Clingy 2 year old

**mylittle4** · 10-16-2002, 02:50 PM

My 2 year old is so clingy and personally it doesn't bother me I want to hang on to her for as long as I can, but dh has another opinion he mainly doesn't want her sleeping in our bed. He works nights so it never bothered me, but he probably is right she does need to learn to sleep in her own bed. I have tried letting her fall asleep and then putting her in her bed and I have tried putting her bed in my room and slowly inching it out the door, but nothing seems to work. Anybody conquered this situation before?

**Sara Noel** · 10-16-2002, 03:52 PM

I wish I could help, but we do family bed here and my son is older than 2. LOL
Thing is with our son even if he starts out in his bed, we wake up to him in the morning. He sneaks in about 4am. LOL AND he's a bed hog!

Sara

**bamamomto4** · 10-16-2002, 05:00 PM

Sorry I can't help.

I always heard once you started letting them sleep with you,it was hard to break the habit,so i never let mine sleep with us LOL
Don't get me wrong,I love my kids,but I've seen my cousin sleep with her mom till she was 8 or 9 yrs old.
I didn't want that to happen with mine....

Katie does come to our room about 5-6 am and gets in bed with me (dh leaves at 3:30) .Most of the time I never know till we wake up at 7 LOL

Maybe tell her how big she is,that big girls sleep in their own bed etc....Maybe that'll help

**ymay** · 10-16-2002, 05:37 PM

We are another family bed here. My dh was a little concerned about this at first, but now was happy we did it. He is asked about it sometimes, and he said he never would have thought he would advocate for it, but now things are children are very secure.

Plus, he liked the fact that he could whisper I love you to me through the night, and also make sure they were covered and not chilled at night.

However, some people like your dh are uncomfortable with it. I respect that.

I wonder could you involve your dd in redecorating her room somehow. Anything from a new pillow or comforter to whatever she really likes in her room.

Could you get her something cuddly all for her own to replace hugs from mommy through the night.

What is your bedtime routine like? Perhaps if you just kept or established bath, bed, story time in her bed then something special with her ... like saying goodnight to everything in her room. We did that with our kids, following the Good Night Moon Theme.

We also got them special little lights for their beds and put a night light on for them.

Is she afraid now that she no longer has you close by. Perhaps if you could get her to talk about things you could find out why she is hesitant to be alone. My dd would see shadows or light from the moon sometimes and it scared her a bit.

I got my dks to bed with a combination of these things, the lights, the bedtime routine and establishing reading time and then nights out. Now they read to me, and I will let them read for a bit on their own. Before long they are fast asleep and I go and turn off their light if they haven't already.

If your dh is really stuck on this, you may have to just do the tough love stuff. Like do the bedtime routine, and leave, go to her to answer her calls, but not let her out of bed.

My friends did this with success, but it took about a good couple of weeks to have her finally settle into the routine and stay in bed.

I see your little one is only 2, so I wouldn't be surprised if you still get some night time visits. However, if she does get settled in her room, you may have the bed to yourself most of the time as well.

Oh, my nephews took a Fisher Price flashlight to bed...like a night light, and it would shut off by itself and he found it comforting to have if he got scared or thought he heard something. That is what would get him into mommy and daddy's bed.

Just some quick ideas off the top of my head. Hope one of them helps lead to a way to help your little one settle into her room easily, and comfortably.

Last tip, if you decide to do this be really consistent and stick to the routine no matter what. I really did not think it would work for my friend because of all the drama involved at bed time( tears, getting out of bed and being walked back) but it did. After the couple of weeks, my friend said her dd just seemed to be comfortable with the routine, and realized mommy and daddy were serious and she settled in.

Good Luck! Sorry for the book. I was just trying to recall any ideas I have heard or seen work for my family and friends.

{{{hugs}}} to you! I loved having my babies close to me at night. We only established a really strict bed time routine when they started school.

yvonne