Frustrated - Hit a Wall...

**Holding Pattern** · 11-19-2009, 04:00 PM

Things were going along so nicely...the debt snowball worked wonderfully...then the life snowball took a run at us.
We have only about 5k in debt...the house is paid off. I know we're quite lucky. I'm starting off with the good things because my perspective is lost...

My wife's vision has dropped to half of where it was a year ago, 20/400 now. A fairly quick drop that wasn't supposed to happen... I know "supposed to" Doctor bills have been outrageous and frequent not to mention the emotional toll.

I've had some unexplained medical issues that I have not really kept my wife updated on because she will worry. It's nothing serious, I don't think

Our vehicle just took $400 in necessary, immediate repairs that we could not do - broken rocker arm & such.

We both had toothaches, seems a root canal is a coming necessity for each of us.

My pay was cut

Benefits cut too, not cut as in gone but as in over 1/3 of my monthly pay for a crap plan.

Tax bill will be coming soon and our EF is on life support.

We're not even thinking about Christmas but we can't get any family to agree to not exchange gifts, they're already upset that we want to "cancel Christmas"

Thanks for reading...I don't even know if there is a response to give but it helps to vent here. There's more but I won't bore everyone with all the details...

You may now exit stage right...

**Contrary Housewife** · 11-19-2009, 04:47 PM

Wow. That's a load to deal with.

Get a 2nd opinion on the root canals. I've met more than a few dentists who love to do unnecessary work. I had one tell me my brand new crown needed replacement immediately or I'd lose the tooth. Well, 6 years later I still have it, with no problems.

Christmas... don't try to talk folks out of giving you a gift. They will want to do this whether you can reciprocate or not. Just explain that things are rough for you, and wish everyone a good new year with a cheerful card.

**shoiji** · 11-19-2009, 06:01 PM

Well you definately are at the right place. Many of us have gone or are going thru the same thing. I do hope that everything starts to calm down for you. The holidays alone can be stressful.

Try not to be pressured to give presents. If you can't do it, you can't do it. Try the Christmas section. Sara Noel started a great thread on free to up to $5 gift ideas.

Just remember you are not alone and any time you need to get something off your chest. Go ahead.

**piney** · 11-19-2009, 07:33 PM

Sorry for all the bad things that happening to you both,hope things get better real soon.

**Debbie-cat** · 11-19-2009, 08:21 PM

Sorry to hear that things are rough right now. I hope everything turns around real soon. Hang in there.

**NikoSan999** · 11-19-2009, 08:33 PM

As for Christmas, let them be upset. Do what you feel is right for you and your wife. They are not walking in your shoes.
As for the financial problems the only thing I see is vehicle, meaning one I assume, and if you have to go to work, although if I rember correctly you work from home, you still need a vehicle. It needs fixed or no transportation. That's what an emergency fund is for.
Other than that I can't say anything. We all need to start a club called " Welcome to the new real world". And that dosen't mean the world as our government, Wall Street, CEO's and bank presidents know it.
My heart goes out to you and your wife.

**Thevail** · 11-19-2009, 08:41 PM

About the health insurance...

depending on how much/what it covers seriously think about cancelling it and just putting that 1/3 of the paycheck into the EF.

I know this sounds nuts, but I've had a couple of friends do this and it's really worked well for them..

I mean, if you pay $500/mo for insurance (not unusual
and have a $1000 deductible per person (not that unusual)
And it doesn't have good coverage for dental and optical (also not unusual)

You're much better off to save the $6,000 per year in one of those flexible medical accounts than to be $2000 in debt before the insurance kicks in.

Check into a private (or through your work) major medical plan which basically covers only stuff that hospitalizes you. It's usually a lot cheaper.

**Imarachne** · 11-19-2009, 09:07 PM

You can only do what you can do--don't worry about what others think--take a step ahead today and another tomorrow. We understand and are rooting for you. It helps to vent !

**craftypam** · 11-19-2009, 09:53 PM

Originally Posted by Thevail

About the health insurance...

depending on how much/what it covers seriously think about cancelling it and just putting that 1/3 of the paycheck into the EF.

I know this sounds nuts, but I've had a couple of friends do this and it's really worked well for them..

I mean, if you pay $500/mo for insurance (not unusual
and have a $1000 deductible per person (not that unusual)
And it doesn't have good coverage for dental and optical (also not unusual)

You're much better off to save the $6,000 per year in one of those flexible medical accounts than to be $2000 in debt before the insurance kicks in.

Soooo sorry you are going through such a struggle now!

Check into a private (or through your work) major medical plan which basically covers only stuff that hospitalizes you. It's usually a lot cheaper.

When it comes to ins everybody is entitled to do what they want, but you never know when you are going to have a health problem. I am not just talking about this. We have been paying our own health ins for over 30 years. If you ever have a serious health issue you will have serious financial hardship w/o health ins. I know it is hard to pay, we struggled many, many years to pay it, but I had to have a kidney transplant and we would now be owing several thousand dollars w/o health ins.