Teenage Daughters!!!! Rant!!

**scrappycat** · 03-20-2003, 07:53 AM

If I make it through these teenage years, it will be a miracle!

This past weekend, we let our 17 year old drive to the mall. This was her first time driving by herself to the mall. Well, she hit another car! It was totally her fault, she was changing lanes and hit a car all ready in that lane. She's only had her license since January, we made her take 2 years on her permit, but obviously that wasn't enough! 26 years of accident free discount, out the window! The best part is now she is not speaking to us, because we are making her pay the deductible and any increase in our insurance. She thinks this is unfair, so she's going around the house slamming doors and being a big pain in the butt.

Now, my other daughter is 16. She has only been on one date, and that was the military ball that I posted about earlier. Well, he's asked her out again. Well, it turns out she's terrified. They teach all these sex education courses at school, and she is now completely terrified that she is going to get an STD. She is really cute, and we could never figure out why she never got asked out on dates, well, she did get asked out, she just always told them no. She is afraid they are going to french kiss her and she'll get a disease! Correct me if I'm wrong, but you can't get an STD from french kissing, right? I told her that she needs to go out on dates and this guy seems perfectly nice. I told her that usually you don't just get french kissed out of the blue, usually there's some sort of passionate kissing going on. What was funny, was I was in the middle of talking to her, when my husband came in to kiss them goodnight, right when he walked in, I was saying..."Hayley they are not going to just stick their tongue in your mouth"...my husband just turned and walked out the room..he is always walking into talks like that

So far, no problems from the 13 year old, but I'm ready!

Pam

**mustang80** · 03-20-2003, 08:04 AM

Pam-that is so funny about your hubby! lol

I would do the same thing-make her pay. She is old enough to be responsible for her actions.

My DD is 14, and we are in the attitude-don't want to do my homework stage. She is also paranoid about diseases like her dad.

For example-her gland is swollen in her neck-probably just remnants from a cold she had. The first day, she asked me if she had cancer. The second day, she said I still have this swollen gland, I think I have HIV.

I asked her-Have you been having unprotected sex? Have you used any dirty needles with your drugs? Have you had a blood transfusion lately? After 3 emphatic NO's-I got my point across. Teens

**pita1213** · 03-20-2003, 09:14 AM

Pam- you poor dh. lol he needs to start calling in from another room: hey are y'all talking about girly stuff? or something like that to avoid walking into that sort of thing lol

if dd is really freaked out about the std stuff, take her to talk to the school nurse or her doctor. sometimes it takes someone other than a parent telling you things for you to beleive it.

and i too think that the oldest dd should pay the deductable and the amount your insurance increases. the accident was her fault so she needs to take some responsibilty for it, right.

**Katybird** · 03-20-2003, 09:31 AM

Pam, I know what you mean. My 2 DSs were a piece of cake compared to my one teenage DD. She is a door slammer, foot stomper, total attitude kid. I just keep repeating to myself "someday she will be grown" like it is my mantra, LOL.

**captclearance** · 03-20-2003, 09:52 AM

I don't mean to be the bearor of bad news but some STDs can be transmitted thru kissing, HPV1 and HPV2 (herpes) and although less common other STDs can be transmitted. Talk to her Dr. about it........

**milach** · 03-20-2003, 10:44 AM

If she thinks it's unfair- then tell her to get a job, get her own car and pay $2500 a year for her own insurance. I think you're being more than fair- you're right to make her responsible for her own actions.

Laura

**Mom23boys** · 03-20-2003, 10:55 AM

Teenagers!! I hope we all get through these years.

I don't think it is unfair at all to make her pay the deductible after all, it was her fault.

**scrappycat** · 03-20-2003, 12:05 PM

Thanks all for the advice and support! She has gone looking for a job. She turned in applications at a bunch of places around here. She was fired from her first job. She thinks she knows everything, you cannot tell her anything without her saying "I know, I know". Well, she did that all the time to her boss also, and he finally got tired of it, because she didn't know and kept making mistakes.

Well, I guess I'd better go read about STD's before Hayley has her date Friday night. They are going to play miniature golf and then out for ice cream. Sounds innocent enough.

Pam

**Patchworkgirl** · 03-20-2003, 12:30 PM

Oh boy....I totally sympathize with you. I am going through terrible times with my 18 yr old daughter. She is totally different than her older sister who never gave me one minute of trouble. I am getting paid back double with her!! I keep telling myself that this too shall pass, but some days I just want to strangle her!!

