Need a little cheese with this whine

**ddmartin** · 10-13-2011, 12:10 PM

Let me say right off the top that I know that I'm whining, perhaps jealous, and a little annoyed but . . .

My nephew and his live in girl friend quit making payments on their house around a year ago. They are staying in the house and saving money until the house gets sold, it's listed as a short sale. Last week they were bragging that they have $10,000 in the bank which they will use as a down payment on a house. The house is in his name so they will buy the next one in her name.

Any other stories out there of someone 'working the system'?

**Samigirl** · 10-13-2011, 12:29 PM

Uhhh....I wouldn't be envious of someone who hasn't the scruples to do the right thing. A short sale out of hardship should hold no shame, but a short sale out of convenience is disgraceful.

**khaski** · 10-13-2011, 06:43 PM

I agree- no need to be jealous of someone's unethica; actions! Be proud of YOU for not doing such things.....

**mndtrp** · 10-13-2011, 06:58 PM

This is hardly "working the system". This is "abusing the system", "shirking responsibilities" and pretty much boils down to "stealing".

I would never be jealous of their situation.

**nuisance26** · 10-13-2011, 08:04 PM

~I know someone who is trying to do exactly this. It makes me sad because these people don't seem to think they're hurting anyone by doing this since it's a bank that takes the loss.
But a bank is people who need paychecks for their work and investors who were promised interest for their loans and taxpayers who funded the bail-outs.
It's frustrating how selfish people can be. Bad behavior by some makes a ripple that is felt by everyone through higher interest rates and fees for loans, more difficulty obtaining loans, less interest earned on savings and higher taxes.
Don't banks consider a spouse's debt when issuing loans? This scamming would stop if new loans couldn't be obtained in one spouse's name if the other spouse has walked away from debts. ~

**krbshappy71** · 10-17-2011, 10:52 AM

Good luck with that!

Their behaviors wont change just because they've found an "out" for now. They'll be in a similar situation not long from now with the next house and will likely either stare at each other wondering what happened or blame each other for it.

I wouldn't bother trying to talk sense into them, it will only fall on deaf ears, they clearly know it all already.

As someone who fails to listen often,

--krbshappy71

**frugalwarrior2** · 10-17-2011, 11:38 AM

nuisance26-girlfriend not spouse. Hence the diff.

The thing that gets me is people used to feel this kind of behavior was shameful not hilarious or something to be proud of!
As someone who has done it right by sacrificing I just get furious at this kinda crap. I had a friend years ago that ran out and charged a bunch of stuff just before they filed. Asked her DH if he "wanted" anything like some new shoes." Might as well our credits going do be trashed anyway." And you just don't understand your Dh MAKES good money.
No I would have a hard time not smacking them but jealous-not so much! never be jealous of someone w/o values or integrity.

**pollypurebred39** · 10-17-2011, 12:11 PM

Hmmm...Well, this does not sound any different to me then big wigs finding loop holes to get out of doing the right thing. I suppose they could argue that if they can do it, so can we. The sense of right and wrong, what's ethical, and what's moral is completely askew in this country.

Big or small it's WRONG, and they WILL reap what they sow. Let go of any jealousy that may be hidden in your heart, root it out and smash it. It's far better to stand upright and blameless.

Fret Not Thyself Because of Evildoers, Neither Be Thou Envious

**Preston** · 10-19-2011, 09:19 PM

Somehow I doubt there is a mortgage company who will approve this loan... just with all the paperwork and extra regulation I have a feeling they won't get what they want and it will catch up with them.

And they will never know wealth. They'll always be leaping from check to check as long as they want to act like 12 year olds.

**gmarie** · 10-22-2011, 02:25 PM

Originally Posted by ddmartin

Let me say right off the top that I know that I'm whining, perhaps jealous, and a little annoyed but . . .

My nephew and his live in girl friend quit making payments on their house around a year ago. They are staying in the house and saving money until the house gets sold, it's listed as a short sale. Last week they were bragging that they have $10,000 in the bank which they will use as a down payment on a house. The house is in his name so they will buy the next one in her name.

