Confused/torn

[miracle]

I have 2 kids. Almost 11 and almost 8. Bear with me here. Please.

DD(10) is very bright. In 1st grade her teacher told me that she had handed out a paper and before she got done explaining it to the class dd had it finished. She said it was on fact families and she herself took awhile to do it the first time she saw it. But dd had it down in no time. I always get rave reviews about what a great kid she is. Before the start of the 4th grade we moved. The first 6 months she was at the nurse alot and sick/missing school. Thats new to her. She only missd 2 days from k-3 at the other district and they were not due to sickness. When they shut the school for mold removal, a very toxic kind and transferred to another school she never had any problems again. But now this year, in the middle school(5th grade) she is catching every bug. She missed, including this week(everyone is sick) she has now missed total of 11.5 days. She is slacking on her work in 2 subjects she got A's in the first 9 weeks down to a c almost a D in one. She can do far better. In fact, we were approached through a letter from Carnegie Mellon University for her to take an 8th grade test in a few weeks. This is a result of the national tests they take each year. She is always in the 99% nationally and locally if that means anything. The test is voluntary. They have enrichment type activities throught the year for them to learn at a higher pace with peers of the same aptitude. She thinks studying in their free period is all she needs to do. Well she is not doing well.

DS(7) is very smart but difficult to pull it out of him. We held him back/started K a year late for reasons I do not want to get into here. He still tells me that 1st grade is too easy and boring. I told the teacher and she said well he takes all the time given to him to complete a task. Sure he does. He could take 2 hours on a drawing. He wont stop till you tell him to. I do like this teacher but I cant get this through to her. She is wonderfull. Anyway, He became very ill last year due to the mold and once transferred he was fine. Although this year he is catching everything too. They just went backon the 21st) to the normal school that was closed. He missed all this week since he threw up in class on Monday SO he has missed 11.5 days already to(sickness not due to mold,absent rates are extremely high). He is also eligible for the Carnegie Mellon program but not the 8th grade test part. They have programs for his grade also. If we started him on time he would be in the 2nd grade now( a very small 2nd grader). Part of me is mad we held him back.

Anyway, I had considered HS years ago but the people I knew who did it seemed to me to do it for the wrong reasons and they are all christians such as myself. Here I am again considering it for the reasons: once healthy kids are sicker than ever. Dont feel they are applying or being applied by the teacher to the best of their ability. Yet, the thought of taking on that responsibility is frightning. I do work part time. Have to. DH got laid off and we are living on a 20,000 pay cut. DD is in the band. She would have to give that up. I want them to be involved in extra curricular activies. How do I do that at home. I get too cooped up being home all the time with them. This week has been bad. Been home since midday monday with fevers ect. DH would most likely not go for this HS thing. Maybe consider a christian school BUT they would still have to go to PS HS in 9-12. They BOTH enjoy school. Love school. I dont know how to go about thinking this through without the biased atitude I got from the HS's I do know who I disagree with as to why they are doing it. I am not a PS hater.

get this....ds has more homework than his 5th grade sister does. Seems like it should be the opposite.

I look at all this homework that has to be done as a trial run in HS. Only I work tomorrow all day! Maybe Saturday.

[cinnamon]

Well, without your husband's support, I don't think you really need to think too much about homeschooling. It is a tough thing to do as it is, without having to squeeze it around your work schedule and an unsupportive spouse. And especially if your kids are against it, too.

Everyone homeschools for different reasons. Some homeschoolers do "hate" PS. Whatever. Some hate private schools, too. You can find homeschoolers who do it because they think the PS's push Christianity, and other who do it for the exact opposite reason. Hsers are a pretty divided bunch amongst themselves, between the unschoolers and classical ed's and everyone in between. The only thing we all agree on (I would hope) is that we want the best education for our kids.

I guess I'm rambling to say - if you do decide to homeschool, you CAN find like minded folks to link up with. Just keep looking.

You said: the thought of taking on that responsibility is frightning.

To me, it is frightening to turn over my child's mind, body, and soul to someone else for the better part of their formative years.

You said: I want them to be involved in extra curricular activies. How do I do that at home.

Extra-curriculuar activities are activities done outside of regular school, right? Unfortunately, we have become accustomed to the schools providing this, too. What about Parks and Rec, church activities, city league sports, hs support group and co-op activities, Scouts, etc. Our local school district is having so many budget problems right now that they are about to drop all high school sports. You know it's bad when even sports is on the chopping block. But I digress..........

