Are the holiday pleasant or stressful for you?

**guest2** · 11-25-2003, 07:25 PM

I was thinking about this today and how the holidays are shown as these wonderful joyous big family occasions in the commercials on tv. Is that reality in your home or are they more stressful?

If it were just our immediate family, I'd say it is pretty joyful, but throw in the extended family and things can get hairy at times. There seems to be an ongoing competition in some of our family members to be the center of attention. Then there is also the "gloom and doom" talk where everyone feels free to share all their ailments and those of their friends. And help us all if someone has to go to another family celebration that same day because the jealousy starts and it's horrible! I just want to stay home and be with my little family!!!! Lord, let it snow, let it snow, let it snow!!!!

**voodidit** · 11-25-2003, 07:30 PM

It tends to be very stressful for me. We are expected to be at everyones house on the same day, half the time at the same time. Some times I just want to stay in the bed all day that day and just not deal with it!

**Darlene** · 11-25-2003, 07:36 PM

It's very relaxing. We used to go to the inlaws but as families grew and M&D insisted on serving at the table( could be 30 people& I think they'd still want to serve that way,lol) & everyone ate cold food etc. we decided to do our own dinner at home. We just get together with extended family the day before or after Thanksgiving. Less stress on everyone. Works for us.

**guest2** · 11-25-2003, 07:36 PM

Hey Angie,
My vote is that you do stay in bed and put a do not disturb sign on your front door!

I'm kinda thinking this might be a great year for me to try this!!!

**gkp1031** · 11-25-2003, 07:43 PM

It's stressful for me, SO and I are expected to be at my parents and at his mom's for dinner, his family never plans anything, so we never know what time dinner is. We usually end up accepting my parents invite first because they give a time that we're eating, and wouldn't you know it, his family ends up eating at the same time.

And, in addition to that, my mother ends up getting sick because she's busy preparing and baking for dinner, so that makes her grumpy and miserable.

But, the food is good and everything is back to normal by 8p.m.!!

Gina

**lucy979** · 11-26-2003, 04:23 AM

his family never plans anything, so we never know what time dinner is.

This is my dh's family. My family always knows what time they are going to eat. But it is so hard because we have to go to my grandparents, my dad's, dh's mom's and dh's dad's. Lots of food!! LOL But lots of jealousy too.

**simplemom** · 11-26-2003, 06:15 AM

Originally posted by lucy979
This is my dh's family. My family always knows what time they are going to eat. But it is so hard because we have to go to my grandparents, my dad's, dh's mom's and dh's dad's. Lots of food!! LOL But lots of jealousy too.

Lucy..do you have to go all in the same day?....sorry if I sound naive...just wondering.

When Francois a small we used to eat dinners with my parents and supper with my inlaws on Christmas and the same thing on new years day. Then one year, my mil so generously suggested we visit them only on new years. So now, we see my parents at Christmas and my inlaws at newyears.

**PrairieRose** · 11-26-2003, 09:38 AM

It's usually stressful for me. If I could do it for just my family and parents and dh's parents I think it would be bliss. Next year we're gonna do what Darlene said she does and just do our own holidays. We'll make time to visit some other time. I've just about had it with my extended family...........

**frugalmel** · 11-26-2003, 09:58 AM

Mine is stressful because I start missing my folks. Its also hard to see the extended family that still living (90 miles from dh'sfam) since they all have diff scedules.

**AmyMCGS** · 11-26-2003, 10:57 AM

I LOVE the holidays, in fact I get a little bit hyper this time of year.

The rest of the year my family and my in-laws can stress me out, but for Thanksgiving and Christmas we just do what we can and let the rest go. I have no idea how I got to this attitude, but it has been a big release for me. For some reason at the holidays I'm able to let things roll off my back much easier than the rest of the year.

This year, we're going to my parents' for lunch, and his mom's for dinner. Those two houses will be more than enough for the baby.

**Guest1** · 11-26-2003, 11:03 AM

I hate it, I hate it, I hate it..........
I'm about ready to go crawl under a rock right now & (thank goodness) we're 3,000 miles from family....just want it to be mid-January....I *hate* this time of year.

**pip** · 11-26-2003, 05:00 PM

The holidays seem to be getting more stressful as time goes on. I thought that as the kids grew older, it would get easier, but it seems the *family*(extended family, that is) is getting more divided and grudge-holding. Yuck. I'm trying to simplify things and tell myself not to take it all so seriously, but that is not always so easy! Well, Merry Christmas, all!

**Missy** · 11-26-2003, 05:21 PM

It is stressful for me. DH's family makes the holidays full of fights and bickering. I hate it.

I just make my holiday dinner and we eat at home, away from the fights.

**Dixie** · 11-26-2003, 06:58 PM

I love what Thanksgiving is supposed to be about, giving thanks to God for our many blessings, but it is stressful, because I make it so. I'm a perfectionist. The house has to be perfect, the food perfect and so on. I'm usually up 'til 2 am the night before, getting everything done. My 18 yo son told me today, he wished I would chill and just enjoy the holidays. He said I was making everyone miserable with my perfectionism. Maybe he has a point.
Also, Christmas is about the birth of my Saviour, Jesus, but of course it's been turned into a commercialized mess. I get so stressed between Thanksgiving and New Years. Also, my dgs' b'day, my youngest son and oldest ddil all have b'days during the time between Oct.25 and Dec.8. So I'm busy with the b'day activities,too. Calgon, take me away.