Job dilemma

**YankeeMom** · 07-26-2006, 04:02 PM

So this job at Ruby Tuesday is probably mine. I just have to show up in uniform (after I buy it) and be "approved". I'm kind of turned off by that aspect, but I can understand the reasoning behind it. Why put forth all the time, energy, & money to train someone who shows up for the first day of work out of uniform. But still, I have to go out & buy pants, shirt, shoes, belt, socks, and show up with a $20 bank (waitressing/serving) of my own money

Anyways, that's not the dilemma. Because most likely I will take this job when (if?) they offer it. The dilemma is they only have two shifts. Open to 4pm and 4pm to close.

Open to 4pm
Pros:
-working mostly while the kids are at school
-get to be home with them in the evenings and participate in after school activities (if any)
-still able to take them to school (and walk the boys to their classrooms)

Cons:
-would have limited time to do housework without kids underfoot
-would have limited time for errands & dr's appts
-14 & 12 yr olds would have to walk home, 1 mile, all residential, all decent neighborhoods...but still
-8 & 5 yr olds would have to do SACC - school aged child care - after school program run by the YMCA that's at their school. They have crafts, a snack, & get to play outside...real tough right?
-the SACC is $7 per day for the first child and an additional $4 per, so if I would only two school days, that's $22/week. Plus $30 in registration fee. I have no one else I could ask to watch them after school. My 14 & 12yr olds could pick the boys up & walk them home, but I honestly don't know if the boys would behave enough to let the girls walk them home....
-I wouldn't be home if one of the kids needed to be home sick or had to leave school sick or if they have a snow day or weather delay in the winter.
-I wouldn't be able to help out/volunteer at the kids' schools during school hours.

4pm to close
Pros:
-able to run errands, do dr's appts during the day
-able to get housework done during the day
-able to take the kids to school AND pick them up, the girls wouldn't have to walk home and the boys wouldn't have to go to after school care
-make more money on the evening shift (I think...)

Cons:
-no more family dinners
-only have an hour with the kids before having to rush out the door to work
-wouldn't see dh (he works 9am to 6pm) hardly at all

There are more cons for the day shift than there are for the night shift, but for me those are MAJOR cons.
What's a mom to do

If I try to bring this up to dh, he just tells me I'm being difficult and trying to get out of having to work. It's so easy for him, he doesn't have to DECIDE...hmmm...more money or more time with my kids. To me, money is not the be all & end all. And if he hadn't been such a big spender in the past, things wouldn't be as tight as they are right now <_<

I'm feeling pretty resentful right now.

**frugalfarmwife** · 07-26-2006, 04:24 PM

Nights waitressing are MUCH better money, and with the nights hubby gets to do all the evening chores etc with the kids

Also even though they say open to 4 they usually don't keep all the wait staff the whole shift unless they're VERY busy, same with the 4- close shifts, usually they'll close parts of sections, have you do your side work and you'll go home early.

Also, if you can get in and work your way up you could make enough just working Fri-Sat nights to cover what you probably make full time at the sub shop.

Waitressing is good money if you're good at it

I lived well on it for years.

kj

**YankeeMom** · 07-26-2006, 04:35 PM

Thanks KJ

I waitressed for 5 yrs before my youngest was born, I really enjoyed it. I figured, if I have to work waitressing is probably my best bet as I can get more money for less hours.

I highly doubt dh will do ANY housework. I work weekends now and he doesn't. I still come home to the dishes piled high and laundry all over the place. He does strange things that he thinks are helpful. Like clean out the van (and leave the stuff from the van in bags for me to go through). Or clean out our closet (and leave the stuff on our bed for me to go through). Gee, thanks. If I wanted to go through this stuff *I* would have cleaned out the van & the closet

It wouldn't be so bad if he would actually do the stuff I ask him to. I'm making him a honey do list for this weekend though

**Telephus44** · 07-26-2006, 05:57 PM

If I were in your situation, I'd opt for the open to 4pm shift. I agree that the night cons are a lot bigger than the day cons.

Also, just from reading the costs for the SACC - you are only going to be working 2 days a week? Or maybe I'm misreading it? If most of the things that made the job difficult (limited time to run errands or clean house) was only limited to 2 days, that would be easier for me to deal with.

