Activities

**northernmom2boys** · 03-16-2007, 10:45 PM

My kids are not in any groups or after school activities,except fror swimming starting soon.My kids are so tired from school and homework that I think it would put more stress on them to be involved in alot of after school activities.My sil thinks we are the worst parents for not having our kids scheduled every minute of the day like hers is.
Are we awful parents?Are my kids going to need theraphy when they grow up
Just wondering what everyones opinion was

**McD** · 03-16-2007, 11:39 PM

Do your kids express interest in activities? If they want to do them, I don't see why to stop them unless it would physically/mentally harm them.

If they don't want to, don't push them.

That would be my two cents.

**dwallyfam** · 03-17-2007, 08:32 AM

I totally agree. Sometimes we push our kids to much and don't get them enought downtime to read or imagine.

**AmyMCGS** · 03-17-2007, 08:35 AM

Ditto. If your kids are asking to join something, that's one thing, but letting them have some "downtime" is good for them.

**jamie79** · 03-17-2007, 09:34 AM

Kids need time to be kids and your SIL isnt raising yours!!!

**YankeeMom** · 03-17-2007, 09:46 AM

My kids do not have after school activities either.
They do a few over the summer. Occassionally the older girls will get involved with a short term thing for school. But none of them do sports with or without school. None of them do clubs, etc. They don't want to. And even if they did, I would limit them to one activity per child. I have four kids, if they each have just one different activity I'm running around like a chicken with my head cut off

As it is, between them being in three different schools, me being in school, me working, dh being out of work...ah. I'm not gonna ramble.

Suffice to say, my kids are not in activities and they are very well-rounded kids. They all do swimming in the summer, the boys do t-ball in the spring/summer. Other than that, they are just fine without all that extra crap.

**pita1213** · 03-19-2007, 05:58 PM

as long as your kids are healthy and active, you don't HAVE to put your kids in some kind of activity. i'm sure they socailize in school and get plenty of physical activity through playing.
dd is in girl scouts and will be playing softball this spring. ds doesn't want to do anything this spring. that's fine with me. dh thinks he needs to be doing something. so to keep us both active, ds goes for walks with me. he gets mommy time and we both get exercise.
i've asked ds if he wants to try karate or something like that, but right now has no interest.
if you are happy and your kids are happy, let them be kids and play and relax after school and homework. every minute of every day doesn't need to be scheduled. you are not a bad parent, and not being in an activity will not cause the need for therapy

if your sil keeps bugging you, come up with al ine to tell her everytime she brings it up. like, we're happy letting them be kids. or that's great your kids enjoy it, but this works for our family. eventually she'll get tried of the same answer and stop bugging you.

**Neeley** · 03-19-2007, 06:23 PM

Activites are not for everyone. You do what works best for you and your family. If they expressed an interest, then I would go from there. By no means would I say you were awful parents.

For us, our kids do many activities throughout the year. We do not have more than a two week span between the end of one activity and the start of another. At times we may have two actvities per child going on. But my kids love it, they are the ones who make the call on what activities they do. They are homeschooled so their schedules are very different from those in traditional school. There is no homework and once they do their lessons their day is wide open( school lessons only take between 2.5-4 hours). We do some kind of practice, class or game atleast 5 days a week but they have more than enough time for it. Currently DS's baseball season has begun and DD is taking a sewing class and volunteering with the baseball league for mentally and physically challenged individuals.

I would not worry about it. A lot of people think that their way of doing something is the only way and everyone else is wrong. If they ever do express an interest in an activity, many of the churches have wonderful things for the kids. There are basketball, soccer and volleyball leagues that are non-competative, everyone plays equal time, only practice one hour a week, etc... They are very family friendly and non-stressful.

**Edna_E** · 03-19-2007, 09:03 PM

Mine usually had one, sometimes two, and church. Through Junior high and High School, he was in a bowling league. Littler, sometimes he played soccer or baseball and 2 years he did cub scouts. In HS, he did Key Club (which is a very minor commitment here) and tutored at the Boys and Girls Club (which contributed to scholarship eligibility). The only time I pushed an activity was when we moved when he started Jr. High and he said he "couldn't" play soccer because he hadn't grown up with the teams here - hence the bowling, where they were not already picked. It worked out well for him, but I have always felt sorry for kids who were so busy they never got to go home and "just be" after school, so I always tried to curtail how many days his activities fell on. Just one mom's opinion!