Expenses, Please Review

**Shelli_wnj** · 04-30-2009, 04:56 PM

OK, I have been posting all over the place (sorry) trying to get ideas on various areas of my finances. I decided (with some encouragement) to just post the expenses and let people comment as they may. I need advice, encouragement, etc! Thanks.

When reviewing, please remember that hubby neither lives with us or is on board for the TMMO. So as far as his expenses are concerned, I am not sure there is anything I can do. We are separated. It has always been (and still is) that he makes the money and I manage it. This was the plan ever since our kids were born. I always managed the money, but I used to make some, too :-)

All payments are listed as monthly

Mortgage - $1152
Student Loan - $159 (we will be able to pay this off with the tax return - I owe $800)
Electric - $246
Cell Phone - $130 (lowest we can get it - contracted and hubby uses a lot of minutes!)
Car Payment - $264. (car is worth about $5,000 less than we owe)
Cable - $65 (as low as we can get it - also contracted)
Life Insurances - $56
Auto Insurance - $161
Association Fees - $70 (We also owe the last 2 years worth - a total of $1700, we will pay this with the remainder of the tax return)
EMS - $4.17 (I don't technically have to pay this, but if I don't, and we need their services, it's around $500. So I consider it insurance)
Oil Changes - $20
Groceries - $200 (Includes prescriptions, hba, pretty much anything you can get at walmart.
Gas (my car) - $120
Hubby's Expenses - $480.

Anything not listed we don't have/use (that I can think of, anyway). For example, I cut all our hair, so haircuts isn't in there. We get clothes secondhand, so those aren't in there either. I didn't include the internet - today is our last day with internet - from here on out, I will be on the forums once a week from the library.

That puts us at a grand total of around $3130 a month, our income is generally $2500 a month. So as you can see, we are under! Suggestions welcome!!!

**forHISglory** · 04-30-2009, 05:23 PM

Electric seems very high to me. Of course, I don't know the norm for your area. But I would try my very best to find the energy phantoms, and do what I can to cut this bill drastically.

I also would get rid of cable. I could not justify this at all with past due bills (like association fees) hanging over your head.

Groceries seem very reasonable; I commend you on this.

What exactly are Hubby's expenses? And can the mortgage be renegotiated to a lower rate?

Some things to keep in mind: If you are separated or divorced, the income doesn't go as far, as it has to support two homes and not just one. Also, if things progress to divorce, and not just separation, what will happen to your income? You probably need to be saving like crazy and getting expenses down to bare bones in view of that.

**mommy4ever** · 04-30-2009, 05:23 PM

You are separated? What are your plans for income should that remain a permanent situation? How are bills being dealt with? Is he paying for both households?

Personally, I don't think your mortgage payment is that high, you'll be paying that or more to accommodate your little ones.

So you'll be paying off the 2 debts besides mortgage off shortly. You're doing pretty good!

Now to make it balance... Other than cable, cell phone, I don't see where else you can cut back. So is there a way you can earn the difference to balance the budget? I know it's hard with little ones(I have 4), but sometimes there's no way around it.

Once those 2 things are paid off, there's a shortfall of just under $500. Can you take in a couple kids and offer childcare? Can you work around dh hours and take on a part time job? Can you offer other services, alterations, shopping for the elderly, etc a few times a week?

Sorry it's a hard time for you

Hopefully things get better for everyone soon.

**TigerGirl1226** · 04-30-2009, 05:27 PM

When you say "hubby's expenses", is that his living expenses, what does it include? That $480 is a big number that would put you a ton closer to your income. Also, as much ad it may not be fun getting rid of the cable may help also.

I know it is hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel, but it will get better. As I keep telling my husband, "Things are gonna suck for a while, but then it will get better."

**Cricketlegs** · 04-30-2009, 05:46 PM

Hi, please take my post kindly, written word can sound so mean and snippy but trust me I want to help you and ENCOURAGE you and certainly I do NOT want to tear you down.

okay, you are $630 on the wrong side.

