How much is too much???

**momof42003** · 11-12-2005, 03:57 AM

Budgeting for Christmas gifts that is... I tend to want to get a couple of nice items, and spend less money, and DH would want to blow the bank roll on them... I don't think my kids need quads, or their own computers (yet).... I was looking along the lines of electic keyboard for dd, metal detector for ds, and a telescope for the other ds... That alone would be three hundred or so dollars.. Is that too much?? I know when I was a kid 200.00 was spent on all four kids... What are you hoping to spend, and does DH/SO have different ideas when it comes to how much to spend??? Just curious.. TIA.

**favesis37** · 11-12-2005, 07:34 AM

hubby has no idea what i spend, as longas the bills are paid he doesn't care, however this year almost all my items have been clearanced. i have gone from spenidng maybe 2,000 on christmas to this year maybe 150.00! i love it!

**sarathom** · 11-12-2005, 08:06 AM

I have a real problem with the commercialism of Christmas. My kids each get one gift from us. We probably spend no more than $20 per gift. And then their one gift from Santa (again, no more than $20). Gifts for our folks are usually something homemade and with a theme (eg/ winter kit....hm hot chocolate mix, mugs, a good book etc.). Again, money spent would be around $10. Nephews & neices (all four of them) each get something small. And that's all. DH and I don't exchange gifts ever. We like putting any extra money we have towards something we need (one year was a washer/dryer etc.)

We try to remind our kids that xmas is about reflecting on what we have and being so greatful. The fact that we can get together with family and friends shows how lucky we are. It's not about the gifts, its about the togetherness and friendships.

Sorry for babbling, I just think it's crazy for people to go into complete debt over xmas. Shame on all the companies/businesses that promote love by buying expensive gifts.

I love my family dearly, but I don't need to go into debt to show them how much I love them.

So, I probably spend no more than $200 total for xmas. This includes turkey and fixin's, wine, presents, new decorations etc.

**babymav** · 11-12-2005, 09:29 AM

We spend about 250 on each child. No gift exchanging between hubby and I. We spend about 800 total for family and friends. We have tons of people that we have to buy for. We like to keep the total amount spend under $1500.00 but that's not always the case. Hopefully this year we can get it even lower.

**northernmom2boys** · 11-12-2005, 09:37 AM

Morning All
I have to admit in the years past it has been how many gifts they get that important to me.Nedless to say with a 4 year old and 8 year old we have alot of toys lol
This year my dh and I have agreed to only buy 2 gifts each and stocking stuffers for the kids.They get gifts from family so they will not want for anything.I want to teach them that its not only about getting at xmas but giving as well.[COLOR=teal][COLOR=blue]
Dh and I are not exchanging gifts this year because we bought ourselves a new laptop last month.
I do need suggestions for my inlaw gifts,they have everything and I have no idea what to get them.
So Im planning on spending 100 on each chid,I hope lol

**northernmom2boys** · 11-12-2005, 09:38 AM

woops whay did the colour blue come up lol

**Jellybeanz** · 11-12-2005, 10:07 AM

Yes, he has different ideas on what to spend than I do ! It's a source of stress for me every year. I like to set a dollar amount and mind you, I'm not stingy ( least I don't think lol) Both kids are over 18. One living on his own with a child. He wants to buy them high dollar stuff ( like hundreds a piece plus another few hundred on grandchild) . We don't have it. So he spends grocery/bill money after he drains what we have in savings. That is why I dread this whole thing every year.

I've tried talking, reasoning and everything I can think of to tell him this is unneccessary to no avail. Wish I could just enjoy the season just once instead of stressing because of $.( No I can't just stop his access to the money, he won't have that .Wish I could, I'd bring stuff like this to a halt.)

Oh well, sorry for complaining, this is a sore spot for me.

No solutions here, just an understanding nod.

**QuilterMom** · 11-12-2005, 10:18 AM

We've lowered what we're spending this year. $100 on ds plus $10 for his stocking. $75 each on dh and me plus $10 each on our stockings. I should add that ds doesn't really get anything during the year except treasures found at yard sales and thrift stores and just a couple of small things for his bday. Dh and I don't exchange any gifts throughout the year (bdays, anniversary).

We don't buy gifts for any other family members and give homemade mixes to ds's teachers at church.

**midwestgal** · 11-12-2005, 11:20 AM

We try to keep Christmas pretty modest at our home. I usually buy all our Christmas gifts in January and February after Christmas when sales are 50-75% off. During the year, I keep my eyes open for gifts at garage sales that can be regifted. One year I found our older daughter a gorgeous set of white English ironstone dinnerware for just $48! (It was a complete set for 12 plus all serving pieces. A woman was selling her late mother's estate. I checked out the exact set at an upscale dept. store, and it was $55 for each place setting!) DD and husband love and use it. I would estimate my total expenses are about $350-400, and this is for 4 children, son-in-law, husband and our moms. All of our siblings decided long ago that exchanging cards or home-baked yummies was good enough since we all have families to buy for. I too like the spirit of the season. I like to bake cookies, listen to Christmas music, entertain friends and family and write short notes in my Christmas cards that I mail. I just don't like to get stressed out at Christmas and spend too much!

