Day Care Dilemma

[forHISglory]

Question:
Suppose you had a preschooler that you needed to have day care for. Also suppose that each of the following all had exactly the same price and all served a morning snack, a lunch, and an afternoon snack. Which of these would you want for your child? Why?

1. A private home, where a stay at home mom cares for her own kids plus a few daycare kids.
2. A private home, which takes daycare kids, but there are no kids belonging to the caretaker.
3. A commercial daycare center, not connected to a corporation as a benefit
4. A commercial daycare center, that is connected to a corporation as a benefit to the employees of the corporation (usually in the same physical plant)
5. A church sponsored daycare
6. A government or social services daycare
7. A family member or good friend
8. Daycare attached to a school, such as a college or trade school
9. Other?

What do you look for in daycare? Which of these are important to you? Why? What else would you add? Which of these are of no importance to you and your needs?

1. Safety
2. Structured time/unstructured time
3. Cleanliness
4. Discipline
5. Activities
6. Food
7. Morality of caretaker
8. Licensed
9. Educational program
10. Attractiveness of the facility
11. Cost
12. Location
13. Hours/scheduling
14. Friendliness
15. Size of class or group
16. Amount, type, and condition of toys
17. Sleeping arrangements
18. Smell
19. Age of children accepted
20. Education level of workers
21. Other??

What would you advise parents who are looking for day care?

[kittykatstrong]

The feel of the daycare would be my deciding factor. My DH stays home to watch the kids so we don't have to put them in daycare, but if I had to I would want something smaller so she was not just a number.

[Darlene]

Me or hubby first, family 2nd, good friend 3rd.
I just wouldn't like the thought of my child being cared for by "strangers".

[Momto2Boyz]

I'll share my experiences! My oldest was 5 when I decided to stay home ( a little backwards, I know). So, both of my kids have spent time in daycare centers & private daycare.

First home day care was unlicensed by the state. I had to pay her cash, she had 3 older children (jr. high and up) and she was a wonderful person, but a horrible day care provider. She took kids whenever parents needed her too, so one day I walked in and she had over 10 very young kids there! Anyway, my gut told me to get my son out of there, and as I was looking for new care for him, he had an accident there and got 2nd degree burns. (Not saying home daycares are bad...just saying follow your gut).

2nd home daycare was better. She was licensed by the state, but had problems with her licensing. They suspended it when she had a "domestic dispute" with her 14 year old son. Now, from what I understood, it was strictly a loud argument (not physical) that got nieghbors to call police...but that was enough for me and I pulled my boys out.

The other day care I had them in (they were here the longest) was a non-profit day care. It was phenomenal! They had age appropriate classrooms for the kids, they had loosly based cirriculum for the age groups. It was very much more like a fun pre-school. I really loved it and my kids did too. And I knew they were safe there!

So those are my experiences...take from them what you will. If I was ever to do a home daycare again...it would have to be a friend or family member who I trusted 100% to raise my children.

I think all of the criteria that you have on your list is important. When I first was looking at daycares, I had a checklist that I took with me to my first meeting with them. It looked similiar to your list. You would be surprised at how cleanliness in a home day care can be a huge thing! I am by no means a super clean person...on any given day you can walk through my house and find things out of place, dust bunnies, and dishes in the sink. But those are the exact kinds of things I looked at in a home day care, and if I saw them...I walked away! How horrible is that???? But, that is just how it is, I guess!

[Cricket1]

I would prefer a daycare that was connected to my work (I think that was one of the options)--that way I would always have the ability to walk in unannounced and see how things are going.

Another thing when considering a daycare is the turnover of the staff. Are these providers new or have they been there for years? How long is the daycare able to hold on to these providers. There is one that is close by and they ALWAYS have ads in the paper looking for help. I met someone that worked there once and she said everyone was miserable--therefore, I don't think I'd really want one of my kiddos there.

[McD]

We have only had Wesley in two places, one was a stay at home mom with her own son. We hated it and he was only there for about 2 months. We just weren't okay with the quality of care he was getting there.

After that, he went to registered with the state in-home daycare and she is amazing. I have never once questioned anything that my provider has done. She treats my son like he is her own and she is amazing.

I go by my gut feeling. If I feel like something isn't right, I pull my kid immediately.

[mommy4ever]

As a childcare provider, I always, ALWAYS, tell my families to go with their gut.

