Helping the Parents.....

**sleepyjim** · 09-26-2009, 10:27 AM

I got them on a budget and sadly they can not meet basic living on their income (SSI only). so to help them my sister and I are giving weekly, but there is still no money to make min payments on their 4 credit cards (they was living on them, till maxed).

I got them paying $25 a week to each card, I know the companies will sue but I see no alternative......

Anyone got any ideas?

Oh and BK will not happen cause the parents rather die than do that.....

As for the budget I got them building their EF and everything else (not CC's) is covered.

SJ

PS they also have zero insurance and at 73/70 it is a shame.....

**cissylu** · 09-26-2009, 10:34 AM

I`m so sorry this has happen to them. Bless there hearts, and yours. I`m sure this is hard on all of you.
I wish I had answers to help you, but I don`t . But I`m sure some one will.

**nwdeb** · 09-26-2009, 12:17 PM

My first thoughts are applying for food stamps and medicare/medicaid. My second thought was to contact and set up an appt. w/ a local consumer credit counseling service (or two) and see what they may be able to do for your folks.

Also, the United Way in your area may be able to point you to more resources.

**Thevail** · 09-26-2009, 02:35 PM

It's a shame about the bankruptcy thing. Not that bankruptcy is ever to be wished for, but honestly.. if they can't make the payments.. they can't.

**NewLeaf** · 09-26-2009, 04:37 PM

The idea about food stamps is a good one. Contact your local social services for more help like fuel assistance, health insurance and ask about local food banks. You can also ask your local church about help or a food bank. There is the SHARE or Angel Food program. Don't give up, keep asking and searching. People , especially the elderly don't deserve to have to live this way. There are Older Citizens associations and centers too. Ask at the library- they also can point you to resources. The Health Department can help with some basic health and dental care. Just get a note book and start making these calls. Ask your pharmacist about help paying for medication. And last but not least, start couponing - it really does ease the burden of grocery shopping. Good luck and please let us know if you find any help- I will be praying for this.

**never2late** · 09-27-2009, 08:49 PM

I read your post yesterday and it breaks my heart.

I'm not sure what advice to offer. I think it would help if more info was known. Do they need help covering medical expenses, prescription meds? Do they own or rent?

Do they have anything they can sell to bring in some cash? If they do own their home, is it heavily mortgaged? Otherwise the idea of a reverse mortgage comes to mind.

I'm so sorry your parents find themselves in this situation at this time of their lives. Bless you and your sister for trying to help them.

**Mojjo** · 09-27-2009, 09:16 PM

This is why my FIL lives with us. He just wouldn't be able to make it on his own. Although it's wonderful to have him, especially with the kids so it works for us.

But is there a Senior Social Services agency in your area? There's a great one for us and we've used it plenty.

**sleepyjim** · 09-28-2009, 10:38 AM

WOW!

Thanks for all the support and replies......

More info, I got them with the budget (counting added $ from us kids) covering everything for basics, food, utils, Mortgage (they own, $190), car, insurances for home and car, they pay for 2 diff medicare supps which has been a blessing really, they are at the ages where doctors are regularly visited and they both are on daily meds. Mom just got screws in the ankle after falling/tripping down stairs (which I had new ones made to prevent future issues).....She is fine now and walking.

Thoughts: They do have some items to sell but will not be much cash. they car is financed ($204) but way upside down and does not book for what they owe and with no cash to make up diff, I dont see selling it....

Life ins was canceled last year (Sis and I never knew), LTC insurance would be nice but out of range for the whole family to buy.

A reverse mortgage might be good, will check into that for sure!

They are in Arizona and I have called all agencies listed for seniors, seems believe it or not, they make to much on SSI ($1981 Net total for both) to qualify for everything except the foodstamp office said they do qualify but dad said they rejected the app, I am working that.....

My biggest concern is them credit cards, while paying 25 bucks each (not the min), they will sue and win and while no "income" to take, Arizona has a dumb law allowing bank accounts to be emptied even if SSI is the only funds in the account.....Go figure.

I am sorry to ramble here, but........

I can not believe in a country as great as ours, how our seniors can not live on SSI, I sure whish I was smarter earlier so I could have helped my parents sooner....

I am in the middle east (Defense Contractor) and now am scarred to death of losing my job (Contract end, or reduced) cause it will sink the parents. I never worried about jobs, even when after getting out of the Air Force, but now I have so many more counting on me, am I selfish?

