Curfews for teens

[Palooka]

So what's your rule and how do you decide?

My daughter is 17 and out with her boyfriend at a fancy Christmas party with his family with dancing and all that fun stuff. I let her go out all the time but I can't just say..hey...be back at 10 or 12. I just tell her to text me later and tell me whats going on and what she is doing. Then I decide what time she should come home.

When I was growing up I had the curfew of midnight no matter what I was doing until I moved out.

So I'm curious for those that have teens here...do you just set a time and be done with the communication or does it depend on what they are doing?

[Mom2-3]

The teens always have to text me to keep in touch. Once in a while we will throw in a surprise call just to hear it's them (I remember being a teen)

Their curfew depends on where they are, who they are with and what they are doing. DD #1 and her BF are going to a dance and curfew is 12am.

I guess it depends each time. I had a 10pm curfew till the day I married!

[Palooka]

Ha! Don't you just love texting and the world of cell phones. Yeah, I remember being a teen and um....I was just a wee bit on the wild side.

I consider myself a cool mom and I do trust my daughter(we talk about EVERYTHING)...but I always use the famous words...I was a teen once and it wasn't in the dinosaurs days either. I swear she hates when I say that! lol

So far the latest she has came home was 11:30. She wonders why I just don't give her a flat curfew and be done with it like my parents did and all her other friends parents do. I just can't say...bye honey..be home at 1am without knowing what's going on.

[akolb]

Mine was 11 on school nights and 12 on weekends. Occasionally 1 if it was a special event. I was a pretty good kid...ya know, the regular parties and stuff, but I was never in real trouble.

This was before texting. I had a pager (remember those!?) and if my mom paged, I had 10 min to call her back from where ever I had said I would be.

Pretty smart mom.

[joyofsix]

No curfew for the 17 or 15 yo. I need to know where you are and with who and reserve the right to text you and get an answer but no problems. 13 yo has less leeway.

[Neeley]

It all depends on what they are doing. When they were 14 and 12 (they are 16 and 14 now) there was a teen internet/xbox 360 gaming cafe here. Both of them loved to go there. It was a small, one room area and the owners kept a close eye on everyone. We allowed them to stay there until 9:00 or 10:00 on a weeknight and 12:00 on the weekends. We popped in, rode by or called often.

Since the gaming cafe closed, there is not that much for them to do at night. They don't enjoy riding around or just hanging out at the mall. But if they did, we would probably give them an 11:00 or 12:00 curfew. Whether there is a school dance or they want to go to a movie, curfews are decided upon based on the activity and who they are with.

I don't text with the kids. I prefer to talk to them. I have a better chance of figuring out if something is up if I can hear their voice. I can't do that by reading a text.

[NewLeaf]

I have a 14 yr old ds. The time he has to be home depends upon the activity and who he is with. If he goes to the movies we drop him off and pick him up right after its over. If it's an outing w/ a friend I still prefer to have an adult around to keep tabs on them. I did let him go to a birthday party w/teens invited. I had some reservations because it was in the family's basement and I didn't know them well. So we dropped him off and gave him 2 hours. It was his first teen party. Later he told me some older guys brought alcohol (after he left) and the parents had to kick them out.

[Palooka]

No curfew for the 17 or 15 yo. I need to know where you are and with who and reserve the right to text you and get an answer but no problems. 13 yo has less leeway.

I won't let my daughter read that.

I let her come home at midnight last night plus her boyfriends mom wanted him home at midnight too so she was happy about that.

[sinopa27]

my daughter is in college. NO curfew required by the college. At home, 12 midnight. I love the technology we have today. Text messages, IM, email, cell phone, and webcam. We can truly keep up with our youth today. I prefer a text now. Straight to the point without all the "how are you, i am fine, how are you"

[McD]

My parents always based our curfew off of the curfew imposed by the state---so until I turned 18 it was 12.

[nodmicks]

My son (a few months shy of 17) has to be home at 9:30 on school night and 11 on weekends. For homecoming and other occasions we have let his curfew be later.

He doesn't like it as many of his friend have no curfew but tough. We live in a little dot on the map town with absolutely no theater, hangout etc.

[YankeeMom]

We are the resident meanies lol.

On school nights, 17yo dd is in by 9pm. On weekends, in by 10pm. We are flexible if she's going to a movie that won't get out until late (on the weekends) but never later than 11pm. There's NOTHING a 17yo needs to be out doing past 11pm...at least not in this town.

My 15yo doesn't go out. She mostly spends the night at friends houses occasionally.

[pinetree]

Our little town has its own curfew, 9pm on school nights, 12 on weekends, unless you are with a parent, or coming home from work. They enforce it.

[mrsfoamy]

It depends on where they are going and who they are with. If they are with adults personally know to me, they can just be home when the 'event' is over. (My DD is 16). I guess that cell phones have made the curfew of our day a thing of the past. So long as she answers the phone when I call, or calls me with an update, it's also not a problem. DD doesn't just 'hang out', or 'Suzy's coming to pick me up and were going to hang out with Jim and some friends'. So that makes a difference too. In that case, I'd tell her exactly what time to be home!

[miss_thrifty]

here for my 17 yr old its home before 12 during the middle of the week .when he's gone to friends on the weekend- I need to know where and phone number incase of emergency's.