Vent sort of

**Rhiamon** · 01-18-2010, 09:12 PM

Okay I really need to vent my daughter has ADHD, a severe impulse control problem and a LD; we are working closely with the school, the drs and a behaviorist. I am doing everything I am supposed to according to everybody. But the last two weeks have been horrible, I have bruises, every night there is screaming, she has had detention etc. If I don't vent I think I will explode.

If you see me pulled over in a parking lot with a screaming child in the car and I am standing outside don't assume I am being neglectful. Maybe I have been listening to a screaming child kicking my seat and hitting me for 20 mins.

If you see me sitting outside on my step with a child screaming inside the house don't assume I am being neglectful. Maybe my child has trashed there room and has been tantruming for 2 hours and I need 5 mins to pull myself back together.

If you see me in the store holding my almost 7 year olds hands the whole time don't assume that I am being overprotective, Maybe I have a child that can't stop touching things, or takes off if you turn your back for a second.

If you see bruises on my arms and face don't assume my husband did it. Maybe I have a child with severe impulse control issues.

If you see me slouched in a chair at the end of the day, with a mess at my feet. Don't assume I am lazy maybe I have a child who is none stop and I have to watch like a hawk, and I am exhausted.

If you see me at the school all the time talking to the teachers, don't assume I am meddling, maybe I have a child with severe ADHD and a LD

If you see me at the library taking just about every parenting book out don't assume I don't know how to parent, or that I am a bad parent, maybe I have a child I have tried just about everything with and am trying to find something that works.

If you see me in the store with a child screaming on the floor, kicking and calling me just about every name they know, instead of looking at me like I am a bad parent, or telling me to shut them up, maybe give me a hug or say something encouraging.

If you see me crying at the end of the day, saying I feel like a horrible parent, and I don't know what else to do and where did I go wrong, please just listen and let me cry on your shoulder.

Thanks

**frugalwarrior2** · 01-18-2010, 09:59 PM

Amen. Been there. Done that. Look ten years older to prove it. Blessings to you. Mine is in college. I still have to slap myself when I start to compare to others or blame myself for that elusive "something" I could have done better.

**mauimagic** · 01-18-2010, 10:05 PM

My heart goes out to all of you parents who are dealing with children with these challenges.....As a teacher of your children, I really don't know how you do it, day after day. You have my total respect and admiration. You deserve all of our prayers, hugs and support. If there is ever anything that I can do, please let me know.

**AnW819** · 01-18-2010, 10:19 PM

Just wanted to send hugs <3

**miss_thrifty** · 01-19-2010, 12:15 PM

I know how u feel dear. My oldest is 17 now but God love him . Some days I didnt know if i could keep going. He was diagnosed by end of grade 2 and went to grade 5 for meds. after that i quit them, for me it just didnt help anymore readjusting all the time and with no differnce. I found that diet made a big differnce too.
no red food colouring, he craved carbs alot, not good thing.
Give any sugar he was literatly spiderman. lol
U COULD TELL him 10x a day no and he just could not understand why or what i was telling him. the brain wasnt keepng the info their long enought to understand and would do it all over again. I have grey hair many btw lol
But I know u can get though this and if you ever need to talk Im here. just message me anytime.
huggsss one day at atime, and remember yesterdays probs is gone, and she would of forgotten them, shes only frustrated with today and what she cant understand and what she wants to explain or do. thats why the temper, I know for my son it was.

**AmyBoz** · 01-19-2010, 01:30 PM

So sorry you are going through this, but the good news is that it sounds like you do have the coping mechanisms to keep yourself together and in control when dealing with dd. You should be proud of yourself for that.

to you and we're always here to listen when you need to vent!

**shoiji** · 01-19-2010, 04:30 PM

Vent all you want.

**pip** · 01-19-2010, 04:51 PM

It's hard to be judged as a parent, usually misjudged.

Keep trying to take care of yourself, too.

**MomK** · 01-19-2010, 06:02 PM

Bless your heart! My niece, now 13, is the very same way! She has been diagnosed with Asberger's Syndrome, an autism spectrum disorder. It's so hard to cope. She is now in a residential facility, and we're hoping their program will help. God bless you. You are not alone. Find a support group for parents of children with disabilities like yours.

**MrsClaus** · 01-19-2010, 07:24 PM

Bless you.

As a mother to a daughter with Asperger's and an autistic son, you have written about my life. Some days it just takes everything you have to make it through. Others are a breeze (but no one every seems to notice those.)

**Rebookie** · 01-20-2010, 08:07 AM

I feel bad for both you and your daughter. =(

**cab54** · 01-23-2010, 12:43 PM

VERY well written, Rhiamon.

I watched a 2 sisters and a brother go through this with their kids. (ADHD/LD)

My one sister said to me once...."I feel like even if I KILLED my daughter, people wouldn't think I was doing enough about her behavior."