As A Parent What Would You Do?

**Jmarie** · 04-27-2010, 10:53 PM

I appologize if anyting in this post offends anyone.. If I have offended you, I am truely sorry and that is not my intent.

So I got a call my cousin telling me about her sons day at school.. and here is what happend. The teacher called my cousin to the front of the class and asked him to pull his pants up (mind you he had on belt and wears them at the waist), and then proceeds to tell him to ****ots sag f*g.. My cousin respond back to him saying "shut the hell up" and walked to principle office and demanded someone to call his mom. Now my cousin is suspended for 300 days (the school year ends in 3 weeks.. so he is out for the majority of the next school year) because the principal doesn't believe that this teacher would ever say this to a student.

So my question is how would you handle this situation...

**nessarowdy** · 04-27-2010, 11:24 PM

Well, for starters, all the principal would have to do is ask the other students in the class what they heard and saw. Individually. I am apparently not cool and have no idea what that first word was that the teacher said, but it was obviously not a good one. I wouldn't let it go. 300 days is EXCESSIVE for saying to a teacher "Shut the He## up, imo. Kids that get in fights and do far worse get much lesser punishments.

Is there a dress code at the school? I would also check the handbook for specifics. If it doesn't state anything regarding attire, then the teacher was wrong by calling him out in the first place. They may need to get a lawyer if push comes to shove, but 300 days is ridiculous!

Good luck, keep us posted!
-Vanessa

**Lady_V** · 04-27-2010, 11:25 PM

Suspended for 300 days? That's almost 2 academic years... for saying "shut the hell up"?

If it happened to my daughter, I would be at the school in a flash, contacting the school board, the superintendent and the media if need be because it seems a very stiff penalty for something non-violent... especially if my daughter went to the office voluntarily about it... why would she tell the office what happened and them only believe HALF the story. I would also be contacting any parent of any child my daughter was close to in that class and ask them what happened.

BUT....

There is always more to a story than what is passed on...

**2ndGenGranola** · 04-28-2010, 03:02 AM

Originally Posted by Lady_V

There is always more to a story than what is passed on...

Agreed.

To me it sounds like the cousin hasn't heard the whole story and the kid is making up one to deflect attention from what he really did. You cannot even get a bully out for a week in most situations. They sure are not going to suspend a kid for 300 days for just words.

**Josephhgoins** · 04-28-2010, 08:10 AM

Well, first MY pants don't sag. thats all I am saying about that. Personally I would be proud that your 2nd Cousin didn't punch the teacher. Even in this day in age, being called that is incredibly insulting to any male.

The punishment is EXCESSIVE!! I would call the principle, school board, local media, and anyone and everyone else I could. I would make sure that everyone knew exactly what happened. Trust me when the truth comes to light the 300 days would have been a typo and it was supposed to be 3 days for saying Hell and being disrespectful.

And if I really wanted to show my butt. I would find out the names of the other students in his class and do whatever I had to do to arrange a day where they all wore their pants in similiar fashion.

Sorry this is happening to your family.

**Jmarie** · 04-28-2010, 11:18 AM

So from speaking with both my cousin and his Mom.. here is an update..

There was another teacher that witnessed what happened but does not want to be involved. His mom has contacted an attorney as well as the school board, principal and the teacher. His mom requested a meeting with the principal and teacher, and was told, there is no need for one!!! I think that trying to get some proof from the students may be necessary if thats even possible. I dont have any children, so Im not sure what laws or avenues have to take place. I do believe that his punishment is very excessive, but again I can not say if this is first offense or not.. but being suspended for almost 2 years helps no one.. and where they live, Im not sure if she can enroll him elsewhere or not..

Thanks everyone for letting me vent and getting your opinions

**Jmarie** · 04-28-2010, 11:19 AM

Originally Posted by 2ndGenGranola

Agreed.

To me it sounds like the cousin hasn't heard the whole story and the kid is making up one to deflect attention from what he really did. You cannot even get a bully out for a week in most situations. They sure are not going to suspend a kid for 300 days for just words.

Unfortunately they have.. saying that its the teachers words against his. And since he cursed *hell* created a scene and disrupted class is how they justify it.

**porembam** · 04-28-2010, 01:06 PM

300 day suspension is very long. I don't think this is the entire story.
Does your nephew have a track record and this was the straw that broke the camels back.
If what you say is true - it really doesn't add up. Usually students are suspended for a much shorter time for even greater offenses.
If the teacher did as was stated they would be in trouble too,
other classmates will have to tell the situation also.

**Jmarie** · 04-28-2010, 06:14 PM

Originally Posted by porembam

300 day suspension is very long. I don't think this is the entire story.
Does your nephew have a track record and this was the straw that broke the camels back.
If what you say is true - it really doesn't add up. Usually students are suspended for a much shorter time for even greater offenses.
If the teacher did as was stated they would be in trouble too,
other classmates will have to tell the situation also.

Another teacher that witnessed what happend does not want to be involved and so far the school is not allowing the other students to be contacted. So its basically his word against the teacher. Yes, it is a long suspension. The teachers side is basically that he asked him to pull up his pants and was told to shut the hell up and disrupted the lesson by walking out of the classroom and demanding to speak with his mom.

For me, the issue is whether teachers has the right to speak to students in this manner and hide behind the principals. To suggest in front of a class room a persons sexuality and call him a derogatory name, to me is more of the issue. Yes he was wrong for saying, sshut the hell up, but I dont think his actions out weigh the teachers actions. The fact that the other teacher does not want to be involved, to me seems like maybe there was more said from teacher.

However, like I said, an attorney has been contacted and hopefully a full on investigation takes place.