Can someone help me figure out my budget?

**ssmithson** · 11-04-2007, 11:04 PM

A little background - I am a sahm of a 15 month old and 4 month old. We live in a tiny house that we are in the process of remodeling, which is how we got into such a tight mess. My husband brings home around $345 a week. This is after taxes, insurance, 401k, child support for his daughter from previous marriage, and payroll deduction for our remodeling project. We have 10 more weeks of payroll deduct and then his check will go up an extra $80 weekly. We have absolutely no ef or even change and I am always running to keep up on the checking account so we don't go into the negative. You know, writing the house payment because its already two weeks late and praying they don't cash it for 5 more days at which point something else is already due or overdue and I have to try to get it to the next payday etc. I hope that made sense! I am always looking for ways to make extra money - ebay, yard sales, etc. I am to the point where I cannot find anything to even sell. I do have a small job working as a courier for a bank. I can take the girls with me and it takes me one hour round trip, to and from home. I get paid $50 a week for that.
Bills - House payment $225 - to my everlasting shame we have been a month behind since dd #2 was born in June.
Car pymt - $250 - one more year to go. This is my vehicle. Its a sub so a huge gas hog and I am always carefully planning my trips as to maximize my gas.
Cell phone - $195 - this is for 4 phones, my dh, mine, my fil and mil. Nothing extra except ins. We pay for my inlaws phone bill because we bought our truck #2 from them. The cell bill is what we pay instead of making pymt. Again, one more year to go on this vehicle.
Student loan - $100 - we are not able to defer this until we make 9 ontime monthly payments, which of course we CANNOT do!
Groceries - we do get WIC which helps a lot and I pack dhs lunch every day. We eat a lot of one pot meals, and crockpot beans. I try to make it as healthy as I can. No prepackaged cookies, chips or junk.
Dh's med copay is $30 monthly.
Water, sewer and trash runs about $60 a month. Which seems outrageous to me but ?
Cable internet - $30 - I justify this by getting free stuff online, doing surveys like dealbarbiepays (I make an extra $60 monthly here) and ebaying. What do you think?
Our heat is gas. We havn't had a heating bill yet but last year it ran around $150 monthly tops. I bundle the kids up all day. I fight my dh about this constantly. He wants it broiling in here. I finally broke down and told him that excessive heat contributes to SIDS (I'm sure I read that somewhere)
Electric - We are currently in a payment plan with them where I divided up our highest summer bill into 6 payments so right now its about $90 monthly what with the extra payment. I do try to unplug chargers and turn off lights.
Our highest bill is gas for the vehicles. I really can't wait to get the sub paid off so we can trade it for something cheaper on gas, especially now that gas has gone to $3 a gallon.
I do have $10 a week going directly from paycheck to ING savings account and there is $30 in there right now. I had to rob it recently to pay for some stove wire.
We don't have any credit card debt but do have terrible credit - mostly medical bills - and I eventually want to get that stuff paid. But right now I am having a hard enough time just getting the regular stuff paid. I have placed a free ad in our daily newspaper for babysitting in my home so I can stay at home with my girls. I hope that works out. I justify my not working by saying that the daycare would eat up my paycheck. Which I'm not sure is true. I do not have a degree or any special skill so I would only have an entry level job anywhere. I'm afraid my wanting to stay home is selfish and stupid. I just tried so long and hard to have these girls (6 years!) that I don't want to give up a second. I am not a complete idiot however. I know we need help. Give it to me straight!!

What do ya'll think? What can I do? Christmas is absolutely an afterthought at this moment.

Thank you for your help!!!
Stephanie

**Jenna** · 11-04-2007, 11:14 PM

Can you sell one vehicle?

**sdrjeolsen** · 11-04-2007, 11:18 PM

How much do you spend on Groceries?

electric seems a bit high, can you get off the budget plan and go strictly month to month. I think you could cut back quite a bit on that. using candles in the early evening, cooking in the crock pot, hanging laundry, etc.

By the way, I don't think you are selfish to want to stay home, I think that is a great thing to be able to do...it is true about childcare eating up your paycheck in a lot of cases, especially if you would have an entry level job/pay. I think taking in a daycare child or two is a great idea.

Any possibilities of putting the cell phone bill off for a couple of months to catch up? That is a lot of money.

What about your dh taking on a second job, many are looking for seasonal workers with the holidays approaching. Or delivering pizzas or something like that? Just to bring in a little extra to get you caught up. The end of some of the expenses is close enough that at least it doesn't have to seem like a forever thing.

Your income seems pretty low and you have 2 kids...makes me think that maybe there is some public help you can get with bills? Also maybe help with a bill or two from a church if you belong to one?

