Desperate for advice...

**Izzy0906** · 01-02-2008, 01:44 PM

Quick situation... I have a 5 year old little girl. She goes to bed great. No problems there... but she wakes up anywhere from 5-20 times/night. I do the technique mentioned here but here is why it doesn't work... she claims to have to go to the bathroom and gets in hysterics if I don't let her go. She goes and sits on the potty and "pretends" she's going. My daughter sits on the potty 20 times a night. It's insane. Yet how do you tell your child, no you can't go potty when they are hysterically screaming that they have to go have to go. This is what she is using as her excuse to stay up but no matter what I do, she won't stop. I have a night light in the bathroom and told her she can go when she needs and then to get back in bed... except she goes as much as she wants... then wakes me up wanting me to tuck her in and the minute i have her back in her room (not saying a word to her the whole time) she lays in bed for about 5 seconds then throws back the sheets and says she has to go potty again and it starts all over. I've tried ignoring her (she shouts question after question after question) I've tried sitting with her just to have her wake back up and start all over, I've tried punishments, I've tried rewards. I was in tears hysterically last night because I can't take it anymore. I went outside and could hear her screaming so loud i'm SHOCKED the neighbors didn't call the cops thinking I was beating her. This went on for 2 hours straight last night (it's getting worse). She went to bed at 8, got up at 10:30, went potty 27 times (we counted) threw a fit so bad when I finally told her no more potty that we thought Neighbors would call the police and didn't fall back asleep until 12:30. any advice?

**bumplett** · 01-02-2008, 01:51 PM

wow - only thing i can think of is to just ignore her - the only reason she's doing it, is because

1. she can.
2. she's getting your attention

so what if the neighbors can hear her? Don't be afraid of the neighbors - so what if they call the police, nothing the police can do about a 5 yr old that won't go to bed either!!!

**HappyMama** · 01-02-2008, 01:53 PM

Do you think it is possible she might have cystitis, or a bladder infection ? Sometimes it gives the person the " feeling of pressure in the bladder or the feeling they have to go " but can't at that time. I would talk to your Dr. if you haven't to rule this out. I am so sorry you are going through this.I hope you can get to the bottom of it soon and both of you can get a good nights rest.

**yonksgirl** · 01-02-2008, 01:53 PM

I wish I had advice! My DD will be 5 this month and she does the same thing except it is not the potty it is either I am scared or I hate to be alone. We do not know what to do either she gets up at all hours of thie night! Our older DD who is 7 now when threw the same thing at 5, I think it something they grow out of! But man when you are in the moment you can not wait for them to grow out of it! I wonder if is some kind of hormonal change or something that goes on at the age of 5?

**Izzy0906** · 01-02-2008, 01:56 PM

I tried ignoring for over a week now and for over a week now, she screams for over 2 hours a night. You would think that after a week, she would stop. I can only take so much living off of about 3-4 hours of sleep per night and working full time. If the cops are called, fine, whatever, BUT my neighbors have children of their own and I don't need mine keeping them awake. I live in a townhome.

**Izzy0906** · 01-02-2008, 01:58 PM

Oh and I should mention that she used to wake 1-2 times/night and has been doing that for over 2 years now, never was able to break her of that. But the screaming at the top of her lungs, screaming help and hysterics is new.

**stinkbug** · 01-02-2008, 02:00 PM

I vote for having her checked for a bladder infection. It usually flares up and is worse at night. This can be chronic, and incredibly painful.

**lwlynch** · 01-02-2008, 02:00 PM

My suggestion (of course have dr checkout to make sure no medical reason, but I would think that if there is no fever and she is okay all day, then it is a ploy to drive you)
~are you on a daily schedule?
~how long and when is her nap time?
~do you include outside time?
*At my house after 6 we all wind down. That means the most you do is color or play something that is quiet. Then bath, book and tv for a set time, then lights out, goodnight.
*I would tell her, that the whole house is going to bed and you aren't getting up anymore.. then stick to your guns. *Maybe babygate the area so she can only go from her room to the bathroom.
*also steer clear of drinks after 6, and no sugar.
Of course these are only suggestions..
Hope you find some luck..

**yonksgirl** · 01-02-2008, 02:01 PM

I know ignoring would never work for me either. Once they get to the point of hysterics you have to do something! My daughter gets to the point that she can not beath.
I did think of one thing we do but it may only work because Ashley is scared is we let her fall asleep in our room then carry her to her room when we go to bed. Maybe your daughter is using the potty as an excuse to be with you and feel close to you....maybe the bed thing would work for you. It never hurts to try! Best of luck! Let me know what you do end up doing@

**Izzy0906** · 01-02-2008, 02:01 PM

I've had several bladder infections and it never bothered me just at night... but also all day long. During the day.. she's fine, no bathroom problems at all. Even before bed, she's fine, no problems at all. and when I asked her why she didn't go if she said she had to (which I ask all the time) she tells me she lied just to stay up longer. she ADMITS to using it to stay up.

**brenda67** · 01-02-2008, 02:05 PM

I would take her to the Dr's asap! She might have something wrong with her and thats why she is going through this situation every night. I've never heard of any child doing this before. Just for your sanity as well as hers I would have her checked out..Good Luck.

**Izzy0906** · 01-02-2008, 02:10 PM

Ok, never mind. It's too hard to explain everything on here and everyone keeps going back to medical issues. She just was at the doctors 2 weeks ago for her check-up and is fine. She used to do the same thing with the potty BEFORE going to bed and finally broke that (which I spent money taking her to the drs. several times for bladder infections and she never had one, he said she uses it as an excuse cause she know I won't say no). Thanks for all the advice everyone but unfortunately, without spending hours explaining the entire situation and without being there to actually see it, I am on my own. I do appreciate everyone trying to help though!

**carlitasway** · 01-02-2008, 02:14 PM

Then the only thing for you to do is go to the neighbors and tell them you are breaking her from a habit and you apologize in advance if she wakes them up. Either that or let her sleep in your bed.

**justpeachy92** · 01-02-2008, 02:16 PM

At 5 she is old enough to understand her behavior is not ok. If she wants to act like a colicy baby at night and she was my child I would start taking away big girl priviledges. Sounds like your dd is really testing her boundries, or your patience.

**brenda67** · 01-02-2008, 02:28 PM

Originally Posted by Izzy0906

Ok, never mind. It's too hard to explain everything on here and everyone keeps going back to medical issues. She just was at the doctors 2 weeks ago for her check-up and is fine. She used to do the same thing with the potty BEFORE going to bed and finally broke that (which I spent money taking her to the drs. several times for bladder infections and she never had one, he said she uses it as an excuse cause she know I won't say no). Thanks for all the advice everyone but unfortunately, without spending hours explaining the entire situation and without being there to actually see it, I am on my own. I do appreciate everyone trying to help though!

Sorry..most people would think of a medical problem first off..I wish I had advice to your problem but I don't..