Just took over bills, and a bit disturbed...

**Mamawolf** · 01-22-2006, 12:04 PM

DH had been doing bills since late september. He had me take over since I'm on bedrest, because he has too much stress between work taking care of me and the three kids and everything else.

Well, I was horrified at what I got!

Several small one-time bills that have never been paid from when he took over that we'd just gotten. These "small" bills add up to about $320 total. I had assumed all these were paid. Credit cards weren't paid for a few months, we cashed in an IRA to catch up, we were so far behind. In fact, one raised our rate from 19% to 30% because of it! That makes the minimum payment so ridiculously high!! The mortgage is running a month behind all the time now, because it's impossible to get it caught up, same with the phone bill. The bill for our security system hasn't been paid at all the entire time!

Soooo... here's my dilemma. If we have unexpected things come up like last week (3 people sick; dr's visits and rx's cost an entire paycheck!!) I won't be able to pay some bills. So, I was thinking of taking $10 each check into the savings, which was drained. It will delay some bills by a week, but I figured they're already so late, it won't really matter in the long run. Is that a good idea, or should I just use that $40 a month to pay off those bills? They are not gaining late fees or have interest on them.

**Darlene** · 01-22-2006, 12:11 PM

I guess the first thing I'd do is call the people you owe money and let them know what's up. They are usually more understanding when they are kept in the loop. Sorry things are so messed up and that your hubby is so overwhelmed.

Wishing for a smoother ride for you all soon.

**Kimberlina** · 01-22-2006, 12:49 PM

I would definitely call, too. People would usually half 1/2 or 1/4 payment rather than no payment or a late payment. It shows them you are trying. And if you call you CC companies, since you are behind, they might be willing to work out some deals with you.

Hope you can get things back in line soom=n so you don't have to worry about it anymore.

**homesteadmamma** · 01-22-2006, 01:39 PM

Originally posted by Darlene
I guess the first thing I'd do is call the people you owe money and let them know what's up. They are usually more understanding when they are kept in the loop. Sorry things are so messed up and that your hubby is so overwhelmed. Wishing for a smoother ride for you all soon.

I agree. It's tough sometimes making those calls, however in the long run it does pay off.

As to the $10, I would definitely put it into savings as long as you know you won't touch it unless absolutely necessary.

**AmyBoz** · 01-22-2006, 01:47 PM

No advice, just

That sounds like no fun.

**Mom23boys** · 01-22-2006, 02:16 PM

I would definately call the companies too. I hope you are able to get things back in order.

**mizniteowl** · 01-22-2006, 02:20 PM

That is what we do...call the companies first then pay about1/4 - 1/2 of the bill until it's paid off. That's what we had to do this month to get caught up from Christmas.

**Lyn5** · 01-23-2006, 06:00 PM

I know this will sound really drastic, but do you have equity in your house? have you thought about selling it and buying a cheaper home / downsizing? It just seems like you have an awlful lot of stuff going on, especially being pregnant on bed rest with 3 other littles ones. Maybe if you could sell your home and use that money to buy a smaller home and pay off what is owed it would be more relaxing. I wish you the best, please take care of you and baby

**Mamawolf** · 01-23-2006, 08:11 PM

We thought about that, but we are going to be cramped as it is with 6 in here at 1200 sq. ft. We don't have enough equity in the house to be able to purchase a smaller home without taking out a new loan, and with our credit not so hot, no one would approve us.

I'm sure I'll be able to fix this, I just think it's crazy I HAVE to fix it.

**Michelle** · 01-23-2006, 08:16 PM

Originally posted by Darlene
I guess the first thing I'd do is call the people you owe money and let them know what's up. They are usually more understanding when they are kept in the loop. Sorry things are so messed up and that your hubby is so overwhelmed. Wishing for a smoother ride for you all soon.

I agree...

**Lyn5** · 01-23-2006, 08:26 PM

On the brighter side, at least you found out about this now so that you can start making some positive changes.

**happymommy** · 01-25-2006, 11:07 AM

I wishing the best of luck. I also agree it's better you found out now and can get things back under control a day at a time.

**FrugalMomof3** · 01-25-2006, 12:48 PM

Good luck! I am sure you will figure something out but call those companies, they should be more than willing to accept something than nothing at all.

Best Wishes!

guest7 · 01-25-2006, 06:18 PM

Dh was overwhelmed... he admitted it. Poor guy. I'm certain he appreciates what you do for the household finances- otherwise, he wouldn't have given it back.
Take control... deep breathe... and don't dispair. Your health and welfare are vital here... you have a child along the way.. Keep that child safe and bring him/her to term! First and foremost.
While you are keeping that baby safe inside you, contact each creditor and make arrangements for a steady monthly payment. Be sure you make the payments on time- that's a trust thing.
As for the mortgage... please get that up to date. That can really hurt you. Take every bit of extra money you have and put it toward the mortgage- so that you are not a month behind. That's stressful. Then work on the EF of $10/wk.
Start selling things to raise money.. start saving those coins... Use your stockpile of food to carry you through so you can cut the grocery bill. Spaghetti and sauce can go a long way! soups and mac and cheese, pancakes, french toast. foods from scratch cost less to make. If you have eggs.. you've got a meal!
There are ways to cut back and scrape up to exta cash to plug away.
Write down what you owe and it's payback schedule or how you're going to get it up to date.
Whew- sorry so long. I really hope that you find a way to settle this down. Huggs for you. Keep us up to date.

**Mamawolf** · 02-18-2006, 02:24 PM

I just wanted to give an update! Thanks so much for all the positive thoughts! We've had a rough time, I was in the hospital for a few days (60% effaced, 1cm dilated at 25 weeks), and dh's mom was as well. She has advanced MS and was trying a new chemo therapy. Well, it paralyzed her from the waist down, and one of her hands. She's doing a little better now, she can hold herself in a standing position for a short time now. Baby is hanging in there! Hoping for 9 more weeks!!

Anywho... We HAD to take a little money from stocks to get caught up. Combined that with our little bit of a tax return, and careful management, we are at least caught up on everything now, and the mortgage payment is paid on time! I was so afraid after reading all the rants about BoA, because they are the ones whose minimum payments are the killer now. However, the lady I talked to was so sweet and nice. I just hope we can stay this way, lol. I feel pretty proud to have accomplished what I did, and we still have a good amount in stocks and bonds. Now I really just need to get an EF built up!