Ever have those nights of insomnia due to the budget?

**MomToTwoBoys** · 12-28-2011, 02:12 AM

I'm having that right now.

Well, part of it might be indigestion, but the budget certainly was at the forefront of my thoughts.

I sent out an email to the guy who set us up with mortgage protection on the house and now I'm waiting to hear back from him about it. I'll be calling the cable company tomorrow morning and requesting that the package be reduced to digital basic with a $5 addon (which will still be $50 cheaper than it is now). I went ahead and removed two addons we had on the cell phones for now... one of which was $12 a month and the other was $8 a month, so we'll see improvements on that starting Jan 2nd. Other than that, we have nothing much else to cut.

We got a letter of reassessment about the taxes last week and we'll be experiencing some changes in the income due to it. I'm not sure how much it'll be right now, but I'm bracing for that too.

DH is four weeks smoke free! He's doing great now, though he still craves salt and the popcorn sort of helps a bit with that.

The other big thing we have to worry about right now is the credit card bill. We'll be receiving a biannual payment which is going to all go onto the credit card, but the balance is still over $7k. Oy. This is why I want to go back to work.

But as of now, we're in full lockdown with variable spending. We're a month behind with all expenses, which is not good. But, it's not bad either. We can slowly catch up and take it easy. My anxiety doesn't like it, but it's the best that we can do.

I would say that this is the worst shape that we've been in in a very, very long time. DH's work disability really hit us hard and if it happens again, I'm not sure what we're going to do. I've prepared myself to sell the house if need be.

Now I just have to resign myself to admitting that we've hit bottom and need to suck it up in order to move forward.

**BlissMommy** · 12-28-2011, 02:18 AM

Yes, it happens to me more than I'd like to admit. I have tried to adopt the attitude that it's one step at a time. Good cuts you are making!

**greekislandgirl** · 12-28-2011, 03:53 AM

It happens to me fairly frequently. Maybe once/week. I have a hard time falling asleep because it seems like when the light goes out, my brain goes into overdrive thinking about everything. Last night - I'm totally serious here - I fell asleep visualizing my stockpile and thinking about how long we could probably get by without spending anything on groceries. I did finally fall asleep and had a crazy dream about piloting a boat in a storm, so I guess my brain is playing metaphorical dream games with me now!

I really understand about the anxiety. I have anxiety and I get panic attacks also. I try to protect DH from the financial stuff because of his heart and depressive tendencies, so I often feel like I'm shouldering it all on my own. (He also tends to be a dreamer, saying things like "let's just leave and go work your parents' farm in the US!" which is totally insane and impossible and not even legal, so then I feel like I have to explain why we can't do that, and then he says that I'm no fun!! Ha! Of course I'm NO FUN. I stare at numbers all day and have a calculator fused to my palm! I turn the volume UP during the commercials in case there's a sale ad for the supermarket. Sorry I'm not more FUN!) Haha just a little venting.

You're not alone... insomnia, anxiety, panic, stress.

I remember when I was in my early 20s, my dad said that the first thing he thought about in the morning and the last thing he thought about at night was money. I thought that was ridiculous. But only a few years later, I'm in the same position.

**Russ** · 12-28-2011, 07:28 AM

Happens a lot when you're the only one who cares about it.

**hmcart** · 12-28-2011, 08:56 AM

It happens to me often and I am glad I am not the only one! I thought I was crazy! ha!

**khaski** · 12-28-2011, 08:59 AM

The good news is you're on the right track and sometimes, down the line, when you are debt free and have a good sized EF- those sleepless nights over money will be no more! 4 weeks smoke free- think of all the $ you 2 saved right there!

**MaryCarney** · 12-28-2011, 09:29 AM

I've been there in the past, but you are DOING something about it - which I think helps so much. ((( hugs)))

**Incognito** · 12-28-2011, 10:07 AM

After you recognize and assess the problems, don't dwell on them.
Focus on answers & solutions. One solution will lead to another solution, and the positive energy you have will help you to bear up as you work through to achieving your goals.
Count your blessings, and your achievements.

I've been worried about my under-employment; money is tight, and I've even been using my EF. So, after some thought, I've decided to cancel my internet in January, save $500 per year; and also to cancel my long-distance on my phone plan & get a calling card instead, saving at least $40 per year on LD surcharges, not to mention the calls themselves. If there's an answer, take it, and proceed. I have to survive 7 years (till my Retirement Pension), on my EF and whatever I can still earn, and $500 x 7 = $3,500 which is not going to come out of my EF. In fact, that $40 per month I now pay for internet is approximately what I need for food costs every month. So, the big decision was to end the internet bill, and asap, and start saving on that expense alone; and wise decisions are best made asap, before more time & money is wasted.

