A Letter I wish I could send ---

[Lady_V]

Dear Beloved Adversary,

Our battles have been epic, yet there was never a winner. Through the years, we never had a truce. We have had several periods of ceased communications which were broken when one of us was in dire straits which usually resumed as soon as the crisis was completed.

You called me and told me you have coronary artery disease and you are not a candidate for bypass surgery. I have heard more emotion from you when you chipped a nail.

You have surrendered, and that has never been like you. As far back as I can remember, you fought everything and everyone.

There may not be a magic pill to cure your ills, but there are ways to keep it from allowing it total domination. Preventive measures, anticipated plans of attack, methods to prolong the conflict.

In the same casual tone you told me you have CAD, you go on to tell me you have no plans to take any action, no medications, no dieting, no deviations from your normal day to day.

It is time once again for you to become pugnaciousness. You have yet another fight ahead of you. Never surrender for this is one crusade in which we are allies, rallied against an invisible antagonist.

Perhaps I am being selfish because of my vexation;
I am angry at you for your apathy.
I am angry at the doctors for not anticipating this sooner.
I am angry at our creators.
I am angry because I am not ready to lose my nemesis.

I am angry because I am not ready to lose my Mother.

[JustMegan79]

I am so sorry that you are going through this. This is terrible. I have been in relationships with people who have given up as well.

My own Mother has told me if she is ever dx with breast cancer (she has a very bad scare last year) that she will not seek care. She will not want it. She has lived a long, good, fullfilling life.

It is a foreign concept to me, she says she would demand I get care if it were me, I said thats hypocritical...she says its not because I am young and I have time.

Our Mothers have time as well. If they choose to use it.

Again, I am feeling for you and hoping that you and she will be able to talk about it again soon, with better results.