That is NOT good. You are not a little beyond your means you are WAY out of your means.

What they means is you can not afford to live the way you live.

I do understand there are marital issues at play and that you can not make someone else do what you want them to do esp. when it comes to the finances.

So let me ask a few questions...

1. Student loan--you have aplan to pay it off and that is GREAT. WIll your dh go along with that? Will you commit 100% to paying it off? When do you get your return?

$630-$159=$461

The electric bill--sounds high,can you find a way to reduce it any?

Cable--if I was on the wrong side of my budget it would be gone. The kiddos can watch dvds and you can get a converter box.

$461-$65=$396

What do you drive and can you cut back on your trips. I spend $60 a month and drive a 2005 Impala

It looks like you don't have a landline so you need your cell due to your childs health as well as the EMS service.

You might cut the life insurance if that is an option.

$396-$56=$340

The only other thing I see is maybe cutting $50 from the grocery money and finding better food deals(which I bet you probably are stretched thin).

$340-$50=$290

Wish I had some other suggestions. Hang in there and I will be thinking about you and hoping your situation improves.

**Shelli_wnj** · 04-30-2009, 05:54 PM

Originally Posted by forHISglory

Electric seems very high to me. Of course, I don't know the norm for your area. But I would try my very best to find the energy phantoms, and do what I can to cut this bill drastically.
I just started unplugging EVERYTHING!!! LOL I didn't realize that things like the cable box or the tv were a draw. So hopefully it will go down. Over the winter we have electric heat, so they put us on the budget plan, it's the same year-round until they adjust for higher/lower usage than this time last year.
I also would get rid of cable. I could not justify this at all with past due bills (like association fees) hanging over your head.
It's contracted - it would cost more to get rid of it than keep it.
Groceries seem very reasonable; I commend you on this.
Thanks!
What exactly are Hubby's expenses? And can the mortgage be renegotiated to a lower rate?
Hubby states his expenses are gas and cigarettes, but I think he's eating out. He lives with his parents, he could eat there. The mortgage cannot be renegotiated because we are in bankruptcy.
Some things to keep in mind: If you are separated or divorced, the income doesn't go as far, as it has to support two homes and not just one. Also, if things progress to divorce, and not just separation, what will happen to your income? You probably need to be saving like crazy and getting expenses down to bare bones in view of that.

As far as divorce, I will be able to work come september when 2 of the 3 kids are in school. the youngest qualifies for subsidized child care, so I pray that I will be able to find a job. Of course, there is alimony and child support, but I know these things cannot always be counted on. I wish I could save!!! I pray that I will be able to soon. THANK YOU SO MUCH for caring about me!!!

Originally Posted by mommy4ever

You are separated? What are your plans for income should that remain a permanent situation? How are bills being dealt with? Is he paying for both households?
As I said above, I plan to work starting at the upcoming school year. He is paying for us and living at his parents right now.
Personally, I don't think your mortgage payment is that high, you'll be paying that or more to accommodate your little ones.
That's what I thought. Rent could cost as much or more.
So you'll be paying off the 2 debts besides mortgage off shortly. You're doing pretty good!
Thanks!!!
Now to make it balance... Other than cable, cell phone, I don't see where else you can cut back. So is there a way you can earn the difference to balance the budget? I know it's hard with little ones(I have 4), but sometimes there's no way around it.

Once those 2 things are paid off, there's a shortfall of just under $500. Can you take in a couple kids and offer childcare? Can you work around dh hours and take on a part time job? Can you offer other services, alterations, shopping for the elderly, etc a few times a week?
Hubby lives in another state, around 2.5 hours away, so split shifts is out of the question. I thought about offering services, but don't know how to market it. Could you suggest anything??? :-)
Sorry it's a hard time for you

Hopefully things get better for everyone soon.

Thanks!!!

