Probs w/kindergarten already (vent)

**GFNancy** · 08-17-2007, 01:48 PM

Last week when we went to the Meet the Teacher day, the teachers specifically said that we weren't supposed to worry about whether they could read or write. All children do these things at different times. You don't need to push it. It will happen. Some kids can't write at all. Other kids write really well.

DD can write her name. The way I taught her to do it. In the last couple of weeks the "e" is all of a sudden backwards, but other than that you look at what she wrote and it definitely says her name. It's not chicken scratch. Those are letters. I figured she would be about midway between the kids who were writing well and the kids who still couldn't write her name.

They do use a different way of writing the alphabet. It's supposed to make it easier to transition to cursive. Which I can totally see. I figured, no problem. I was sure they would work with her on the backwards e and go from there with the rest of the class. I'm sure all the kids in the class had different issues with writing the letters the way they want them to write them. They even SAID that every week they'd be working on a different letter and there would be room on the take-home page to practice writing the letters.

But now, on the 4th frigging day of Kindergarten, they say they need her to write her name with the alphabet they use. And they won't accept her name the way she has been writing it. They make her do it over again.

They sent home a piece of paper for her to practice writing her name "the right way". I'm all for working with her at home every day to transition into that alphabet. But yesterday, they made her sit with the teacher and write her name while the rest of the kids were playing. They said the class was supposed to write their name on a piece of paper and then do the activity on the paper. Then they were allowed free time. Well, apparently, the rest of the kids did it perfect. They wouldn't even let her do the activity on the paper until she wrote her name properly. So it was like punishment that even though she CAN write her name, because it's not the way they want it, on the 4th day, she's pulled away from the rest of the class.

I mean come on. Don't blow smoke up my --- at the orientation and then go in completely the other direction. Be straight with me and tell me this transition NEEDS to happen ASAP and give me a few days with her at home. Don't punish her because I believed what YOU said.

If the rest of the class happens to be really good at writing already, it's MY job to get her up to speed with the rest of the class. But my gosh people! First let me know, and then give me a couple weeks to get it done. Don't start pulling her away from the rest of the class before you even tell me about it.

The biggest part of my frustration is really that they said one thing and then did the complete opposite.

ARG!!

Nancy

**Odilia** · 08-17-2007, 01:58 PM

Ugh! I'm sorry that happened to your DD. I would be pretty steaming at that.

**Mom23boys** · 08-17-2007, 02:01 PM

I worked a little with kindergarten last year and the children who didn't know how to write their name correctly worked one on one with a teacher or peer student (a high school student). They were usually taken to work on this activity while the class did whole group, which would be the teacher reading a story or another simple activity.

I understand your frustration because you were told one thing and something else happened. Have you tried to communicate your frustrations with the teacher?

**ubumartin** · 08-17-2007, 03:22 PM

I worried about my dd too, she would write letters backwards, start at the right of the page and write backwards all the way to the left. I was reassured by the teacher that most children are Drawing the letters, not really writing them at this age. They don't understand the whole concept yet. They think that the letters are there it doesnt matter what direction or if they are all in one line. I am sure she is getting some extra help to maybe catch her up. Does she feel sad that she is working on this or is she o.k. with it? I would work on the letters with her and just don't get upset yet, it is only the first couple of days, I am sure the teacher is evaluating the needs of each child at this point. If it is bothering your little one maybe speak with the teacher on what you can do to work on it at a different time than playtime. Good luck.

**ubumartin** · 08-17-2007, 03:32 PM

I work in a first grade class at a different school system than my children. They use Denelian which is a style of writing that uses a type of letter style that helps them transition into a cursive writing later on. I had never heard of it and My girls never used it so it would have been completely different than what I showed my girls. Unless you had a child already in the school you and other mothers probably would not even think this was out there. You can find some worksheets on line if you just google Danelian there are several sites. Best of luck. I am sure your little one is right where she needs to be. She will catch on, don't stress yourself out and try to do short little sessions with her and I am sure she will be a beautiful handwriter! The children in the first grade I see have lovely handwriting, alot better than my girls ever had. Being a mom is so stressful, your doing great.

**Tamerama** · 08-17-2007, 03:46 PM

I must say that is RIDICULOUS!!!!! In no way should your child be expected to have perfected writing her name the first week of school!!! I would think that a little practice at home is great but the rest of it is garbage and I would be more than a little steamed myself. My son still wrote some of his letters backwards (occasionally) in second grade and I did much research on it and found that it is perfectly NORMAL and not to be concerned even in 2nd grade....of course they sent him for dyslexia testing..even though that was his only issue. Sometimes I just DON'T get it!!! By 3rd grade it had ironed itself out.. of course we go to a school where in 2nd grade they expect you to read at a 3rd grade level and they act like you are missing some marbels if you are reading at a level acceptable for your age. I could go on... LOL...

