Co-sleeping

**Ani** · 05-12-2007, 10:38 PM

Who here co-slept/is co-sleeping with their baby? Were you embarrassed/worried to talk about it with other people? Did others react strangely to you doing this? Did you find that it was beneficial for you and the baby?

I had tentatively planned to co-sleep with Oliver, depending on how he took to it, and he's taken to it wonderfully. I try to put him down in his cradle, but he fusses and sounds so pitiful and I can't stand to have him away from us. We're used to sleeping with animals, so neither hubby and I are prone to rolling over on things etc. Neither of us drink, and we make sure not to take medications that would make us groggy and unaware (I haven't taken a single bit of pain medication since leaving the hospital). We just love how peacefully we all sleep when he's in bed with us, plus with my c-section it makes night time comforting and feeding much more convenient. I happened to mention something about it to a relative though, and they looked at me like I'd grown a third head. I can't imagine that it's that uncommon to co-sleep, is it?

Any thoughts, stories, input, advice, personal experiences etc are very welcomed. I'm interested in an open discussion on the topic. I feel like what we're doing is best for our baby, but maybe it isn't.

**DJ1972** · 05-12-2007, 10:49 PM

My kids are beyond that, and other than by accident, they didn't sleep in our bed. But I think you should do what's right for your family. My cousin has decided to have her baby sleep with them, and so far it has worked great for them. Here's a cute article I sent her.http://www.wholefamily.com/aboutyour...hildren_4.html

**guest56464** · 05-12-2007, 10:53 PM

I did it while I was breastfeeding. There's nothing wrong with it. And since I've stopped breastfeeding and moved them out of the room there have been no adjustment problems (thankfully) to their new beds.

Do what you feel is comfortable.

**Neeley** · 05-12-2007, 11:01 PM

My kids are now 11 and 14 and both slept with us. I never thought twice about it and if I were to have another baby tomorrow, that one could sleep with me too. I slept with my parents for years. The night before I had my daughter, I spent the night at my momma's house and I slept with her eventhough there were two other beds at her house. DS is a bad sleep walker and I still will go to sleep with him sometimes so I can keep an eye on him at night.

**Marie78** · 05-12-2007, 11:19 PM

My sister and I co-slept with my parents for years...even at 3 to 6 years of age we would sleep in their bed if we were scared or had a bad dream. I even remember the last time we all slept together, when I was 9, the night we found out my grandpa had passed away. I remember it being difficult for my sister and I to take to our own beds, it took a few years of adjustments to regularly sleep in our own beds. I felt so safe with my parents and those years are filled with some great family memories.

I know that I will co-sleep with my own children someday, or at the very least have their cribs in the room with me, until they are old enough to not need me constantly. I think that one of the reasons I feel so close to my mom and dad are the strong bonds that were formed at such an early age.

**TomsMom** · 05-12-2007, 11:28 PM

Both of my kids coslept. All most every mother I am friends with IRL has done it or is doing it. I loved it, the babies loved it, and it made nursing so much easier. I didn't ever care who knew. I figured if they asked, I told them. Some people asked and then acted horrified, told me stories about how the kids would never leave my bed, how I was spoiling them, etc. I told them that I was sure when they went off to college they would find their own bed, and that fruit spoils, not babies. They are now 6 and 9, and sleep in their own beds happily

They are only little for so long, only want to be cuddled for such a short time... why would you not take advantage of that?

Do you belong to any natural or AP parenting online sites or groups in your area? I saw your difficulites with nursing thread and had no more to offer than the great advice already supplied. Is there a La Leche League or Natural Family Living group around you?

A funny aside... the first time my daughter saw a crib in someone's house, she was about 2. She whispered to me in that loud whisper 2 year olds have "Mama, why do they have a cage for the baby!?"

**Radish4ever** · 05-13-2007, 01:04 AM

I think co-sleeping is great! We did child-led weaning on breastfeeding and co-sleeping with my daughter and it was awesome - she was done with both at about 15 months (I was also pregnant at the time and in my first trimester) - We co-sleep with Michael with no problems! Well, he technically co-sleeps AND sleeps in his swing. LOL
Grace slept inher crib for a total of maybe 15 minutes of her life so we didn't even bother setting one up for Michael.