Thank you guys for the wonderful suggestions. My :answers: are in red, can you respond back?? I know this is a forum and not a conversation, but I appreciate anything you can suggest!!!

**Shelli_wnj** · 04-30-2009, 06:03 PM

Originally Posted by Cricketlegs

Hi, please take my post kindly, written word can sound so mean and snippy but trust me I want to help you and ENCOURAGE you and certainly I do NOT want to tear you down.
Thank you. I, too know that the written word is hard to interperet, but I asked for suggestions, and you gave some VERY good ones.
1. Student loan--you have aplan to pay it off and that is GREAT. WIll your dh go along with that? Will you commit 100% to paying it off? When do you get your return?
Yes. This is one thing he accepts and I am committed to it. We should get the return in about 6 weeks. There was a problem processing the return, they called today to tell me.

The electric bill--sounds high,can you find a way to reduce it any?
Please Read above post.
Cable--if I was on the wrong side of my budget it would be gone. The kiddos can watch dvds and you can get a converter box.
It's contracted and would cost more to cancel than to keep.

What do you drive and can you cut back on your trips. I spend $60 a month and drive a 2005 Impala
I have a caravan, we don't drive much. Church, library, the doctors. The doctor's is a biggie because her specialists are about 1.5 hours away.

You might cut the life insurance if that is an option.
I might, but I would be worried, what if something happened?

The only other thing I see is maybe cutting $50 from the grocery money and finding better food deals(which I bet you probably are stretched thin).
I could probably do this. The kiddos would complain, but so what?

Wish I had some other suggestions. Hang in there and I will be thinking about you and hoping your situation improves.

THANK YOU!!! I value your input!!!

**mommy4ever** · 04-30-2009, 06:13 PM

I have ideas for that, I'll get back to you as I have to get dinner going, but I'll post tomorrw

**ladykemma2** · 04-30-2009, 06:44 PM

ditto the cable.

i understand you have electric heat. have you unplugged everything and put microwave, tv, etc, on power strips? i saw an immediate savings of 100 a month doing this. i also became vigilant about everything electric and potential wastage.

your grocery bill is fine leave it alone.

if dave were conseling you he would say take care of the four walls: house, utilities, transportation, and food. all else can wait. a divorce is a crisis. so what if the cable doesn't get paid.

**kita** · 04-30-2009, 10:56 PM

Have you looked at summer day camps for the two older ones? The prices are often better than daycare so it might make sense to try to find work for the summer.
Even if you found something temp for a month before the summer it would make one more month balance out...

I left a post about renting out your basement on another post.
Advertise in a "penny paper" or Craig's list for babysitting. Offer babysitting for the summer. Find out the legal limit for watching kids in your state. Also make sure you are using any goverment assistance available.

Have you looked into Angel Food ministries? It might shave a few pennies off the grocery budget. Look for a place to sell some things. If you look at it like this it might help:

Budget shortfall of $630 month of April
$500 May
$500 June
$500 Aug
So you need to find just over $2100 if you can get a job in September.

I would not pay off the student loan. I would ask for a forbearance. It may seem crazy but if you can just get that 6 months of out from under that bill, you can pay it off when you have a job. You can "have your cake and eat it too" cut that $159 dollars out of the worst of the budget months.

So then the shortfall would be $470 May
$470 June
$470 July
$470 Aug
$1880 shortfall

The $800 which would have paid for the rest of the studen loan I would apply towards this shortfall. Could your husband live on $20 less a month? There is another $80. I would see if you can only pay half of the back association fees. $850. That means that you would then have just a $150 shortfall for the four months. I don't know how having all that money "laying around" would affect your bankruptcy. If it would be a problem you might try paying a month ahead on your mortgage . (not going to principal, right now you have to look at getting from one end of the month to the next.)

And why aren't the association fees under the bankruptcy? I am not really in favor of bankruptcy in general, but I think that sometimes it is needed.

