I could use some input here.

**Ellise** · 09-12-2003, 09:42 AM

As you all know we moved here in October last year.
And since starting scholl here my DS has been being picked on, called hurtfull names, hit in the back of the head, poked with pens & pencils in the leg, etc... Well, Daniel has finally had enough of it and fought back on Wednesday, one boy inparticular has not let up on him since day 1.

SO DS shoves this boy down the hall and shoved him into his locker. A teacher witnessed it and now Daniel has 2 days of in school suspension, the other boy didn't get into trouble.

Keep in mind my son is much SMALLER than the other boys, yet he is the only one in trouble!

He asked if I was mad at him. How could I be mad that he stood up for himself? I mean there is only so much one can take before you reach your reactive state.

I have a good mind to go down to the scholl and speak with the principal and teachers and find out why the other boy didn't get into any trouble.
What do you think?

**Darlene** · 09-12-2003, 09:52 AM

I've tought my kids to stick up for themselves so no I wouldn't be mad at them. Nobody has the right to abuse them.
I do think adults should be in on this and show all involved that they are to respect and get along with each other. Have you spoken to someone at the school about the harassment before?
Hope they (school) will work with you on this to make sure that this doesn't happen again.

**dz_blonde_girl** · 09-12-2003, 10:07 AM

I would most definately go to the school and talk to them about this. It takes 2 kids to fight, so there is something wrong if only 1 kid gets in trouble. There's always the chance that the other kid is also being punished, but your son isn't aware of it. I've had problems similar to this with ds since he started school, and we've just last year been able to work it out with the school. I had to go to the superintendant though. If your not happy with what the principle says, go over his/her head.

**mrscornbread** · 09-12-2003, 10:11 AM

Please go Ellise, this must be addressed at once. If you don't show Daniel that he did the right thing, he may be picked on forever. Good luck and let us know how it went.

**Ellise** · 09-12-2003, 10:33 AM

I called the school, I have an appointment on Monday DH is going with me.
I did talk to the principal last year (new one this year), It seems that this "click" of kids NEVER get into trouble! It's about 10 of them, ANd the only thing I got last year was " Oh we know how that one is" Well DUH! if you KNOW how this child is then why the @&## don't you do something!
I have also requested that their parents be there!

I refuse to let some PUNK rob my son of his future!(sorry). They pick on him because he's smaller, smart, gets good scores, and isn't a follower. I just can't beleive this crud

I know that lots of children are abused in one fashion or another, and that these kids tend to take out their anguish on others around them.

But Daniel shouldn't have to pay for what goes on behind closed doors!

This boy that DS got in trouble over started in again the first day of school because he found out Daniel took the SAT and got a scholarship to DUKE! How STUPID is that?

**AmyBoz** · 09-12-2003, 11:16 AM

I would make sure that the new principal is aware that your child is being bullied in school, and I would encourage your son to also make sure that he always tells an adult when he is being bullied. If the adults around aren't aware of what is happening, there is nothing they can do to stop it.

As a teacher, I know that there are times when I walk in on something in the middle and have missed what started it and perhaps have gotten the wrong impression. It could be that the person who saw your son shove the other boy didn't see the picking that began the fight. If it is known by all adults in the building that this other kid is picking on your son, they'll be less likely to jump to the wrong conclusion if they witness things like this. Stress that this is an ongoing thing in the meeting with the new principal and also make sure to say that you met with the old principal and that your concerns were dismissed too easily. New principals are very willing to act where others were not.

**crdurham** · 09-12-2003, 03:56 PM

Elisie,

I think you should run, not walk down to that school and have a talk with the principal. Take it from someone who lived it, bulling is wrong and until someone does something about it, there will always be kids that act this way. I think that your son should not have gotten into trouble for trying to take up for himself. Kudos to him for standing up to that guy!!

When I was in school, I was harassed, called names, had food thrown at me, picked on....etc...etc. No one at the school would do anything about it because it was the "popular" kids. I took that crap for 10 years....and continued to have emotional scars from it in my adult life. I can only imagine what kids have to go through now. Its a shame that children are bought up to treat other kids that way, if children were taught respect and to not look down on others...this crap wouldn't happen....oh sorry getting off my

now...

I agree totally for you going to the school about this! Give them a good

and don't let them try and justifiy your sons punishment.....and make them make the other kids accountable for thier actions....ok, i'm done....this is a real sore subject for me....lol...can you tell.....I just wanted you to know that I support you and your son for sticking up for himself....

**Dixie** · 09-12-2003, 06:31 PM

I would talk to the Principal first thing, Monday. It's been a long time since I was in school, but I remember seeing a boy in my class bullied constantly. He was asthmatic and very intelligent, he was also a "tattletale'. The other kids were horrible to him. These kids in our classroom were the kids of prominent families. The victim was from a farming family. Guess who's side the teachers were on?

Today, 30 some years later, I cringe when I think of the tortue the poor boy went through.