just had to vent

**halloweenfreak** · 12-20-2007, 02:38 PM

its gotten to the point where i hate when christmas rolls around cuz i know im going to have to deal with family procrastination. my mil ALWAYS has her christmas the sunday before christmas. my family ALWAYS has christmas on christmas eve. my fil..... you never know with him. we called at the begining of december to see when we were going to get together, he didn't know. we have called every week since then, hinting that we'd like to do it at our house christmas eve around noon. that would give us plenty of time to do our thing and then get to my familys house. well now we hear that his girlfriend is working christmas eve until noon and they just dont know when they'll be able to get over here, hopefully they can be there sometime that afternoon. but they're not sure.

we cant do it christmas day because my husbands neices will be at their dads house so thats out of the question. it just makes me want to throw my hands up in the air and say forget the whole thing. i just feel that if they wanted to get together, they would put a little more thought and effort into it instead of waiting until 4 days before and still giving us an 'i dont know we'll get there when we get there'. after 7 years of doing this, im just tired of the whole thing. am i being unreasonable??

**Izzy0906** · 12-20-2007, 02:58 PM

i don't think you are. I'm the same way. Mine is a little different. My ex waits until LAST MINUTE to let me know when he's getting her and dropping her off etc... (we share both Christmas eve and christmas with her) and I had it this year. I told him Monday that if he didn't give me an answer and times, then he would get her when he got her and he didn't have a choice. That got him moving. I hope things work out!

**Darlene** · 12-20-2007, 03:10 PM

Nope, not unreasonable. When they finally do come up with a time smile and say, oh I'm sorry, we didn't hear back from you and made other plans....maybe sometime after the holiday would be better for you.

You've tried to include them, now just move on without them, enjoy & don't look back. jmho

**FrugalMomof3** · 12-20-2007, 03:47 PM

Your not unreasonable at all, I got the same response from my step-daughter yesterday (the oldest one) and I am not going to sit around and wait for her, I made plans with my mom and my kids so if she would make up her mind, it would help but otherwise... oh well, there are other days.

**Dancing Lotus** · 12-20-2007, 04:05 PM

I think you have a right to just make your own plans and tell everyone what you are doing. If they make it great , if not then see ya later!

I have had enough for doing what everyone else wants to do.

**monkeymia** · 12-20-2007, 11:09 PM

Family can be very frustrating, you aren't being unreasonable. You have asked and given times so make your own plans.

**Michelle68** · 12-20-2007, 11:18 PM

My DB is the same way, and so I don't blame you at all for being upset. I've just gotten to the point where I don't try to plan around him. If he shows up, fine. If not...oh well.

--Michelle

**Libby** · 12-24-2007, 01:49 AM

Originally Posted by Darlene

Nope, not unreasonable. When they finally do come up with a time smile and say, oh I'm sorry, we didn't hear back from you and made other plans....maybe sometime after the holiday would be better for you.

You've tried to include them, now just move on without them, enjoy & don't look back. jmho

I sooooo agree with Ms Darlene here. Its not like you've not given them any opportunity to look into their shedules and get back to you and its not like you gave them short notice either. You waited a reasonable amount of time and now you can go ahead and plan YOUR Christmas. If they wish to be a part of it they will have to put forth an effort and try right?