**ssmithson** · 11-04-2007, 11:27 PM

I honestly don't see how. My veh is financed through a tote your note place due to our lack of good credit. We traded in our car for it (the engine was about to go and there was a carbon monoxide problem which wasn't safe for the babies) and I don't think I could get enough out of it to pay off the loan. If we did manage to sell one then DH would drive it to work and I wouldn't be able to do my job, which I realize as I write this that I wouldn't really need to do if I didn't have the truck in the first place. I really didn't want to trade in the car which was paid for and fought my husband on it, but it would have cost 1400 to fix and it really was horrible for the kids to ride around in. We could try to sell my husbands truck but again, I don't think we could get enough out of it to pay off my inlaws. But maybe I'm not thinking hard enough. I will talk with DH about it. Its absolutely more important to me to be able to keep our house than have two vehicles. Thank you for your help!
Stephanie

**Domestic Gal** · 11-04-2007, 11:30 PM

Sounds like you would qualify for some assistance. I would try and apply for foodstamps. See if you qualify for energy asst. with your heating company.
Are you using cloth diapers?? If not this would save you alot. Even if you have to use dish towels until you can get some cloth ones.
Can you get a job on the hours your husband does not work and then you will not have to pay for daycare.
Keep plugging away at the bills and when the extra $80 gets back in the budget things should lighten up some.
I would not worry about Christmas as your children are little enough that they will not even remember it. Get them 1 small gift and call it done. Try and sign up for toys for tots and see if they can get you some gifts for them.
Sign up for a food basket for the holidays and get a holiday meal to cook. ( ask about it at wic they should know where you can sign up for these things.)

**ssmithson** · 11-05-2007, 12:09 AM

My dh is probably the biggest hurdle to getting out of this mess, God bless him. He is trying to get on at the local police dept as a backup officer for a parttime job. He is already on the fire dept and first responder team - voluntary and unpaid, of course. But the police job would be paid. So crossing fingers for that. I have a hard time asking him to get a second job when I feel so guilty for staying home. Also, he is a major spender. He wants big things and he wants them now!!! Taking his lunch instead of spending $10 a day or more is a big step for him. I am paying about $13 a week for diapers for both babies using generic. I did want to try cloth diapers with dd1 but husband made me feel stupid for it so I didn't. Honestly my kitchen washrags are rags or I would use them as diapers and at this point I am so far behind that I can't run to Wal-mart and buy some cloth diapers. I feel so stupid. I am sitting here making excuses and shooting down suggestions. Instead of spending $13 next week on diapers, I could buy a dozen cloth diapers instead. Which I will do! Anyways, I'm sorry I'm blabbing on and on. I have suggested that I work nights and dh can stay home but he refuses. He is pretty old school and while he loves his children, he doesn't have any idea what to do with them. He hasn't even changed a diaper - ever. I hate making excuses for him. I look like such a pansy. Both of our Grandmas live fairly close but watching both babies is too much for them and everyone else works. So family watching kids is out. We make $4000 a year too much for food stamps and I spend about $50 a week on food including dhs lunch stuff. I do use coupons and look for super sales.

Im sorry. I sound like such a whiner. I really love my life, I just need to get out of this hole and I truly appreciate ALL the suggestions!!!

Stephanie

**powerfm1** · 11-05-2007, 12:35 AM

Call your local United Way and find out if they can help you find cloth diapers, sometimes the have helplines.

Also if you belong to a church or have a friend that does, you could let them know that you could use some help.

Power and blessings to you hun.

**Nishu** · 11-05-2007, 05:30 AM

There are organizations out there that will help even if you don't qualify for foodstamps. I'm not sure, but I think a food bank would be willing to help you out.

The only other thing I would suggest would be picking up a late evening job. All sorts of places are hiring right now. Get the girls on a strict 7:30 bedtime and maybe work for 8 to midnight stocking shelves. I've done it. It takes a lot out of you staying up late to work and getting up early to take care of the girls, but just until your finances start smoothing out I bet you could handle it.

You also might talk to your husband about not waiting for that police department job. It sounds like any second job for him would help out, even pumping gas.

Don't feel bad for sending him off to work, either. Something has to be done, so unless he wants to learn how to change diapers and tie pigtails he should probably start looking for more work.

Good luck!