I hope you are seeing a light at the end of the tunnel.

**Shelli_wnj** · 04-30-2009, 11:14 PM

Originally Posted by kita

Have you looked at summer day camps for the two older ones? The prices are often better than daycare so it might make sense to try to find work for the summer.
Even if you found something temp for a month before the summer it would make one more month balance out...

Good idea - I have to check that out.

I left a post about renting out your basement on another post.
Advertise in a "penny paper" or Craig's list for babysitting. Offer babysitting for the summer. Find out the legal limit for watching kids in your state. Also make sure you are using any goverment assistance available.

I did see your other post. I hadn't thought about Craigslist - good idea. I am not much on the babysitting, I have to pray on that one! :-) I am using whatever assistance they will give me. Because I am still technically married, his income is my income, and it's more than the "poor" limit.

Have you looked into Angel Food ministries? It might shave a few pennies off the grocery budget. Look for a place to sell some things. If you look at it like this it might help:

Angel Food seems to come out to more than I pay at the store, and we wouldn't use all they put in the boxes.

Budget shortfall of $630 month of April
$500 May
$500 June
$500 Aug
So you need to find just over $2100 if you can get a job in September.

I would not pay off the student loan. I would ask for a forbearance. It may seem crazy but if you can just get that 6 months of out from under that bill, you can pay it off when you have a job. You can "have your cake and eat it too" cut that $159 dollars out of the worst of the budget months.

What's a forbearance?

So then the shortfall would be $470 May
$470 June
$470 July
$470 Aug
$1880 shortfall

And why aren't the association fees under the bankruptcy? I am not really in favor of bankruptcy in general, but I think that sometimes it is needed.
The association fees are like property tax - anything "land" associated falls with the house which we are keeping, so it's taken out of the bankruptcy. We have to pay it all or they can sell the house at auction
I hope you are seeing a light at the end of the tunnel.

We are seeing that light, it's just a little too far off!!! :-)

**Contrary Housewife** · 04-30-2009, 11:25 PM

A forbearance on a student loan is a grace period where you don't have to pay off the loan if you are experiencing a financial crisis. Somewhere on your loan paperwork is a customer service number. Call them and tell them you can't afford to pay, you are separated, unemployed, and going through bankruptcy. They'll get you started.

A word of advice when dealing with Sallie Mae (I assume that is who has your student loan)... just like in college keep notes, ask for everything in writing, and take names.

And I agree that you should default on the cable. It will be years before they let you sign up again, but at this point the dollar savings is important. With a bankruptcy on your credit report the cable company mark is trivial.

**Shelli_wnj** · 05-12-2009, 07:20 PM

Well, the bankruptcy should be going through - we had the hearing on wednesday and all looks well for filing. I am bittersweet about this - I don't want to "run out" on our debts, but there is no way we would have been able to pay them. Besides, the insurance company should have paid them! That's a story for another day...

As for expenses - apparently we can't cancel the internet just yet, it seems we are contracted to that as well. So I am trying to drive less, but that isn't going so well either with all the doctors appointments. I do have a few leads on employment, but no interviews as of yet.

OK - Halfway through writing this post my estranged hubby called me. He lives with his parents and us in the house. He visits to see the kids on Saturdays, so he is appraised of the situation, not just a run-out, if you understand. He decided he's ON BOARD with Dave Ramsey!!! :-) I am so excited I can't even tell you. He's going to evaluate his spending and see if he can cut anywhere, and he wants to try and help me balance the budget. He even "allowed" me to start looking for a job.

Anytime I have ever mention getting a job he would tell me I already had one, which is taking care of the kids. I argued that while that is what I want to do, I can't because we need the money right now. I realize I don't need his permission to get a job, but to me it means we might be just that one step closer to a reconciliation! :-)

**kita** · 05-12-2009, 07:25 PM

I don't know if that means you are closer reconciliation or not...but using the same book finanially means a more sane life for you...together or apart.