**staceyy** · 11-12-2005, 12:10 PM

Lots of gifts used to be the highlight of our Christmases until I asked my daughter what was her favorite Christmas. I was surprised to learn it was the Christmas I had no money and gave her a bunch of old collectible dolls someone gave me. I took a lot of time putting thought into that Christmas and did extra baking, cooking and decorating and playing Christmas music. Later as my income increased I went to spending between $1000 and $2000 per year for Christmas but no one really seemed to appreciate it. I now spend about $250.

**PrairieRose** · 11-12-2005, 12:36 PM

I really hate to tell ya what I used to spend on the dk's when they were all at home. It was probably close to $350 each

We didn't buy them things during the year to speak of so I was the one that spoilt them during the holidays. Now I spend $150 max and am trying to do much better than that, shopping ebay, overstock, etc... . This will be the first year that I'm buying 1 gift each. No stockings, no fun gifts, no extras to make sure everyone's gift comes up to the same amount. 1 gift each. Next year my goal is to spend $100 and keep it there or under from now on. I want to simplify our holiday season, the kids are grown and they don't need as much anymore. Gripey and I usually agree to purchase something that we both want together before or after Christmas. I don't really know what that amount is. Maybe $100 each or so. I don't think your amounts are too much but I wouldn't go into debt over Christmas either. It's not worth it.

**inneedofhope** · 11-13-2005, 08:57 PM

To me it's not about how much I spend or how many gifts I buy. To me the spirit of christmas is giving which I do enjoy. I do what I can with what I have, and gifts have to be thoughtful and meaningful so I spend time thinking about each persons interests and what they would enjoy. Ds got alot more Santa gifts last year than he will this year just because he was at an age where he was growing out of what he had and I had money to spend. This year he has so much, and I have limited funds so he will get a few things he's interested in and that will be enough.
If I had more money I would do more, like buy the kids tickets to a live show or plan a January get away for ds and I. And there would definately be some higher priced gifts, but nothing that would put me in debt! And we would be donating a lot more to charity as well.
You can only give what you have, and that is always enough.

**pita1213** · 11-13-2005, 10:21 PM

i wanted to do a mostly homemade christmas this year, with one or two items purchased. dh and the kids got it in their heads to get an xbox 360

every so often dh says they get 3 gifts and that's it and then he flops back and says we shouldn't scrimp on the kids.
i think this goes back to when he was a kid and didn't get much and then seeing his younger brother and sisters getting everything they wanted( there is 10 years between him and his younger brother and his twin sisters are a year yonger than his brother) he waffles between not wanting them to grow up like spoiled brats like his siblings and not wanting them to feel left out like him.

we all had a talk about getting th exbox and i told them tht if that is what they really want, we'd go ahead and get it (preordered it already hopefully it all comes) but that was it for presents other than their stockings and the things i had already crocheted for them. they were ok with that, so we'll see how it all goes.

this is the most we've spent on christmas ever, but it's a big ticket item. for the other relatives, i've been slowly toning down their gifts as far as money spent. more homemade items and some freebies. my side of the family is easy to do this for. none of us want to go into debt for presents. dh's side is a bit harder. i wasn't even going to bother this year after last year's behavior (not just christmas time, but throughout the year, though tha'ts a whole other thread) but decided to make one last effort and if they don't like what i have made for them, i won't bother next year.

hmm that last bit was sort of a vent, sorry about that.

as far as the amount to be spent, for us it changes year to year, depending on our fiances. to me too much is when you are going into debt or when it becomes ALL about the gifts and not about spending time with family and that kind of thing.

**Scattymum** · 11-14-2005, 07:23 AM

This year I have spent about 100 Euro on DD(6). I have bought her 2 biggish presents which she had in her *list* and a few stocking fillers. DS(2) I have spent about 40Euro, he will get one present from santa and one from us, They will get lots of presents from relatives and too be honest last christmas was ridiculous, DD had so many gifts she just looked at and didnt even play with, there was just too much. I have asked some relatives to buy the kids clothes instead of toys.As for DS he doesnt play with toys so I really dont see the point in wasting money on toys for him that will never get used, I know some family members will comment on how little I have bought but I really dont care, the real resons of christmas seem to have been forgotten and overtaken by commercialism.

As for other people, I am doing alot of homemade gifts this year, I have spent about 200Euro throughout the year on gifts and bits for the homemade items.

DH would love to go all out and spend hundreds on the kids - he had a rough childhood and I think he just wants them to have what he didnt.

**Michelle** · 11-14-2005, 07:32 AM

I think it's a very personal decision dependant on a lot of factors when deciding how much to budget for Christmas. Generally I say about $100 total (gifts + stocking + outfits) per child. I am able to find deals throughout the year, so this works out well for us. I keep track of everything I've bought and how much I've spent in an Excel spreadsheet (password protected so little eyes can't read it

)

We only buy for my nephew and my kids, and the rest of the gifts we give out are small things that I've made, so this works out well for us.