It makes breastfeeding SO much easier once the side-lying thing is easier (I know it took me a good 6-8 weeks to figure out a good latch side-lying....especially after the C-Section with Grace... I felt terrible and couldn't sleep on my back or side without pain for about that long... once that was gone, it was a breeze and I loved side-lying nursing!)

Anyway, I don't think there is anything wrong with it. As with most of my choices (most of which are NOT popular around my area lol), I'm just kind of matter-of-fact about it. I am a very well-educated, caring, nurturing, loving mom just doing what I feel is best for my family!

**julieb** · 05-13-2007, 06:28 AM

I remember cosleeping with my parents when I was young. I had night terrors so badly that it was the only way anyone got any sleep. As I got older I didn't and am perfectly well adjusted.

Do what is best for your family and the heck with anyone else.

**AmyMCGS** · 05-13-2007, 09:34 AM

We co-slept with DD, and occasionally with DS... DS seems to sleep better in his crib, and I'm a little concerned about DD crawling into our bed at night and accidentally squishing her brother. We also have a great thing called a Snuggle Nest, that has 3-sided "walls" around baby's head to prevent any accidental pillows or anything from suffocating the baby. (Mine is older and doesn't have the lights/ supports that the newer ones have.)

Yes, people looked at me like I had three heads when the topic came up. My parents and in-laws, especially. I just learned not to mention it in certain settings.

**YankeeMom** · 05-13-2007, 12:16 PM

I co-slept with all my babies. It was just the natural thing to do for me. I never worried about 'getting my bed back'. They were better able to transition to their own room/bed I think because they were more secure thanks to the co-sleeping time. They are all still welcomed to our bed when they need it.

I still think that a large part of the reason we have very very very little bedtime troubles is the co-sleeping we did. How else is baby going to learn to sleep if not next to his sleeping parent, secure in their arms, warm and comforted.

**Emerald_Mommy** · 05-13-2007, 08:21 PM

We did co-sleeping with our two oldest, sort of by default as I was exclusively breastfeeding and that's also the only way they would sleep.

Our newest baby sleeps in her bassinette (which is two steps away from our bed) pretty well but she also sleeps with me at least part of the night. I think as long as you're taking the precautions you mentioned (no alcohol, drugs, etc.) it should be fine. My parents didn't have a problem with my kids sleeping with us but I never talked about it to Philip's parents because they didn't quite approve.

My oldest girls were in their own beds/rooms by 1 year of age and we've never had any bedtime problems, bad dreams, etc. I think it worked great for us.

**PB&J** · 05-13-2007, 09:08 PM

I tried to cosleep with my first, but he just didn't like it. He would NOT sleep in my bed. With my second, he slept with me until he was 3, I think. lol DH always worked nights, so I didn't mind having another person in bed with me to snuggle with.

My third, she slept with me until she was about 3.5. DH still works nights, so it really wasn't a problem. Mikey, my youngest, he slept with me until he was about a year old. We bought our house just a few weeks before his 1st birthday. I was up so late for weeks, painting and doing work, so I started putting him to bed in his crib. And he slept so much better! So he has been there ever since. On the rare times he wakes up in the middle of the night, I will bring him into bed with me.

All my babies have been breastfed and cosleeping was so much easier for me.

**WillandJakesMama** · 05-13-2007, 11:02 PM

I bf my oldest for 2 months, so he slept in a bassinet beside our bed. I think I moved him to his crib at 3 months, but he never actually slept in our bed. He was a horrible sleeper as an infant.

My youngest slept in a moses basket in our bed for 2 weeks and then I moved him into his crib. He comes in our room 4 or 5 nights a week and wants to sleep with me (he's a HUUUUUUUUUUGE mama's boy

), so we go in the guest room!

**ubumartin** · 05-14-2007, 11:48 AM

I didn't co sleep but I think you need to do what is right for you and your family.

**annymoll** · 05-14-2007, 02:16 PM

I did not do the co- sleeping or family bed.Had friends that did, kids were school age and banging on the door at night wanting to sleep in the parents bed. It was a major issue to get them settled in their own room.(Reminded me of a cartoon in Playboy I saw once. The adult son was in bed with the mother- father asked,"Isn't it about time for Junior to sleep in his own bed?")