when you can and hang on!!!

[daughter of pearl]

Not sure about where you are working versus where you are living, but is it possible there is someone who could carpool you to work while you are awaiting your license, or do you consider the drive to work quality time with DH?

It's so hard to manage your life when things change so much...hang in...you are doing all the right stuff, and it will get better!

[McD]

Sorry to hear that. It's hard having an absent spouse. Right now, between the PD and the various schools for the upcoming deployment, I very rarely get to see the husband. He only has 3 days off in the month of May. He is on second shift with the PD, so he is gone by the time we are home, and we're asleep when he gets home. We might get to see him for 1 hour at night if he gets to come home on break for dinner, but he is nto fully there because he still has to listen to the scanner, etc.
He'll be gone entire month of June with military training, home for 3 weeks where he will be working for the pd, still have drill for the Guard, then leave for the deployment. The kids are suffering, I'm suffering, he is definitely suffering.

In the meantime, just keep doing what you have to do to make it through the day. If you can wiggle it in the budget, find inexpensive/free little ways to let him know you are thinkingo f him. I always leave a small light on for hubby so he doesn't ahve to walk into a completely dark house.

I leave him post-it notes on the door he comes in. Sometimes they just tell him about our day, sometimes they just say hi, sometimes, I put a joke or a website on it that made me think of him. It helps him feel connected.

Good luck Ash, just keep swimming.

[frugalwarrior2]

My DH and I figured out that he has been out of the house on a business trip 50 days this year. Most of it in Bermuda.
When I went in to labor w/ my 1st child DH went to work. He came to the birth,the next day he went to work. W/ the second child i did a 2 hr. labor,delivered @ 12:00 noon and went home the next day at noon. He talked on the phone to work and I took care of the 2 year old and the newborn. When my DS broke his foot-Rainforest, When the well pump went -on the way out the door to England and on and on.
My point is your an adult now and everything can't be a crisis. You can handle it. He has a job. You are getting your license. Your out of Dads house. Your moving in the right direction. Work is work right now.

And yes I leave him little silly things from garage sales in his office, I used to write notes for his suitcase but not w/ the airlines,we got a webcam,email back and forth almost daily.
It's the little things and the willingness to make the effort that pulls you thru.

[McD]

My point is your an adult now and everything can't be a crisis. You can handle it.

Very good point, FW2.