Homeschooling isn't about being cooped up at home all day. It is whatever you choose to make it. MWF we had swim lessons, Tu was homeschool PE, W night was Awanas, today is our Science Co-op. We love our quiet days together, too.

I'm rambling. Hope some of this makes sense.

[TheCottageRose]

You have a few questions you may not have come to terms with. Kids activities, you are wanting to move them back to PS for High School. That is a lot of moving and adjusting for the kids. Taking them away from friends then blending them back in years later doesn't always work well. And there was some stress from the move originally.

If you don't have a problem with the system you are working in, then maybe it is best to stay with things as they are. If the trends you see continue, you might want to take a second look at HS-ing.

I think most people who HS have a conviction behind doing so. Unless you have a blended situation where some of the kid's friends are HS-ing and your kids want to be HS-ed, then it might be more difficult to make that change.

For us, we weren't moving along in the course work like we needed to be. And, my '16's core group of friends were one by one dropping out of the Christian school to HS. He was miserable at the school and promised to make it work.

His grades have come up a full grade point, from mid 80's to mid 90s since leaving, he has doubled the progress he's made and he goes two or three times a week to play basketball and work out with his friends.

One of the friends will move to Public Hs next year. Because he wouldn't keep up with his work and his mom didn't want to be a HSing mom.

His other friend is doing great, and another friend will join them this next year HS-ing.

We exchanged playing basketball for HSing, a huge change for my athletic son, but he works out with the Private school and Public school as well as the street guys at the recreation center, so he gets his fill and says B-ball isn't worth going back just to play ball. He has matured so much taking control of his work this way, and he knows its up to him to make it work.....and he has.

I didn't want to do this, didn't want the struggles I had earlier experienced in HS-ing. But, it is working for '16'.

I hope you find reassurance in your decision.

[cinnamon]

Originally posted by TheCottageRose
If you don't have a problem with the system you are working in, then maybe it is best to stay with things as they are.......I think most people who HS have a conviction behind doing so.

YES! That's what I was trying to think of and could not get the words out. The best homeschoolers I know have a real fire for homeschooling. They live it and breathe it and they know it is the best for their kids. It is this conviction that carries you over the rough spots.

Whatever (or Whomever) leads you to homeschooling has to be strong enough to see you through. If you don't have a fire in your belly for this, then it will be easy to give it up. And bouncing kiddos from public to private to home to whatever is probably not going to make anything better.

[homesteadmamma]

I have to agree, homeschooling is not for everyone and if your not 100% committed to it and your dh doesn't support it, then you need to look at different alternatives rather than homeschooling. Homeschooling may not be the answer for you. I think Cinnamon said it best - we has parents all want whats best for our children when it comes to schooling.

Everything has been said here that need to be said in regards to homeschooling.

My suggestion would be to find out if the school your children are now attending has mold there also. I think finding out the reason for your children getting sick so much would help tremendously in knowing why their grades have changed. You may find that they are in the exact same situation as they were in before "mold". Recently, they had to shut down a school here because of mold.

Whatever you decide, I wish you all the best for you and for your children. Not an easy decision to have to make.

[miracle]

Thank you for all of your responses.

Unfortunately, I can not find out if dd school has mold since they won't test for 1 person. Her problems stem from the exposure of the toxic mold(can have lingering problems and more susceptible to illness now) at the elementary school she was in last year(she was never sick in k-3 at the other disrtict we were in). They just reopened it after a year and my ds has returned there 2 weeks ago. Tests came back really good. They spent $1 million on mold removal ,new roof and such. DD is in the middle school now.

I checked into christian schools here and they are way to pricey for us. About $6-7 thousand for 2 kids. We can not afford that. No scholarships available either.

I need to find a way to make PS work or start discussions with DH about HS. In my favor is that my job is flexable. About 12hours per week. I go in M-W-F from 8:30-12:30. I'm lucky enough to work down the road from where I work so throwing in commute time is no big deal for me.

Thank you all for your help.

[Miss Kitty]

I think your biggest concern must be addressed. What is causing your children to be so ill.
First I would ask the school nurse to give you the numbers for sick children on an average week.
Then I would take them to your physician for a complete physical and have him check for allergies.
Last, if nothing major shows up at the dr. I would check into having them see your pastor or a counselor to see if there is something going on that they are not telling you about.
I know my dd always becomes physically ill when under stress. She will start with the mouth herpes, stomach aches, progress to diarreah and headaches.

[keilley]

I agree with having your kids checked out for others health issues. If they are sick so much, I would go to an allergist/immunologist. They know their business. They can check the immune system for normal levels, etc.

Homeschooling is a great option if you have the heart for it.

Keilley