If you work and have kids.... At What Age?

[KimZ]

If you work:

At what age did you start to leave your child home alone all day during the summer while you work?

DD keeps telling me she bored at Gymnastic camp because it's all little kids. Well I am paying $20.00 a day for her to be there 2x's a week and if she's not happy I would rather save the cash.... But I have to figure out what else to do with her and I would LOVE to leave her home but.....

[imagine]

Here is a latch key site that gives recommendations and says that some places have age laws.

Latchkey Kids Legal Age Limits Listed By State

[leighcat]

How old is she? I think that some states have an age law. I let my son stay home for a couple hours at a time when he was 11. He knows which neighbors to go to in an emergency and there was usually a phone here with him. Now we have a land line he can use if he is home alone. He is 12 now. I am not sure about him being home alone all day though. That idea makes me nervous. My friend leaves her daughter home all day since she was 11 or 12. Each kid is different I guess, and the neighborhood makes a difference too. I just think my son might be so bored he would do things that I wouldn't approve of.

[frugalfranny]

Here is a latch key site that gives recommendations and says that some places have age laws.

Latchkey Kids Legal Age Limits Listed By State

Thanks imagine............that is interesting reading....to say the least.

I think you have to consider not only your neighborhood, along with the child and maturity/common sense knowledge, but just your whole area. And then how will they set limits for themselves on other things IE: will they be able to have 'friends' in the house, will you allow them to 'cook' something or is a sandwich considered lunch, lots of things to consider. And probably most important.........how can your child be influenced by the company of other children??

And even what I did years ago would no longer apply.........simply because of the changing times, economy--(read--more crime), and just 'society' in general.

[KimZ]

She's 12 1/2 going on 30! She does know how to cook and does listen very well. I work about 7 minutes from my house. I am actually within walking distance ( about 1/2 hr) She knows not to use the computer etc when I am not there.... and she knows I can check if she did! I am a single parent so she has been left alone for upto 3 hours by herself... while I run errands or shop. I can remember when I was a kid being left alone for HOURS but times were different. It's not that I don't trust her - it's that I don't trust others... does that make sense? I have a dog that would protect her but all the neighbors work....

[zakity]

Do you know any moms with little ones? She could get a job as a mother's helper for the summer.

[nodmicks]

Your dd is about the age I started letting my boys stay home alone. I work 30 miles away but fil was always only about 7 miles away.

[dancemommy]

That is tough....I was one of those kids who mostly stayed home alone during the summer from 12 on. I had a brother and we hung out during the day- rode our bikes, watched soap operas and talk shows, baked cookies. My mom usually put us in a couple of weeks of camp and maybe a couple of weeks visiting grandparents or going on a trip and then probably a month or so home alone. When I was old enough I started babysitting- I think really by the time I was 12 I was doing that a few days a week too so that kept me busy. Times are a little different now though. We start leaving our kids home alone for brief amounts of time at about age 10. My 13 year old can stay home alone for a whole day, BUT I wouldn't leave her home alone for a whole day EVERYDAY all summer. I probably wouldn't even leave my 16 year old home alone all summer without any other activities- I think that is asking for trouble. And I have good kids. If it is a couple of days a week I'd let her stay home alone with a list of things you want her to accomplish that day- have her clean out a drawer or read a book or some task. I love the idea of looking for a mother's helper job. If it is more than a couple of days a week I'd say find something for her to do so it ends up only being a couple of days a week alone. Good luck- I am a SAHM and haven't gone back to work for that very reason, but I know some have to work.

[brennasmom]

My daughter will be turning 13 in July and this is the first summer she will be staying home alone 2 days per week for about 2 hours each day. She will have Sadie for company . My DH's job is only about 5 minutes away so if there was something urgent he could be home quickly. She is very responsible and I'm sure she will do fine. I don't think I would want to leave her all day as it seems too long plus I don't want her sitting around watching tv all day

When I was a kid (showing how different things are now) I walked home alone from school at 8 and stayed home until my parents got home a couple hours later. Eek. Having a 8 year old myself I really can't imagine.

[GirlBoyGirl]

She's 12 1/2 going on 30! She does know how to cook and does listen very well. I work about 7 minutes from my house. I am actually within walking distance ( about 1/2 hr) She knows not to use the computer etc when I am not there.... and she knows I can check if she did! I am a single parent so she has been left alone for upto 3 hours by herself... while I run errands or shop. I can remember when I was a kid being left alone for HOURS but times were different. It's not that I don't trust her - it's that I don't trust others... does that make sense? I have a dog that would protect her but all the neighbors work....

At that age, and her maturity level, I would let her stay home. However, I might invest some of that saved camp cash into an alarm system. I think you can get them for $30/month? It will give you both an added sense of security.

My neighbor is a single mom and now that school is out, she picks up her son on her lunch break (guess he goes to some half day camp or care) and drops him off at home and then sets the alarm. He just turned 11 but he is also very mature for his age.

[ARCMOMMY]

Do you have a neighbor who could swing by for $5 a day. Just once a day unannounced?

[daylily]

Yes, times have changed. I was 12 when I started staying home alone. Mom and Dad both worked 2nd shift and I had been staying with my grandparents. I would stay home on weekends. Grandparents lived 1 mile away. I would get off the school bus about 3:30 p.m. and stay home alone until they got home around 1 a.m. I was never bored because I loved to read. I was almost always asleep when they got home.

[peanut]

Here the kids have to be 13 before you can leave them alone. I never worked outside the home so it wasn't much of an issue for us. I'd keep her busy with other activities during the summer and not just let her hole up in the house. Is there a YMCA where she can go to a day program or hang out with other kids under supervision? Maybe a camp through a nearby university or college for kids? We have a science camp here, and a computer camp. Educational and yet they are with people and can have fun under supervision, which is usually supplied by professors and education students.

[KimZ]

no Neighbors unfortunately.... she actually ended up getting a job as a counselor at the same place she said she was too old for :-) they don't pay them cash but she earns things like free Friday Night open gyms and snacks... even lunch from the local restraunt which inturn helps my budget =)

Thanks for all the suggestions

[BlissMommy]

My oldest is 13 and I wouldn't leave her alone, but my next one is 11 and she is trust worthy. It's all based on maturity the way I see it.