confession time - sooo embarassed

**Tater** · 01-03-2008, 04:09 PM

Okay, here goes!!

Years ago I was a SAHM and did really well with money management. We had very little debt, the bills were always paid, we even managed to save a little every month on our VERY tight budget.

Then I went back to work. All of a sudden I had a paycheck and extra money to spend. I went crazy and "forgot" my frugal ways. I didn't "need" to be frugal anymore, so I wasn't.

Now, five years later, I'm mortified to admit I have $20,000 in credit card debt!!! I can barely make the minimum payments. Not that I've done it all myself - dh has helped, but the debt is there nevertheless.

Dh and I had a long talk last night about it and we've cut the card up. Our goal is to slowly pay off the debt, lowering the amount of credit available as we go, until its gone. We drew up a budget like we had when I was a SAHM. I've got to return to my frugal ways and tighten the ol' belt. I've got to just take a deep breath and DO it!

You guys are the only ones I've admitted my problem to. Other than my dh, no one knows but you. I knew you would encourage me and give me tips.

WHEW!! I feel better having that off my chest!! Has anyone else climbed out of this sort of debt? How did you do it? What made the biggest impact in getting it paid off?

**ktsmama** · 01-03-2008, 04:18 PM

I think you have made the most important step, realizing there is a problem and making a plan.

Good Luck!

**emily_hope** · 01-03-2008, 04:25 PM

Don't be embarassed. Most of us have been where you are now. We just tightened our belt and paid as much as we could at a time until ours was paid off. It's not easy, but it sure does feel good when you are finished. Good luck!

**Jskell911** · 01-03-2008, 04:56 PM

Why the embarrassment? You have made a mistake and are taking responsibility for it. I say good for you! You are right that you will get much support here.

**bee9984** · 01-03-2008, 04:59 PM

I started working part time this past September. These pays are extra and do you think that I have any of them saved? Nope.

Further more I totally understand how you are feeling. I personally feel like we are back to our way of living 5 years ago prior to starting our frugal journey.

I just want to start the New Year off on the right foot and start keeping receipts and tracking our spending, start living like we were up until this past July or August? I can't even remember anymore lol.

My terrible weakness I am discovering as well are my kids. Well there is no more "bank of Mom and Dad". They received their Christmas spending money and were told to make it last till way after the New Year as that was it, they were broke before New Years Eve. They have asked for extra $ and instead of us giving a lecture while handing them money, we just flat out say "No". We had divided up Christmas money sent to the kids etc and both of our girls ages 14 and 16 had $150 each

Do you know what your weakness is?

Are you joining the challenges? I joined a couple to get back on track

We all cheer each other on, everyone here at FV is so supportive

Hope I didn't make your thread about me lol, I just wanted to let you know that I feel the same as you and understand

**DaisySue** · 01-03-2008, 05:10 PM

First of all THANK YOU for sharing! We are probably $15,000 in CC's! It is so upsetting. None of it was really unnecessary stuff either! I want out of debt, but it is gonna be a long, long haul to drag ourselves out. And I don't think hubby is gonna be much help.

**zenmama** · 01-03-2008, 05:16 PM

This is exactly the thing that most frightens me. Once we get our debt paid, I'm afraid our goals will have been met (at least those out of obligation).. It's a very difficult mindset to change and I'm afraid it's one that I haven't mastered yet. You've at least adressed it with your DH. That's a great big step in the right direction.!! I'm cheering for you.

**LexTysMommy** · 01-03-2008, 05:21 PM

Good luck! We are here for you! Good for you for cutting up the card! That is great first step!

**larabelle** · 01-03-2008, 06:07 PM

I say bravo for admitting and addressing your credit card debt. Sick to reading the many posts in these forums and you will get lots of ideas as well as encouragement in eliminating your debt.

**larabelle** · 01-03-2008, 06:09 PM

I could not edit my post. I meant to say "Stick to reading the many posts in these forums and you will get lots of ideas as well as encouragement in eliminating your debt."

**AmyBoz** · 01-03-2008, 06:15 PM

You CAN do it!

**Daisygirl** · 01-03-2008, 06:55 PM

Seems like I have done this to myself time and again. Every time things start going better I relax, and then my spending creeps up with my income and then WHAM. When will we ever learn?

Good for you for taking the first step - you are NOT alone in this predicament!

**pkellyc** · 01-03-2008, 07:08 PM

Tater $20,000 isn't sooo bad. Think of it this way, most new cars cost more than $20,000. Is it possible for you to divide it up into a 5 year plan? No longer than a car payment which most people do have.

**mikandmari** · 01-03-2008, 07:32 PM

Um, Tater.... I've been in the exact same situation as you

. I had very frugal ways as money was tight when the kids were little. Then around 1999 my dh landed a really good job. We had a small business and things were going strong with it. On top of all that, the real estate market was booming, we were renovating and renting and flipping houses. We were making a lot of money. And spending even more. And working non-stop.

This lasted about 5 years. One night we were so exhausted from all this work and ready to collapse on the sofa when a tenant called screaming that her toilet overflowed and water damaged several rooms. That was the final straw.

It took 2 years to sell the properties and simplify our lives. We made some money but are down a LOT of monthly income from rentals.

Sorry for the ramble... but I just want you to know that because you have frugal skills from your years as a SAHM, you will survive this cc debt

I dove back into my frugal lifestyle about a year ago. It will take a couple more years to pay off the debt, but I'm much happier now!