Christmas and work - vent!

**britbunny** · 11-28-2006, 06:11 AM

Apologies for my negativity but I think this is the only place I can get it off my chest...

DH and I have only just really started "doing" Christmas. We have bought all our gifts and organised when we are visiting family and all that.

DH has 2 lunches he *has* to attend at work, both of which he has to pay for himself. He chooses to not socialise with people from work for various reasons so he's already pretty peeved that he has to attend these lunches.

Thankfully he did have some say on the venue as certain people wanted to go to a place where the meal would be £20. Bearing in mind we have spent only about £100 on ALL our christmas gifts this year you can see why it's a bit much.

Yesterday he received an email saying he *must* also be involved with "secret santa", he hasn't bothered before, but there is a new boss and everyone must do it.But it still comes out of our pocket!

It really annoys me where DH has no choice but to participate yet it costs us money. The secret santa is £5 per person. We are also frugal (obviously) and we are pretty green too, so we both resent the fact that Dh is expected to waste money on some bit of useless tat and rubbish just for the sake of joining in.

So, I like to end on a positive note! I came up with the idea of buying a charity gift, this way DH has followed the rules yet we have not compromised our principles. There aren't many gifts available for such a low price but are going to buy two text books for a needy child. It's the best of all worlds and hopefully it will make other people remember the spirit of the season.

Thanks for reading.

**nuisance26** · 11-28-2006, 08:49 AM

~Awesome idea! It's hard to believe they would force an employee to participate. I wonder if a boss could get away with that here? I doubt it!~

**lottaLove** · 11-28-2006, 11:38 AM

I think that the textbooks are a wonderful idea. I hope it works out, and people remember the spirit of the season!

**baxjul** · 11-28-2006, 07:56 PM

I think that is a great idea!

**MarshHen** · 11-29-2006, 07:27 AM

I love your idea, and if dh's boss doesn't, he is a scrooge, LOL.

**dmvezina** · 11-29-2006, 07:53 AM

That is a good idea!

I've never heard of being "forced" to participate in that!!
Wow!

**britbunny** · 11-29-2006, 07:59 AM

Thnaks for all your support, I have calmed down a little now.

The last few years this thing has been optional (as it should be) but the new boss in DH's office is a wazzock and is obsessed with "team bonding" and all that... he is even trying to force the office into starting a pub quiz team!

Suffice to say there's not much Christmas cheer being generated at the minute. There's plenty here at home though!

**Michelle** · 11-29-2006, 08:10 AM

Originally Posted by nuisance26

~Awesome idea! It's hard to believe they would force an employee to participate. I wonder if a boss could get away with that here? I doubt it!~

Yep--my dh has experienced that as well. Legally I'm sure they can't force him, but for work etiquette purposes he *has* to participate. It reflects negatively on him if he doesn't.

And yes, I agree it's horrible and a shame that it has to be that way.

**sheidi** · 12-09-2006, 09:21 PM

we have two lunches as well, one for our little section and one for the wider branch. the bigger one is $20 for a barbie which is at work (we have a cafeteria and and outside area) and $5 for secret santa. you have to bring your own drinks. one woman is pushing the heck out of it, apparently she wanted the ss to be $15! that's all well and good for wealthy folks, but $25 is way out of my budget, so i said no. i got some looks. can't believe your dh's boss thinks its okay to force people! i didn't go to a farewell lunch recently ( i didn't know the person and it was $40!!!), one of my colleagues actually told the organiser i couldn't afford it, i was furious - i don't need to explain, and its none of their business.

the other one i can't get out of, it would be considered really rude if i didn't attend - plus i had to organise it. the problem with it i have is that the four people i work with earn twice to three times as much as i do, they all own there own homes and are doing well. i hate that they think i can afford the same. they will provide the alcohol, but i can't drink anyway as i'll be driving. i reckon i'll be lucky to get out for under $30.

oh well, sometimes you just have to suck it up i guess.

**britbunny** · 12-10-2006, 06:37 AM

Well, the Christmas meals are this coming week, thankfully the gift has arrived. There is a card saying "thanks for buying this great gift" and a fridge magnet with a picture of some schoolchildren on it - ie the recipients of the gift.

You're right that we do have to suck it up. so DH has decided to just make the most of it and enjoy the food - if not the company!

We went to the pub quiz this week... there were a lot of people there so the charity must have raised quite a lot of money. We WON!!! So DH and I get to take a spa day at a local hotel. So not too bad in the end.

**Dixie** · 12-10-2006, 06:21 PM

Originally Posted by Michelle

Yep--my dh has experienced that as well. Legally I'm sure they can't force him, but for work etiquette purposes he *has* to participate. It reflects negatively on him if he doesn't.

And yes, I agree it's horrible and a shame that it has to be that way.

Same with my dh.

**Nada.Leona** · 12-11-2006, 03:01 PM

I'd do something homemade, like a tin of cookies or loaves of bread or a nice craft. It's secret Santa, so no one has to know your DH brought in home baked goodies.

**PAVallygrl** · 12-11-2006, 06:05 PM

Just wondering on what the "Boss" plans on giving his employees for Christmas that he is imposing on.

Sorry, but over the years I used to give, give, give and I know the idea is not to give and expect to receive, but after enough years of doing so, and now having a mortgage and other bills to pay everyone now gets a card. Yup that's it.....really really close people get a tin of homemade cookies nd if they don't like it I don't mind if they "re-gift"

**britbunny** · 12-12-2006, 06:07 AM

[QUOTE=PAVallygrl;648819]Just wondering on what the "Boss" plans on giving his employees for Christmas that he is imposing on.

QUOTE]

From his previous employees we've heard that he's the kind of boss that ducks out of the party before he even buys anyone a drink!

DH is taking some homemade stuff to the Jacob's Join next Wednesday, most people just buy something but I think we'll make some cranberry cookies and a quiche or something.