**SHOPGIRL** · 07-26-2006, 06:07 PM

Well, If this were me, I'd opt for the open to 4 shift. The earliest you'd have to start is probably 10 a.m.? Since you have teenagers, I think it's really important to be home at night. Plus, you'd miss out on a lot of family time. I'd start having your older kids help you out around the house. Lunch hours are a very busy time for restaurants, so at least your tables would turn over quickly. You wouldn't have as many alcoholic drinks purchased, but it could still be pretty profitable.

**YankeeMom** · 07-26-2006, 06:12 PM

Sara, I say 2 days because at most I would be working 4 days a week and more than likely 2 of those days would be weekend days. I am leaning more towards the day shift. Being home for my kids is *really* important to me. I just have to become comfortable w/ the hour my boys will be in after school care and my girls walking home (that's the hardest part for me...them walking home). Everything else is just "what ifs", what if there's a weather delay and I have to be taking them to school when I'm supposed to be clocking in to work. What if one of the younger ones is sick and has to stay home on a day I have to work. What if one of them gets sick at school and has to go home. Cuz goodness knows dh (not dear) doesn't have to worry about what will happen to the kids if something doesn't match up.

**kabin63** · 07-26-2006, 06:18 PM

I think I'm with both sides on this. Start out days and work up to doing fri/sat nights and probably make just as much as sub shop. I used to wait tables too, once upon a time, and I know for sure that the dinner hour is the most profitable...Especially Thurs/Fri/Sat

**Darlene** · 07-26-2006, 07:38 PM

I'd go with whatever keeps you home with the family more.

**AmyBoz** · 07-26-2006, 07:44 PM

I have no advice for you, but I wish you the best of luck in figuring out what will be best for you and your family!

**Amanda W** · 07-26-2006, 07:45 PM

If I was in your situation, I think I'd go for the day shift. More then likely you would make more money on nights, but you said yourself that isn't the most important to you.

Have you asked your daughters how they feel about walking home? Are they comfortable with it? If they go to the same school, you could make a rule that they always have to walk together. How do your daughter's friends get home? If they also have parents who pick them up, you could try to arrange for one of the other parents to give your daughters a ride as well.

**Valerie in WA** · 07-26-2006, 07:58 PM

Can you work a mixture of day and evening shifts?

**MandiDawn** · 07-27-2006, 09:52 AM

I'm going the opposite direction and saying work nights. You will save money (by not having them in ASCC) and you will make alot more money on nights. I worked at olive garden (adn that is similar to ruby tuesdays) - I would walk out of day shift with $11, but nights could make $70-$80. wouldn't you be pissed to be gone all day and come home with $11-$20? Your girls are old enough to do almost everything aroudn the house, cook clean, laundry . . . they can help you out (we did at that age while both my parents worked). Also, it won't be every day, just 4 nights a week, it might give your husband more one on one time with the kids, make him start to notice things he didn't before. Just my opinion, but I hate working for nothing.

**Lorelei** · 07-27-2006, 10:09 AM

Heather - tough decision. I'm going to go in totally a new direction and ask why you have to take this job. Since you already have a job, it's not like you can't pay the bills if you continue to look around. Are there other nice restaurants in the area with better hours for you?

If you decide that daytime hours are best for your family, and since waitressing brings in less money during the day, what about finding an office job? You might be able to find a customer service or other position in an office that would pay a better hourly rate than you currently make and may have some benefits.

Good luck in making the best decision. Just remember, whatever you decide isn't forever. You can always go back to the sandwich shop or try something else if this doesn't work out for your family.

**Tamerama** · 07-27-2006, 10:23 AM

I worked a couple of evenings a week for several years and it worked out great until the kids were both in school full time & then they really needed me home in the evenings. I hated the fact that as soon as they got home from school I had to rush them through their homework, their dinner and then I would be waiting for DH to get home so I could rush out the door! It stressed everyone out!! It wasn't worth it to me..
I would go for the day shift & since its only a couple of days a week you can run errands & clean house on the other days. And as others have said you can always quit if it doesn't work out for you whatever you decide.
Good luck with your decision!