**halo475** · 03-20-2003, 02:30 PM

{{{HUGS}}} everyone!! I know what you mean-These teen years are gonna kill me!! LOL

"This too shall pass"
"This too shal pass"
"Ths to shall pass"
...

**voodidit** · 03-20-2003, 02:51 PM

I'm sitting here trying to put down what I'm thinking into words and I can't lol.... I agree with hat everyone has said. She should pay for the deductible and the increase if there is one, it is only fair. maybe a defensive driving course as well?

I also think maybe having your daughter talk to your family dr. about std's might be a good idea also. As long as she knows the person she is dating, has he dated anyone else? That info can be good to know. I have a good idea from what you have said that she's not planning on having sex anytime soon so maybe all you need to worry about would be oral herpes.

You seem to have some great kids, you are doing a wonderful job and dh should be greatful you are having those talks...lol.

**heaven** · 03-20-2003, 03:00 PM

Hang in there Pam. God will someday reward us for not killing our children by giving us grandbabies. Someday I don't know if it is worth it. I totally agree she should pay the deductable and the increase in insurance.
I hope it all goes well with the mini golf date.
My oldest wonders who I have lived so long being so stupid. I keep telling her write down EVERYTHING you know NOW because someday she will be my age and know nothing, (expecally if she has a teenager.) this too shall pass.

**vecollins** · 03-20-2003, 03:12 PM

oh ladies don't get me started on the teenage girl thang--LOL -My ds is 19 and not a problem at all, his only thing is he loves to AGGRAVATE on pick on people -----but my dd who will be 18 in August is MAD ---I mean she doesn't do drugs or drink, but she thinks she is 25, she quit school in the 12th grade (wouldnt try) she thinks money grows on trees, i mean really!!! She works or I say she works (she hd a job as cashier for a year, well after her 4th car accident, i did say 4th!!!! she left that job because of injuries) then whe decided to work at a hotel for about 3 weeks and now says they told her to come back after she finishs all her chiropractic stuff (well she got a good 2 week paycheck and was broke in 5 days)

Her first accident she bumped someone in the rear, the 2nd one she backed out of our driveway into a truck, the 3rd one she rear ended someone and they in turn hit someone and then the last one she was in vehicle with her best friend and they got hit!!!
She has pretty much moved in with the friend's family, they go to doctor 3 times a week, etc for neck and back injuries.......needless to say she won't be driving anymore anytime soon!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOT UNTIL SHE CAN GO OUT AND GET HER OWN AUTO INSURANCE ANYWAY....LOL Besides that she talks to me like i am a dog, no respect whatsoever so i have told her she has a long road to tow--------I am not paying her way anymore........she wastes her money and doesn't try to hold onto any of it.....

the ds pays for his truck, his insurance and always has steady cash --he is in college and works......
I definately believe that girls are much harder to raise than boys!!
Well i think i have went on and on way too long......

**scrappycat** · 03-20-2003, 03:36 PM

Vickie
4 accidents!!! I don't know what I would do after 4 accidents! You poor thing.

I don't know why girls are so hard, but they are. Just 2 days before the accident, we caught her in a lie. She said that she was going bowling with her boyfriend and would be gone from 5 to 11. Which is very long time to be bowling. Well, we found out she was really going over to her boyfriends house. And it turns out noone else was going to be home, his mother would be at work from...you guessed it...5 to 11. I hate to think of what 6 unsupervised hours would have led too!! Of course she got all huffy when I said that when you agree to sneak over to a boys house, with no supervison, that he is expecting something. She, of course, became very indignant that I would even suggest such a thing!

Pam

**Katybird** · 03-20-2003, 04:51 PM

Sheesh teenage girls! I think we should just keep this thread as a permanent venting thread for our teenage girls. Mine just came home from school and has already uttered 2 curse words under her breath (within 10 minutes

) I just told her one more profanity and no phone or computer and she has the nerve to ask me "what is your problem", it is a good thing that chaining them to the wall and feeding them through a panel in the door is against the law or she might me in big trouble, LOL. I keep telling her I love you with all my heart but there is the nothing in the Mommy manual that says I have to LIKE you!

Where is a nice strict all girl religous military school on a mountain top with only access with a sherpa guide and a mountain goat when we need them.