Did you put your child on a schedule (sleeping, eating) or just let him/her do whatever they wanted? At what age did you start scheduling a bedtime and naps?
I'm choosing to let my DS do what he wants, and while he's fallen into a groove at night, he's still all over the place during the day. He's 7 weeks.
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Loving wife to DH (8/31/03) and Mommy to Owen Alexander (9/20/06)
In the beginning, I never 'scheduled' anything. Not feedings, and only sleep when they had their days & nights mixed up. Thank goodness that never went on for very long.
My kids each had their own schedule. They each got tired at the same general time of day, so that was when they napped. Feeding times got more scheduled as they got more into solid feedings. Bedtimes were roughly enforced early...usually when they started sleeping through the night. The time itself was adjusted as their sleeping needs changed.
Sorry it's so vague. Each of my kids were different in that one of them needed to have a very regular schedule, one could care less, etc. I never went by the clock though, always by their cues.
I don't think scheduling works as well with children as parents hope.
I mean think of it this way: let's say you are hungry at 9 a.m. but you aren't scheduled to eat at 11 a.m. Do you let your hungry grumble, rumble, and ache or do you snack or take a drink to ease that?
My way of thinking is that my son couldn't regulate when he was hungry or not. So I let him eat when he seemed hungry and sleep when he was tired.
And at about the age of 5-6 months he had himself on a schedule. He is still on a schedule.
I'm not about to tell anyone else how to raise their kids, but that's what I'm doing with Wesley. I just don't think a child that young should be scheduled, that's my own personal opinion.
When my first child was born the nurses used to put them on a schedule in the hospital, so she came home already sleeping & eating at specific times. She never deviated from the schedule, went to sleep easily, slept through the night early, and was never hungry between scheduled feedings.
When my second child was born I had read all kinds of books & articles by baby "experts" and the general concensus was that you should just let babies do whatever they want and they will settle into their own schedule. Unfortunately, this was not true for my son. He ate & and slept at different times every day and was up most of the night. Eventually we had to force him into a semi-regular schedule. It took two days to establish a regular bed & nap time, the mealtimes fell into place on their own for the most part, but he still wants to eat whenever he is awake. He was about 5 months old at that point, he's now 2.
My third child fell into an easy schedule on her own right from birth, but has developed some bad nighttime habits. We have recently started working on those problems, since the lack of sleep is having a severe negative impact on my health, the children's safety and my husband's job. She is just under one.
So basically, every child is different. What works for one, doesn't work for others.
My answer is very similar to Heather's. I had my first 3 kids 6 years apart then waited 4 years to have my last one, and so every child was different as to fit their needs and personality although when they started sleeping through the night it got easier to enforce a schedule.
I never scheduled either one. My oldest has developed her own schedule as far as sleep goes. She is in bed by 9 almost everynight and is up by 7 no matter what, no alarm clock - just gets up on her own. My son on the other hand may be in bed at 10, or it may be 2. He is up no later than 9 though. My two developed their own schedules as they grew. One likes breakfast first thing, the other has to have been awake an hour or two before eating. One is a night owl, one an early bird. I think it all depends on the child. My son would have benefitted from a little more structure in his schedule and I doubt it would have changed anything with my daughter. Kind of a hard call to make - just follow what you think is best.
I tried to put my first one on a schedule because I was a young mom and that was what the child development books all said to do but it did not work for us, I think that DS ended up putting me on a schedule instead , when he was ready to eat I fed him, when he was tired I put him to bed, when he was fussy, I walked him, rocked him, sang to him and did anything possible to sooth and quite him. When the second one came along, I was older and wiser and we compromised on a flexible schedule, I put him to bed at a reasonable hour and I woke him up at the same time each morning, it helped getting him regulated to a normal sleep pattern. By the time my third and last baby was born, child rearing was a breeze, we did not do schedules but just got into a pattern and did great like that.
DD was on a semi-schedule. I got her up at the same time and we had bath and bedtime at the same time, but what happened in the middle was different every day.
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With both of ours when they were first born we followed their lead. I breast fed on demand and we slept when we could! As they got older we went more to a schedule. Like, around 6 months, when we started solid food, that followed a pattern but I still nursed them whenever they wanted. By one they were on a good schedule, which we still follow, more or less.
~ nap after lunch nearly every day
~ snack after nap (between lunch & dinner can be a long time for little tummies)
~ bed routine around 8 p.m. (pick up toys, bath if necessary, small snack - not every night but most, teeth brushing, story, prayers, lights out)
This has worked well for both girls. We don't stress when we deviate, though. For instance, tonight we were out with friends and we didn't get home until 10:30. So we just had the routine late and now they're already asleep. Occasionally we miss nap time but most of the time we follow this schedule and they both seem happier because of the routine. With this new baby, who knows? We'll do whatever seems to work! My girls are not quite 5 and just turned 2, but they both respond to routine and predictability - for now.
We like routines more than schedules. Generally the baby would wake up in the morning, want to eat, need a diaper & 'daytime' clothes. Soon after, she would be sleeping. Wake up, eat a little, change a diaper, doze off. And so on.
By about two months, they would have longer awake periods, so once or twice a day they would stay up to play (maybe 20 minutes, maybe 2 hours). When they got tired or fussy, they got a little boobie (sorry!) and put to bed.
By ?? 3 or 4 months, both my girls were into nice routines with three naps a day (morning, afternoon and evening), and playtime in between.
The evening nap got dropped pretty early (maybe 6 or 8 months of age), and was replaced with a 7 or 8pm bedtime and sleeping through the night.
The morning nap is usually dropped between 12 & 15 months of age.
Well I have done it 2 ways with DD #1 I did schedule we just did whatever whenever, it worked for us she was an only, I stayed home with her so in the day it was just her and me (at night it was her me and her dad) and we just made it up as we went.
Then the triplets were born when DD #1 was 5 1/2 years old and well with 3 infants, babies, toddlers plus a older child to get to school and back and here and there I needed them to be on a schedule in the day it was me and the 3 babies so it was a strick schedule.
They were in the NICU for a while so they were scheduled by the nurses on feeding times so I modified that and we stuck to that.
Still to this day (they are 8) we still follow a schedule, dinner time, snack time bed time and even with activities I still try to stick to my schedule.
This would be my advice do what works for you!! If you like the doing things whenever your son wants (like feeding, napping etc) then do that. If you need a schedule (going back to work, or you just are a schedule person) then do that.
BUT my best adcive is do what works for you and your family, not what others think you should do BUT what works for you!!
Like a pp said, we prefer routines. I "try" to do everything around the same time everyday, and the kids tend to gravitate towards those times. We don't schedule, because I have learned (at least in my cases) it backfires. LOL 7 weeks is still a bit young too though to see the results, imo. I think all of my children were closer to 3 months when I noticed that they were doing things at the same time everyday. GL to you!
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, when he was ready to eat I fed him, when he was tired I put him to bed, when he was fussy, I walked him, rocked him, sang to him and did anything possible to sooth and quite him. When the second one came along, I was older and wiser and we compromised on a flexible schedule, I put him to bed at a reasonable hour and I woke him up at the same time each morning, it helped getting him regulated to a normal sleep pattern. By the time my third and last baby was born, child rearing was a breeze, we did not do schedules but just got into a pattern and did great like that.
As they got older we went more to a schedule. Like, around 6 months, when we started solid food, that followed a pattern but I still nursed them whenever they wanted. By one they were on a good schedule, which we still follow, more or less.
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