Why did you choose not to have children and how have people reacted?
DH and I have always known that we didn't want children, so we were very happy to find each other. We still get a lot of well meaning comments about how we "have time" or will change our minds, etc., but we just smile politely and know that we won't.
Luckily my inlaws think we're "smart" so we don't have to contend with the guilt of not giving them grandchildren.
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Wife since October 5, 2000, mom to 3 naughty, but adorable cats.
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If you could kick in the pants the person responsible for your problems, you wouldn't be able to sit for a month.
Did you know that a 4 year student paying $20,000/year who finances their education graduates with over $103,000 in debt to start? But a student who works and pays cash and takes 6 years to graduate ends with $6,300 in their pocket! So much for "getting a head start by financing!"
Greebo(Nerd Spender): Loving and extremely patiently tolerated husband of ceashels. WARNING: Y Chromosome behind the keyboard. Adjust your listening filters appropriately!
Three Two mortgages, twoone no car loans, one no credit cards, and a partridge in pear tree!
Kids are a lot of work, and they are expensive. I realized early in life that I could barely support myself, and didn't feel it would be right to bring children into the world at that time. I wanted to go to college, and I knew I couldn't afford that and babies. Add to that, the right guy didn't come along until much later. We decided not to have any, he had two from a previous relationship and I felt that my life was full enough without children. I love my brothers' kids when we visit, and DH's when we see them. No regrets there.
I have cats to keep me company at home, and to give affection to, and nobody calls the police if we leave them alone and go away for the weekend.
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Use it up, Wear it out,
Make it do, Or do without. ~unknown
You can't always get what you want
But if you try sometimes you just might find
You get what you need ~Rolling Stones
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We didn't choose. Both of ours died in their 20's. So, technically we're more empty- nesters I think. I dunno. I find that kids annoy the crap out of me anymore. They just come across so spoiled and demanding. I really don't remember mine being that way but maybe I'm making them out to be angels now when in fact they weren't when they were little.
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Ok, so TECHNICALLY I'm not childfree, but biologically, I am. No pregnancy, no childbirth, no nursing...none of that. But we did "save" 3 children from lives full of dispair in orphanages in desitute locations.
(ok, not that I am saying "look at me, yea me", but for many, the reason to be childfree has to do with the impacy on the environment and society, and so in that regard, I "fit the bill")
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Traci
dh 17 years
ds 11 ~ Russia
ds 11 ~ Russia
dd 4 ~ China
I'm sorry to seem ignorant....but I'm still trying to identify what *genderqueer* means??? Is that another term for asexual? Just curious.....(really...I have no idea)
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Stinkbug
More wagging - Less barking
Last edited by stinkbug; 02-24-2009 at 06:23 PM.
Reason: clarify
I'm sorry to seem ignorant....but I'm still trying to identify what *genderqueer* means??? Is that another term for asexual? Just curious.....(really...I have no idea)
genderqueer has to do with gender identification. i'm both a boy and girl mentally and a girl physically. its like being a transexual and a "normal" girl. most people dont get it.
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fling: 0000/2010 kindness is unlimited
2010 Goal: get out of debt and visit my gf in arizona
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I'm sorry to seem ignorant....but I'm still trying to identify what *genderqueer* means??? Is that another term for asexual? Just curious.....(really...I have no idea)
.....yea, I have to admit, I read it a few times myself.
I gathered it was something like the answer she gave...(lol, it is SHE, right?? lol)
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Traci
dh 17 years
ds 11 ~ Russia
ds 11 ~ Russia
dd 4 ~ China
Why: expense, enormous responsibility, lack of free time, fear of losing myself, feeling like my life would end the moment I became a mother, expense, expense, expense, noise, lack of tranquility, cats would be jealous.
The people who count the most -- family -- have been very supportive. Some of them are CFBC, too.
__________________ How we behave toward cats here below determines our status in heaven. - Robert A. Heinlein
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I've felt that way since I was a child, I never played house, or mommy and I do not feel comfortable around babies. As I got older, I honestly just don't think I could do it, and I would probably be mad all the time or feel guilty.
Also, it isn't something I'm willing to risk, you know, just have a child and hope it all works out? kwim?
DH had a fantasyland childhood and never considered not having child, but also never really considered it either. I think if we had kids, I would be the one taking care of them, and that is not what I want for my life. Also this last year has scared the crap out of me, and I don't know how my parents made it through, but I don't think I could handle a child going through what I went through.
That being said, who knows? I'm a different person then I was 10 years ago, maybe I'll change my mind. I doubt it.
lgw I just have to say, I love your avatar, is that your cat? I have one very similar, mostly white with a little tabby. I swear he gets that look on his face too, mostly when he wants my lap that was already occupied by my laptop!