What works for one family, won't for another. Depending on hours you're working a daycare facility might NOT work for you, you might need to start earlier, or work later. This might not be an option.

In home care works for many families, but they are definitely not created equal. Some are darn right scary. Others are phenomenal.

So you need to visit and get a feel for the home.

I have steered away from watching friends kids, why? Because there is always strain on the friendship. When it's some one you know there are always assumptions made. "Oh I'm running late, she won't mind". "Oh, I'm a little short this month, she won't mind waiting a few weeks to get paid". Etc. every one that I've talked to has found the same thing. The friendship is really not the same. Same goes with family. The only one I'd consider would be my MIL. I don't trust my mom to do it right. She has some strange ideas sometimes and will act on them, and that scares me. Never would I leave them with SIL and BIL or my brother and Sil.

So see, it really comes down to how the home, the people the caregivers make you feel.

There's no cookie cutter solution to it.

BTW... I currently only have 1 child in care as i type this out and she's sleeping..lol

[baxjul]

I have a daycare in my home. I'm not registered, but I follow the rules for my state. My parents seem to be very happy with my house, set up, and te care that I give. I teach the kids, serve hot meals, keep everything clean, let them have outside playtime, etc. just like the bigger ones. My parents like that it is friendly here, and that their kids love to come here.

[LexTysMommy]

I am a licensed daycare provider in my home. Parents can pop in here whenever they want to, as well as they can in many centers. I have a very relaxed setting which is what I would look for if I was looking for child care for my child. My son was in a daycare center until he was 2. I did not like that fact that every 6 months he switched classrooms and teachers. That made it very hard for us every 6 months for a couple of weeks. I think a family provider that you are comfortable with is the best route, IMO. Because you will have stability that your child needs for many years, and a warm home like enviorment ( not a keep your shoes on all day enviroment).

But your gut is the best judge of any place that you will send your kid for the majority of the day. With the most waking hours, and someone that is a fulltime caregiver while you are away working, trying not to worry.

[carlitasway]

I watch one little girl on a regular basis and get paid for it. I am not liscensed. I have two kids and one is in school fulltime and the other goes to KDO Tues and Thurs. The mother of this little girl is a coworker of my husband who needed someone to watch her kid immediately. The daycare she was in wasn't good. My house has dishes in the sink but is safe. I try to clean as much as possible but to be honest, we are all restless little spirits here. We are usually out doing things. I take her to storytime, the park, the mall play area, the store. We just rather be out and she is so good in public. My cleaning gets to be a little neglected because of that. I've asked her mother if she minded she told me her house is messy so it's not a big deal for her. I was originally supposed to stop watching this little girl next month but we both agreed to extend it to indefinately. This little girl has become like my second daughter. I take care of her just like I would my own. It works for us. Always go with your gut.

[dancar3]

Definetly the feel of the environment is importmant! When my husband was in the military, I had a licensed preschool/daycare in our home. I had 2 of my own children and I could have up to a total of 6 children in my care. Daily menus had to be posted along w/ unannounced inspections to make sure we were eating what was posted along with following the guidelines to proper snacks/meals. I also had to have a daily and weekly schedule as far as activities that another inspector would pop in on unannounced (at least a few times a month) to make sure I was following the schedule and to see how I and the children were doing. I loved my job! Parents were always welcome to stop by and we were always busy. I took all my children to see what a dentist does, police officers, fire fighters, we went to museums, walked every day it wasn't raining, made lots of arts and crafts, sang songs, etc.... So I guess what I'm trying to say, the feel of the place, how the other children appear, what activities they offer, the structure, and basically what ever you're looking for in a day care. Good luck!

[ms. frugal kugel]

Personally I probably wouldn't use a private home situation unless I had a direct connection to the person running it or a very positive referral from a friend. I stayed in 3 home daycares when I was a kid. One lady left us alone with each other ALL DAY while she watched TV, and her young adopted daughter was there too - she had emotional issues. Another lady yelled a lot and her house was dark. And the last woman I adored completely! So I bring my own baggage to that.

My daughter goes to a non-profit "school". They accept all kinds of children unless their temperment is dangerous to the others. They have animals at school, explore a lot in nature and are taught a lot about self reliance and problem solving. I love the school, but it's really pricey. I can't complain because I want the teachers to be paid well for what they do (right now they're short a few teachers but that's another thread) and she won't be in preschool forever. I agree with everyone though, that you have to follow your gut instincts when choosing, or even if you change your mind later. It's quite a process.