I'm really shaking up Christmas NEXT year--2009?

**cab54** · 10-11-2008, 11:00 PM

Originally Posted by Ceashels

Dear Families,

For the past 12 years the holiday meals and gatherings have been in our home. I am sure we would agree that we have had fun, smiles and great times. What you may not have seen though is the 3 days we spend making sure everything is prepared, the house is clean, the toilets are scoured, table linens and dishes are clean and set up, extra tables laid out. What you may not have noticed is the exhaustion in the kitchen or the hidden tears when I can not sit and have conversations with family as I busily prepare all of the little things that are needed for our meal and time together.

So this coming holiday will be different. Please feel free to bring a dish, lay the tables, and clean the toilets. The turkey is in the freezer, the key is under the mat so come 3 days early to get it thawed and ready. We will be enjoying each others company at our cabin but will be with you in spirit.

Please lock up when you are finished,
Love
Mom and Dad

LOL! Love it!

**Libby** · 10-12-2008, 09:16 AM

Cab thats a wonderful idea to go get secluded with immediate members only for the 'special' holidays.

With each passing holiday, everyone just 'expects' and does nothing to help except for offer insincerely. Our family is similiar to that but the only thing we expect is FOOD. LOL I help the host family prepare, set up and clean up on the day of. I even bring items to lessen the burden on their budget unlike other members of my family.

You get out of each holiday, what you put in. If no one else puts in, they shouldn't get anything out of it....catch my drift???

We had a small plan for this Christmas...head off to Florida where its warmer however with the economy turning as it has been lately...we're going to stay home AND do Christmas w/o any gifts. I'm perfectly fine with this - less shopping, no getting gifts and trying to figure out what to do with them LOL craigslist here I come!

**LuvMyHubby** · 10-12-2008, 11:13 AM

Good Luck to you, I am sure most of your families will understand.

We don't host either Thanksgiving or Christmas as our apartment is way too small for the number of people who attend both but we always try to bring food and help clean up and set up. Christmas is always at my MIL/FIL as "it is Grammie's holiday"

**BlessedMomof2** · 10-13-2008, 09:18 AM

Good Luck!!

**faw42077** · 10-13-2008, 09:26 AM

Good Luck! I understand where you are coming from. About 5 years ago we decided that things needed to change for us also. On Christmas Eve, we usually go to MIL's house and then to DH uncle's house, then we'd get home around 11 pm, put the kids to bed, do Santa stuff, get up at 6 am and let kids see their toys, get dress and then drive to be at my Dad's by 9 am and then spend all day there and not get home until 9 or 10 am. It was madness, so 5 years ago we made the decision that we were gonna spend Christmas day at home with the kids. We still go to MIL's for a few hours(she only lives 200 feet away

) but thats it. Our kids love it and we love it and I should have done it along time ago.

**madhen** · 11-05-2008, 11:14 AM

I rarely see my family, which consists of one sibling (with hubby and son in tow) and my mother, so I do actually enjoy hosting Christmas every year. This year, I might not get the opportunity, as my sister's parents-in-law are visiting from out of state and have hinted that they might stay through the holidays. Her husband is one of about six kids, and his parents are big on having "their" family be together, so she might have to do something with them for both T-day (when I usually go to her house) *and* Christmas. Depends on how long the parents decide to stay.

I started a Christmas 2009 fund last month, just to be able to have a lavish Christmas next year. (This year, with $7,000 and counting in roof repair going on, will be a bit skinny.) My mother, who is a pain in the butt and really kind of a horrible person, is still my mother, and she loves the ceremony of Christmas eve, so I figure it doesn't hurt to give her a treat for the few she has left. (Although we joke that she will outlive both of us, just because she is so mean and spiteful, even Death is afraid of her!)

**suzysaver** · 11-05-2008, 11:45 AM

We are changing things up this year. I have hosted a christmas eve party for the last 7 years or so, but not this year. I always have to work on christmas eve until 6 p.m. and come home to a house full of people and then have to rush around getting the food ready, After working all day and coming home tired..and then having to paint on the christmas cheer, when I'm dreaming of a nice quiet evening with my Dh. I explained this to my mom and she told me lets not do it this year...and don't you worry about it.
My mom and dad will be over on christmas day and that will be it.
My mother used to host the christmas eve party and I would only see some of these people once a year and it always seemed that we had unexpected friends and others they would bring with them. My mother finally had decided it was out of hand one year and that was it. Some of these people were in shock and didn't know where they would go for christmas eve??? She stayed strong and held her ground. Enjoy those holidays as they should be and reflect on the important things.

**madhen** · 11-05-2008, 11:53 AM

Unfortunately, I think it is just a case of too many mothers who are like that. I'd like to think mine is an evil phenomena, but that would be pretty optimistic. I always wonder how well-adjusted and wonderful a person I would be if I hadn't started life out with such HUGE baggage.

**kittykatstrong** · 11-05-2008, 11:40 PM

Brfore kids I would go to 2 or 3 places on christmas day. Now that I have two little ones we go to the DH side of the family on Christmas Eve but on Christmas day if any one wants to see us they have to come to me.

And I wont do a huge spread. Christmas day is about family for me not food.