Has anyone else noticed how jaded our children have become? I get so upset by how much ds#1 thinks he "needs".And he is only six. I use to think that when I have kids I would give them everything they wanted. Of course, this was wwhen I was a kid and mom kept telling me no. We live in the wildflower capital of the United States and my kids aren't impressed by the HUGE fields of bluebonnets that you see everywhere in the spring. Hell, I'm impressed in this day and age when there doesn't seem to be an open field anywhere anymore. I clean their room and find toys they just "had to have" busted and under the bed. I have literally quit buying toys period. And the one that gets me the most is "Mom, there's nothing to do!" What? A bazillion dollars in movies, toys, and bikes and there is nothing to do? I remember saying the same thing to my mom, once. Then I got to clean my room. The TV doesn't help either. They just find more things that they "need". I just want to chuck that damned thing right out the window. I work at a resturaunt and some of the people I wait on are crazy. One table had two kids, each of them with their own game boy and a couple of games each. Now, tell me what is wrong with expecting them to sit and talk to one another. Sheesh! Does it get worse as the children get older? I have a feeling we are going to brawl.
I hear you. It`s the same with my kids here. I think, that kids today probably have everything too quickly or easily if you compare to our own childhoods. I know I don`t give them everything, but, they get so much more then they actually need.
And with peer pressure, publicities, tv... How can we fight this out of their heads--that they always want more?
I don`t have all the answers, but I think if you persist in giving more your presence, your open ear, your time and explain your choices in life, I think they may end up by understanding the essential when they get older. I say this because my almost 14 year old is starting to realize the truth behind all we have been doing all these years. He`s not the perfect kids with no wants, but he is starting to see that he can`t have everything instantley. He sees how hard his dad works to pay for everything and he sees all the time and efforts I put in his life.
So, I think you can have hope that when they grow up, the values you gave them will stay with them. Meantime, we`ve got to go through the growing up part! LOL! Which is really NOT easy.
When it gets tough at home with the kids, think about me...I don`t pass a day that I don`t encounter a problem. It`s hardly ever a smooth and easy day with my boys...
But I love them dearly(especially when they sleep )LOL!
I don't think today's kids are jaded, they're just spoiled rotten. Today's families are making more money per hour than our parents did (atleast that's the case here) and feel we owe it to our children to get them whatever they want. When we do, the toy goes unused or gets busted because why should they take care of the things they have? Mommy and daddy will buy another one. It drives me mental to go to someones house who has a kid and every room in the house is filled with more toys than Toys R Us. All the toys my ds owns can fit into a a big Rubbermaid tote in his closet. Granted he's only 2, but when he gets older, I refuse to get everything he wants- we have a house and bills we need to pay. Since your ds is 6, there's no reason why he can't do chores around the house to earn an allowance so he can buy all this stuff he "needs" with his own money. One of the few, if not only good topics on Oprah (a few years ago) they were saying give your kid an allowance $1.00 for each year of age. So in your case, give ds $6.00 a week. BUT, the kicker was he had 3 jars, 1 for spending, one for saving and I think the other was for charity. So your ds would put $2.00 in each jar a week. The one for saving, he could never touch. The one for spending is the one he could use to save up for whatever toy he "needs" or movie rental, pizza party with a couple friends on a Fri night, whatever. Then the one for charity he donates as he wishes (like to buy a turkey for a homeless shelter during the holidays, or toys for a holiday toy drive for local needy children). I think this system teaches very good money habits and values you don't see alot of today.
One thing that does help me out here is that we do not have cable, dish, antenna- so he is not bombarded by all the toy commercials during the Sat AM cartoons. During the weekends, instead of all of us staring at the TV, we all go out and do yard work, and ds helps. Sat, dh mowed the lawn, ds had his toy mower, "mowing" right along the side of him. Yesterday, we bought some pepper plants- ds dug the hole in the garden with his little shovel and put the plant in. DH helped him put the soil around it. Then we let ds water them (what kid doesn't love to play with the hose?). I want my yard to look like one out of a gardening magazine, and I can't do it all by myself. I feel getting them involved is what makes them appreciate nature and the like. They're not going to appreciate it glancing out the window every once in a while during the commercials. I really feel TV is to blame for alot of things in our society (laziness- both kids and adults, some violence, lack of appreciation or concern for the world and environment around us). I'm telling you unplug the TV (computer, nintendos etc) so your kids will be forced to find something else to do and take a look at the world around them.
So that's where I'm coming from on the topic. I haven't been able to put the allowance idea to use yet, but that's my game plan so I won't be raising a spoiled child that feels they need everything and has respect for nothing. I wish you the best of luck!
I agree with you Laura, but I have to tell you that as much as we try to bring up our children in a simple way, by not giving in to all their wants, I have learned they will still ask and want everything they see, either on tv or from friends at school.
Let`s just say my expectations about how my boys who were suppose to turn out, calm, always kind and generous and helpful, since I was sahm, I breastfed them so long, and they got best of my love and time...well, I fell down hard from the dream. My reality is that I do have 4 beautiful, kind and generous boys, who are also loud, who fight, who argue and who do want more! LOL! :surprise:
I am afraid my DD is getting that way because my Sister Buys Her Everything and......
I am afraid my DD is getting that way because my Sister Buys Her Everything and Anything DD wants!! I can't afford over half the stuff my sister buys my DD !! I don't mind everyonce and awhile that my Sister busy my DD a gift but I don't want it to be something that I can't buy my DD it makes me look bad and feel bad that I can't give my DD that!! My DD will be raised where it doesn't matter about Materialism things !! I want my DD to realize that Materialism is not everything and just because her aunt buys her Everything and Anything She wants Her Momma and Daddy are not and Can not !!
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Our jaded children
I remember saying the same thing to my mom, once. Then I got to clean my room. The TV doesn't help either. They just find more things that they "need". I just want to chuck that damned thing right out the window. I work at a resturaunt and some of the people I wait on are crazy. One table had two kids, each of them with their own game boy and a couple of games each. Now, tell me what is wrong with expecting them to sit and talk to one another. Sheesh! Does it get worse as the children get older? I have a feeling we are going to brawl.
I am afraid my DD is getting that way because my Sister Buys Her Everything and......
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