I'm really shaking up Christmas NEXT year--2009?

**cab54** · 10-08-2008, 05:00 PM

OMG, the

is gonna hit the

next year. Maybe even this year when we try to break it to our families. We are thinking of spending the whole year, including holidays (Thanksgiving&Christmas) up here at our cabin in MI from may 2009 to May 2010.

Our families back in Ohio are used to us hosting the holidays for 20+ people. We (*I*) do Thanksgiving for his fam. We do Christmas Eve for mine, and then (YES!) Christmas day for his. It's been like that for 12 years.

It's not JUST that we are tired of the work and mess, but we are tired of the BIG lots 'o' people holidays. Our families are huge and the holidays are like a blur for me. Food, cleaning, dishes, convo, convo, and all of a sudden it's over, and I haven't had a bit of time with those closest to me (namely my sons), and spent sooooo much time on what I see as

. None of it has been about Jesus or his birth, let alone been fun!

I started voicing this to dh lately, about how I yearn for a peaceful, calm, QUIET, reflective holiday with him and our sons (if they can fly out). So we're doing it!! Next year, if nothing goes terribly wrong. I am so psyched!

Even if our kids couldn't make it (they are in school and work etc) we could have a 'just' dh and me Christmas. We have NEVER (in 35 years) had a holiday that wasn't controlled by everyone else! Yay!

Wish us luck breaking this to the fams. Hee hee.

**Moor** · 10-08-2008, 05:11 PM

Good luck!

I really wish that we were able to do something like that! I would love to get away from the family once in a while.

**Cricketlegs** · 10-08-2008, 05:18 PM

You just make sure you do it! You have done your part for many years and now it gets to be about you and your dh!

I am assuming the 25 plus people are adults and have homes and ovens....just say NO to

**frugalbabe** · 10-08-2008, 06:21 PM

I admire your guts lady! I might just try this as well....we are the same way always the host family for everyone. One Christmas I was huge pregnant and told evryone they were welcome to come but I would not be doing the cooking and cleaning. Mysteriously no one could come (strange huh?) that was one of the nicest Christmases we've had in a long time I must say!

**cab54** · 10-08-2008, 07:12 PM

frugalbabe, LOL! You mean if you weren't cooking for them, they stayed home? Wow. I suspect with at some of the people in question (dh's family no doubt) they only like Christmas at our house, because I put out a big spread.

And THEY don't have to. My family all brings a dish, but I have the main stuff ready.

It will just be nice to have a break from the usual, though. Things are changing, our kids are almost all grown up, and yet everyone wants to have Christmas in one place. Eventually I think they will all recognize that it is getting too big, and we need to break off into our respective 'immediate' families.

Don't get the idea that I take having family for granted. These people all mean a lot ot me. I'm very lucky to have folks in my life. But I would just like to experience a COUPLE of quiet Christmases. It's a need I have, LOL.

**Luv2BeFrugal** · 10-08-2008, 11:14 PM

Good luck!!! Hope you really enjoy *your* holiday!!

**sdrjeolsen** · 10-08-2008, 11:44 PM

Good Luck! We broke ranks last year and for the first time in 22 years didn't celebrate with family. Just us and ours, it was the best christmas...and our new tradition. We didn't get too much flack, hope your's goes equally smooth.

**Karla** · 10-09-2008, 01:33 AM

Good for you, just tell them then stick to your guns...I hope it is a great holiday for you and your family.

**Ceashels** · 10-09-2008, 08:45 AM

Dear Families,

For the past 12 years the holiday meals and gatherings have been in our home. I am sure we would agree that we have had fun, smiles and great times. What you may not have seen though is the 3 days we spend making sure everything is prepared, the house is clean, the toilets are scoured, table linens and dishes are clean and set up, extra tables laid out. What you may not have noticed is the exhaustion in the kitchen or the hidden tears when I can not sit and have conversations with family as I busily prepare all of the little things that are needed for our meal and time together.

So this coming holiday will be different. Please feel free to bring a dish, lay the tables, and clean the toilets. The turkey is in the freezer, the key is under the mat so come 3 days early to get it thawed and ready. We will be enjoying each others company at our cabin but will be with you in spirit.

Please lock up when you are finished,
Love
Mom and Dad

**mikandmari** · 10-09-2008, 08:58 AM

Cheryl, you'll be living my dream! I just want to disappear over the holidaze

I love my family, but the commotion makes Christmas hectic and stressful. I'm tired of it being one party after another.

And Thanksgiving is even worse. It seems that at Christmas, everyone is pre-occupied with the kids, gifts, etc. But at Thanksgiving (after we overeat) I just have a couple of relatives with mouths bigger than brains who like to stir things up with conversations and remarks that are inflammatory, insulting...

I have a friend with a small place a few miles from the beach. I really just want to hide out there, but with an elderly mother and a full-of-angst teenager I don't feel like I can.

Good luck with your decision! I'm very jealous

**VanVivCam** · 10-09-2008, 09:01 AM

good luck. enjoy your cabin

**JanieD** · 10-09-2008, 10:16 AM

Seems like many of us are dreaming of a different kind of holiday! I've even mention to DH how disappointed I'm feeling already just thinking about Christmas. Our situation is somewhat different: no hosting, just rushing here & there; no kids, but we are expected to understand Christmas is for/about the kids...wait, what? & the list goes on.

I enjoy time spent with family, but sometimes it not everything you'd like it to be & want a change. I hoping several small changes will bring more joy to our holiday this year. And that everyone will find ways to make their holidays exactly what you're dreaming of!

**Laura2** · 10-11-2008, 12:50 AM

Good for you. Hopefully the family takes it well. Will you be telling them on Thanksgiving or Christmas?

**miss_thrifty** · 10-11-2008, 09:15 AM

let us know how it goes when u tell them them. some may be diappointed but then maybe once they see its not about them and u want peace and quiet(dont blame ya), theyll rethink why u kept doing it the first place.
HHUUGGSSS