**alotofgooddeals** · 12-28-2011, 10:35 AM

I am to the point in my life that very little actually bothers me....I know that is not the way to live but....I have been to the point that i thought i would lose my house and i worried more about how dh would handle it than actually losing the house...he is very attatched, i am not! However i am not sure if it is actual attatchment or fear of the unknown....so how i handle this now is if you really don't want to move than if we run out of trash bags and the house payment needs to be made than you will have to use a grocery bag.....if the house payment needs to be made and you have no more soda than you will have to drink water. By coming to frugalvillage i now know that if we run out of laundry detergent and the house payment needs to be made than we will figure something else out....and if all else fails and i can't control the situation then it is what it is and hubby will have to deal with it...I think the point i am trying to make is.....I lived years with this stress wondering how to make the payments etc....and hubby would say i need something...and if i said no he would wine.....so of course i would give in because thats one thing i cant stand to hear is a grown man wining....I got to a point that i told him i am not your mother so if you feel the need to get something please dont ask me but when they come to take the house away or whatever don't come whining to me because it's not my fault....I never ever buy anything for myself.....so he is finally getting the picture and the stress has been relieved some and he is becoming a little more financially responsible. I am so sorry you are having a hard time with all of your situation and i guess the advice i am going to give you is there are things in life you can control and there are things you cannot and its not worth wasting time on the things you can't.....Good luck!

**ncarr** · 12-28-2011, 12:20 PM

Girl, you have come to the right person! I spend many night unable to sleep due to anxiety. Xanax helps but that's proabably not the solution you're looking for :/

**MomToTwoBoys** · 12-28-2011, 01:46 PM

I finally did get to sleep at about 12:45 but that wasn't without some more thought about things.

I -totally- slept through DH getting ready for work this morning or else I'd have asked him if he wanted to cancel the cable all together. I looked at the pricing again and there's no way that we would save much of anything by going with digital basic. Digital basic is $41 a month and we pay $85 right now, so it's not that large of a savings. I would miss out on The Walking Dead and he'd miss out on Supernatural, but I'm pretty sure we can just get the episodes on iTunes for cheaper when they come out.

I just checked my email and got a response from Jason, our mortgage specialist. He's such a nice guy...

and he told me that we could cancel the mortgage protection. I'm checking on life insurance for myself to see if it'd be worth it to get insurance. I know DH is cancelling his other bank account soon and that's the bank that has his life insurance in place.

If we get rid of the cable and the mortgage protection, that's $150 a month savings right there. With the $20 I took off the cell phones last night, it's a start

**peppermint66** · 12-28-2011, 01:54 PM

Thanks so much for this thread and the ensuingg shares and discussions! I am actually taking anti-anxiety meds due to the stress of financial hardship we are in. reading carefully and taking these things to heart! My husband doesnt want to discuss budget, bills or anything else. he just expects me to deal with it ALL and Im beyond frustrated.

**brenda67** · 12-28-2011, 01:55 PM

Originally Posted by MomToTwoBoys

I finally did get to sleep at about 12:45 but that wasn't without some more thought about things.

I -totally- slept through DH getting ready for work this morning or else I'd have asked him if he wanted to cancel the cable all together. I looked at the pricing again and there's no way that we would save much of anything by going with digital basic. Digital basic is $41 a month and we pay $85 right now, so it's not that large of a savings. I would miss out on The Walking Dead and he'd miss out on Supernatural, but I'm pretty sure we can just get the episodes on iTunes for cheaper when they come out.

I just checked my email and got a response from Jason, our mortgage specialist. He's such a nice guy...

and he told me that we could cancel the mortgage protection. I'm checking on life insurance for myself to see if it'd be worth it to get insurance. I know DH is cancelling his other bank account soon and that's the bank that has his life insurance in place.

If we get rid of the cable and the mortgage protection, that's $150 a month savings right there. With the $20 I took off the cell phones last night, it's a start

HUGS..I'm curious as to what mortgage protection is?

**alotofgooddeals** · 12-28-2011, 02:12 PM

I lived this way for years and years and years....worried when he would check the mail and see that the mortgage hadnt been paid but in reality i should not have been because he was the major contributor as to why it wasnt pai.d....my dh just use to think I was God or something because he would buy something and he would think the house payment would get made...who would have thunk I dont play that way anymore...I just couldnt handle the stress....not when something happens i just look at him and say it is what it is...He is slowly getting it....thank Goodness as on the brink of foreclosure and having to file bankruptcy almost...i think he is starting to get it....

Originally Posted by peppermint66

Thanks so much for this thread and the ensuingg shares and discussions! I am actually taking anti-anxiety meds due to the stress of financial hardship we are in. reading carefully and taking these things to heart! My husband doesnt want to discuss budget, bills or anything else. he just expects me to deal with it ALL and Im beyond frustrated.

**MomToTwoBoys** · 12-28-2011, 02:19 PM

Originally Posted by brenda67

HUGS..I'm curious as to what mortgage protection is?

It's like an additional insurance in place in case something happens to one or the both of us. It pays off the house and it would save us $12k a year. But, if I get life insurance on top of what DH has, we'd have about $500k for final expenses if the both of us die in a car accident or something.