Any other stories out there of someone 'working the system'?

Sometimes, I am a *tiny* bit jealous of people with no morals or who cheat the system, because I think maybe it would be easier to go through life without my conscience and guilt that I feel when I don't do the right thing.

A girl at work is begging her mom to buy her a house. I wish I had the guts to tell her exactly how I feel, but I don't. I don't need an enemy in the office! Regardless, I am sure I will be a tiny bit jealous if she does get this house.

Now, on to more productive things: putting in a few hours of work on my day off so I can get of debt and someday buy my own house!!

**khaski** · 10-25-2011, 07:22 AM

This reminds me of some good friends of mine I tend to be jealous of....recently they took a weekend down in NYC to go to the ComicCon convention. Boy, was I jealous- I would love a weekend away! But then in conversation it comes out all 3 of their cars need major repairs, they don't know how they'll be able to order heating oil or wood for the wood stove as they need both shortly, things are just a mess financially. they often do 'fun' expensive things while acting irresponsibly towards their day to day needs. So yes, I wish we could pick up and go away for a weekend, but I enjoy knowing our household things are all in order instead. It's easy to look at them on the surface and be jealous, but if you know the reality behind it, it's all smoke and mirrors, they're crumbling behind the scenes. Easy to become jealous if we don't take a moment to look at the whole picture!

**GirlBoyGirl** · 11-14-2011, 06:19 PM

There is another forum I go on full of people doing this. (I was trying to find a forum to ask questions about loan modifications)

If they short sale the house, won't your nephew be responsible for paying taxes on the difference?

Well anyway don't be too jealous, this will all catch up with them.

**cottageliving** · 11-18-2011, 08:40 PM

I agree with the others: don't be jealous. You are making morally and ethically strong choices in your life rather than ripping people and companies off.
A few observations:
1: they may not find a buyer as quickly as they think, even if listed as a short sale. A lot of buyers stay away from short sales because they fear something might be wrong with the house.
2: The Bank and loan investor may not agree to the short sale amount that someone is willing to pay for the house. Very few short sales go through.
3: your nephew will need to pay income tax on the amount of the debt forgiven by the bank. (another posted mentioned this as well)
4: you nephew has-and continues to- ruin his credit on purpose so he can save up $10,000 to buy a house IN SOMEONE ELSE'S NAME!! he will have no rights to the new house, but he ruined his credit to get it!!!!
5: don't be jealous if things work out well for them!
6: don't feel sorry for him when he loses everything.

**Ponderer** · 11-18-2011, 08:54 PM

Originally Posted by gmarie

Sometimes, I am a *tiny* bit jealous of people with no morals or who cheat the system, because I think maybe it would be easier to go through life without my conscience and guilt that I feel when I don't do the right thing.

A girl at work is begging her mom to buy her a house. I wish I had the guts to tell her exactly how I feel, but I don't. I don't need an enemy in the office! Regardless, I am sure I will be a tiny bit jealous if she does get this house.

Now, on to more productive things: putting in a few hours of work on my day off so I can get of debt and someday buy my own house!!

I bought my first house in April of 2009 as a 43 year old single mom. It was the most amazing feeling and I would not have traded it for being handed one....and I mean that. I feel blessed every single day and love living in it!

You just keep fighting the good fight because the feeling of accomplishment is amazing!!

**Janbee** · 11-19-2011, 07:22 PM

I to have suffered from a little thing called financial jealousy. I have a friend at work that her and her husband took lots of trips and did lots of things and then he lost his job and they filed bankruptcy . He made to much money to have it all forgiven so he just didn't look for work for almost a year so that they could get out of paying anything. Now they have divorced and her money is all hers no payments I still am struggling to pay all my bills off and sometimes I look at her with envy. She buys new clothes and still goes on trips and I just go to work and pay bills.

Get some more cheese as I have sure used the whine

.

All that to say I know what you mean!!!