**homemaker66** · 11-05-2007, 05:56 AM

Could you babysit for other people durning the day? Just one child would bring in an extra money.Maybe you can turn off the cable and go back to watching just the local tv stations. The libarary always has movies that you can rent for FREE...There is nothing on those cable or dish stations except all the re-runs. Go to the local food bank you will be surpise on what you get from them. Christmas will be here soon. Go to the dollar store and get the kids there gifts or make your own. I use to make homemade playdoe and put it into nice containers and gave it to the kids for a present. At this age they don't know the difference where the gift was bought from. Go to the local second hand stores and find some nice toys there clean them up and wrap them up. I always did that for my kids and they were not hurt by that they never knew. Call your light company and ask them when the rates drop to the lower cost of kilo watts (ours is after nine p.m.) that is when you will do your laundry and hang it over the clothes bars for the night and they should be dried by morning. Alot of times you can buy household products alot cheaper at the dollar store. I get my cleaning products,soda, some snacks,and personal care products from there. Sometimes walmart is cheaper on some stuff so just watch your prices. I hope this helps and good luck.

**frugalfarmwife** · 11-05-2007, 07:31 AM

You're NOT whining, you're talking it out

And hey, you've made the first and biggest (and hardest) step, admitting it's time to DO something about it!

As for the evening jobs, right now is a GREAT time to pick up a part time stock job, Christmas is coming! I work 10pm to 6am doing stock, yes it's HARD and TIRING work, but WORTH IT! Even 1-2 nights a week would bring in a good bit of extra money.

And being home with the kids is SO VERY IMPORTANT! They NEED a parent there so don't you feel guilty about it!

hugs,
kj

**Susanscraps** · 11-05-2007, 08:01 AM

I'm sorry you are having such a tough time. It would be great if you could do some child care. I would call everyone I know and let them know you are available. Even if it is just parttime hours. Things will start to get crazy with the holidays...I know when my kids were small, it would have been great to have someone to watch them while I did errands/shopping etc...
And try out those cloth diapers...in the long run, you will save quite a bit of $$$. Is your DH aware of how tight things are? Maybe he could get that PT job in the evening...any little bit of extra $$$ will make a difference. I would definitely check out the food bank. There is no shame in that, there are plenty of people having a rough time...when you are back on your feet, pay it forward!
There are many good, frugal tips here...please keep us posted on how you are doing!

**Susanscraps** · 11-05-2007, 08:11 AM

Oops...just wanted to hop back on with a suggestion...check and see if you have a freecycle group in your area...post a message asking for cloth diapers...maybe you'll get lucky!

**Cricket1** · 11-05-2007, 09:02 AM

I agree with the others--childcare in your home could bring in some extra money. You're already home anyway--what's a few more?!?!? I used to do this when ds 1 was a toddler and it was great extra money.

If your dh doesn't change diapers, I would not take his opinion on cloth diapers into consideration at all.

**Ceashels** · 11-05-2007, 09:42 AM

What about doing laundry or ironing for neighbors and friends? You can do it at home and they can drop it off and pick it up. Or wrapping gifts? Or making meals? With a nominal fee attached to the cost of the ingredients/supplies?

**frugal-fannie** · 11-05-2007, 09:44 AM

Originally Posted by ssmithson

My dh is probably the biggest hurdle to getting out of this mess, God bless him. He is trying to get on at the local police dept as a backup officer for a parttime job. He is already on the fire dept and first responder team - voluntary and unpaid, of course. But the police job would be paid. So crossing fingers for that. I have a hard time asking him to get a second job when I feel so guilty for staying home. Also, he is a major spender. He wants big things and he wants them now!!! Taking his lunch instead of spending $10 a day or more is a big step for him. I am paying about $13 a week for diapers for both babies using generic. I did want to try cloth diapers with dd1 but husband made me feel stupid for it so I didn't. Honestly my kitchen washrags are rags or I would use them as diapers and at this point I am so far behind that I can't run to Wal-mart and buy some cloth diapers. I feel so stupid. I am sitting here making excuses and shooting down suggestions. Instead of spending $13 next week on diapers, I could buy a dozen cloth diapers instead. Which I will do! Anyways, I'm sorry I'm blabbing on and on. I have suggested that I work nights and dh can stay home but he refuses. He is pretty old school and while he loves his children, he doesn't have any idea what to do with them. He hasn't even changed a diaper - ever. I hate making excuses for him. I look like such a pansy. Both of our Grandmas live fairly close but watching both babies is too much for them and everyone else works. So family watching kids is out. We make $4000 a year too much for food stamps and I spend about $50 a week on food including dhs lunch stuff. I do use coupons and look for super sales.

Im sorry. I sound like such a whiner. I really love my life, I just need to get out of this hole and I truly appreciate ALL the suggestions!!!

Stephanie

I had to use cloth diapers for my first one, she was allergic to the perfumes in pampers. I used a diaper service sometimes the hospital gives you one month free and then I also bought some. I think at sears. I bought these nice velcro plastic pant. Duckies I think they worked great.I used cloth for the rest of my kids, we only bought pampers if we had someone babysit who wasn't comfortable with the cloth.