Anyway I heard there was a way that drug companies give drugs to seniors, is this true? What do I need to do? guess I need to figure what they need and contact manufacturers......

Thanks to all.

Jim

**Amanda2008** · 09-28-2009, 11:15 AM

Most United Ways are set up with this system now so try this: Call 2-1-1 it is a referal line through United Way to get people connected with the agencies that can help them. As everyone can probably understand, a lot of people are in a hard spot right now- so agencies are tight on money but if there is money 2-1-1 knows where it is. I live in central florida and work for united way and there are a couple of agencies that I know of that solely assist senior citizens.

If they are in a different area- they would need to call 2-1-1 because it is zoned for particular areas.

**never2late** · 09-28-2009, 02:45 PM

As far as prescription drugs go, I would first check with social services just in case their state has some kind of assistance. I found out last year my own mom had a $6000 balance on her credit card because she couldn't afford her meds. So sad. Since then, fortunately, our state added a program for seniors to get reduced cost meds. If one is not available in their state, make sure their doctor knows the cost of meds is an issue. Sometimes there are lower cost alternatives. I know Walmart (and I believe Walgreens?) have been advertising that they have certain meds available for $4 a month. These include some of the basic blood pressure meds, etc. Also, if their doctor knows they can't afford their meds, they may be able to get some samples periodically. Doctors are very sympathetic to prescription meds being cost prohibitive - they just need to be aware so they can work with a patient on how to keep costs lowered. Often there are lower cost alternative medications that can be tried. Sometimes drug companies will have programs for patients unable to pay (usually the really expensive meds though). Again, their doctor should be able to help with that.

As for the credit cards, have they/you contacted them to let them know about financial hardship? When calling, I would tell them that you are calling about a financial hardship and ask to speak with someone who can specifically help with that. You may be able to get lower interest rates or reduced payments. I think it's important that you just let them know about the situation; it may help prevent being sued. On that note though, absolutely, positively DO NOT give them any personal account information or allow them to make withdrawals out of their account. They have been known to help themselves to more than the amount agreed on. Just let them know you have every intention of paying, you just need them to work with you on it. You may need to have your parents call first though to give them permission to speak with you... confidentially laws and all.

Hang in there!

**sleepyjim** · 09-30-2009, 12:04 PM

Amanda & Never2Late, thank you both, I will get on it and see what I can find out.....

**kita** · 10-01-2009, 10:29 AM

Also I know of people who volunteered at hospitals etc, so that they could get a hot meal a day. (The policy was four hours of volunteering got $5 at the cafe. She knew exactly what to order so that the money stretched for two meals.)
And, are they fit enough to babysit for a couple of hours. Some working mothers might need someone to watch a school-age child after school for a few hours which might not be too taxing. Even an extra hundred a month would be a big help. Check Craig's list.

**sleepyjim** · 10-02-2009, 05:35 AM

Amanda, no 2-1-1 in the parents area, thanks for the idea anyway.

Kita, that is a good idea and will talk to them after moms fully walking again.

Jim

**larabelle** · 10-04-2009, 08:00 AM

Just a couple tips off the top of my head.
1.)Did either of your parents serve in the armed forces? If so they might qualify for veterans benefits. They do not need to have a lifetime career in the military to qualify for veterans benefits even if they only served two years they would still qualify.
2) I agree with another poster in that your parents should ask their doctor to change their medications to those which qualify for Walmarts $4.00 for ninety days program.
3.) Do your parents have public transportation in their city? If so maybe they could obtain a bus/train pass it would decrease their costs related to automobile wear/tear and gas prices.

**Holding Pattern** · 10-06-2009, 03:15 PM

Originally Posted by NewLeaf

The idea about food stamps is a good one. Contact your local social services for more help like fuel assistance, health insurance and ask about local food banks. You can also ask your local church about help or a food bank. There is the SHARE or Angel Food program. Don't give up, keep asking and searching. People , especially the elderly don't deserve to have to live this way. There are Older Citizens associations and centers too. Ask at the library- they also can point you to resources. The Health Department can help with some basic health and dental care. Just get a note book and start making these calls. Ask your pharmacist about help paying for medication. And last but not least, start couponing - it really does ease the burden of grocery shopping. Good luck and please let us know if you find any help- I will be praying for this.

NewLeaf is spot on... SHARE or Angel Food are wonderful programs!