finding a place to cry

[ssn01]

that's what i'd like. a little corner all of my own... not the whole kitchen... that requires constant work, cleaning & up-keep, that isnt private at all, not the back bathroom that I have to clean & maintain, tho it does have privacy.
the office is shared & isnt always vacant and ppl come & go as they please. the bedroom, it too is of course shared, tho I can get away in there... tho only my clothes & candles are mine.
just a little corner where I can escape. maybe with a chair, so i can read a book, write or simple... be.
but there's not enough room for that.
where can i go? i dont know anyone... everyplace costs money - money I dont have.
hanging out at coffee shops was okay - back then, but not now - especially if you're alone.
i have no time for hobbies - cant even make the meetings that i'd like to go to because "something came up".
but everyone else has hobbies.
hell... i'd just like a friend to call, maybe go out once a month with - to do nothing other than... be.

i just want a small corner of the world to call mine, not a room, not any more than 3 square feet that i could curl up in.

i just want at least one friend... someone who listens to my stupid thoughts & rants - so i wont have to complain or bottle it up at home.

but it's probly too much to ask...
or i dont know how to find time to do any of it.

[jlxian]

Sue, I think everyone on this forum has felt this way at one time or another. And you just have to MAKE TIME FOR YOU. It is not selfish to want time for yourself and in fact it would be good for you.

My dear therapist years ago "prescribed" for me to have lunch one day a week with a good friend -- at a nice place, not a fast food joint. So one day a week I "splurge" on this pleasure. And it is so great and we both look forward to it!

Can you go for a walk? I have found going for a walk, even just 15 or 20 minutes, can be rejuvenating. Plus, it doesn't cost anything. Can you go to the library? In college we used to hide in the nooks in the library to get away from folks so we could study.

I hope this doesn't sound condescending to you. I have felt much the same way you are describing. My advice is to find time for you -- even if you have to do it alone.

Good luck!