**thegemreaper** · 08-17-2007, 03:48 PM

So sorry they told you one thing and are doing another. Just the other day, I was at Jan Brett's site to print alphabet tracer pages for my 3 year old son. I noticed that they now have Traditional and Modern manuscript tracers and I wondered what that was all about.Now I have to wonder which one I should let him use ...

If any of you are interested, here is the link

http://www.janbrett.com/alphabet/alp...acers_main.htm

**Dancing Lotus** · 08-17-2007, 03:52 PM

THis is one reason why I am sending my dd to a charter school. The first three days she will be tested on all skills and they go from there. She will never be held back from the group just becuase she didnt get something right.

**danimarie0820** · 08-17-2007, 07:41 PM

Wow that is ridiculous! There is no reason for the teacher to sit there and make her work while the other children are playing, that really hurts their self confidence. It is normal for a child to regress a little when they learn new things. A child in my room could write her name perfect, well when her mom tried to teach her what the letters were actually called her name is no longer legible. I cant believe that teacher!

**GFNancy** · 08-17-2007, 08:52 PM

Thanks guys!

It sounds like there is a lot of frustration with writing at this age. It is Denelian handwriting, which is also called modern. At least that's what the lady at the teacher supply store where I got some stuff at said. (Only spent $15, which I'm considering an investment.)

If this was happening a month from now it wouldn't have even phased me. I'm glad they have a teacher available for extra help. Some classes aren't as lucky. But I think they should have taken the first week to just let the kids get used to everything before things started getting a little more serious. If I had known, I would have done some more serious work with her in the weeks before school started, just to get a jump on things.

Today she told my best friend ("Auntie") this:

"I wrote my name today Auntie!!!" (all excited and proud). Then she said, "But I don't want to write my name anymore."

Lovely. Burnt out in five days.

She's obviously gotten frustrated. A week ago I was telling her how great she was getting at writing her name, and now the teachers are saying she hasn't been doing it right. I'd be frustrated too. When she gets frustrated, she gets stubborn and plants her feet.

The school she's going to is one of the top public elementary schools in the state, so expectations are high. They also gear their instruction toward getting those test scores high, of course. So on one hand we're lucky to have her in a great school, but on the other hand, I need to make sure she doesn't slip through the cracks or get stigmatized.

I think that it will all work out fine. I'll do some extra work with her and we should be off and running again.

If we're still having one problem after another in a couple of months, I'll push things a little more.

Is it just me, or does anyone else remember that teachers stop caring about what your handwriting looks like (as long as it's easy for them to read) in like, 5th or 6th grade?

So all of this focus on perfectly cloned writing is for what exactly?

If this all completely goes off into a ditch, I'll definitely start looking into charter schools, etc.

For right now, I'm looking at it that I'm homeschooling her with help from the public school. Because in the end, especially with 31 (!) kids in the class, if I just let her float along with whatever the teachers are able to do in class, she's just going to keep getting further behind.

Thanks again everyone for replying. I hope everyone else's school issues iron themselves out too.

Nancy

**Missourimom** · 08-17-2007, 09:20 PM

I'm sorry....things like this are so frustrating. Kindergarten has changed drastically in the past few years...ever since the No child left behind act was passed. Kids just can't be kids anymore and everything is rush, rush, rush. I noticed when my 6 yr old was in Kindergarten, she was learning things my 16 year was learning in the first grade.

**Cricket1** · 08-17-2007, 10:46 PM

Ugghhhh--way to burn a kid out during the first week of school, huh? I would be p'd off, too. My son is going into the first grade and in kindergarten they worked with D'Nealian, too. When the work sheet came home, I was like, what the H@!! is this? Frustrating. I don't have much to add, just that I know what it feels like when you feel your child is being "held out" for what they can't do. Good luck!

**pkellyc** · 08-18-2007, 08:56 AM

Fifteen years ago they didn't like the way my daughter wrote her name.
They kept trying to correct it and it made her so confused that I finally called a meeting with the principal and the teacher. I told them to leave her alone. It's was just her name and she seemed to write everything else the way they wanted her to.
They had her so confused that she also started writing letters backward, which is something she did not do before. As soon as they laid off of her she was fine and had no futher problems.

**Daisygirl** · 08-18-2007, 04:24 PM

Poor little baby. It sounds like they need to get on the same page at that school.

**momof42003** · 08-19-2007, 03:12 AM

Denilian way of writing is a good way to get the kids into cursive, but I too was upset when my first was told she was only drawing letters and not writing them.. She was doing the same thing I had done, and believe it or not, I was writing NOT drawing... Any way things change, but not "accepting" the way she spells her name because of the "legalities" of it is kind of stupid.. DD just worked on it all kindergarten, and still doesn't like to write in cursive or denali.... OH well, now she is in middle school, all the teachers "accept" her handwriting....