confused & a rant

[perSue]

ok i'll try to make this short and to the point.

i received a couple emails from ppl who apologize for what happened to my mother and hope i'm doing well despite it.

i have heard nothing myself.
however, i've gotten no return calls from mother when i have tried calling in the past several weeks.

i checked obits & hospitals, no record.

i have 2 older brothers who i never talk to because they never want to talk to me (there's about 10 yrs difference between myself and my bro's). they never answer if i call and never respond to emails i send.

i've never had a super close relationship with ANYone in my family... (that's a whole 'nother story!). But if something happened, one would think i'd be told... ESPECIALLY since i'm the only "child" in the same state as mother.

for most days i'm happier w/little to no contact from anyone in that family... but i think i have a right to know if something's happened.

but no one's responding. no one's talking to me.
it's like i'm 10 yrs old all over again - the "black sheep" who doesnt deserve to know about family issues.

i dont know really if i'm asking for anything but a "listening ear".

i probably asked for it after all these yrs of virtually no "participation".

part of me wonders why I care at all.
another part just doesnt care to know.

i dont know...

thanks for reading.

[imforpeace]

I just recently lost my mother. I have an older sister who is the big time black sheep of the family. She lost her kids, broke all ties with family and we haven't heard from her in 8 years. {a VERY long story!}

I can understand how you feel though. We had no way to tell her. Don't know where she is. Her kids don't even know where she is.{unfortunately they don't care} I'm sure she will feel pretty bad when she finds out.

I wish you luck!!!!

[dolphin]

perSue, I'm sorry, I haven't been keeping up with the boards for a couple of weeks so not sure of your situation but I'm so sorry that you are hurting. I can't imagine but I am sending you many, many, prayers for the outcome to be good.

[Dancing Lotus]

I'm not sure I understand. You have been getting emails from people saying that something has happened to your mom but you are not aware that anything has happened? When you call your mom you get no answer and no return call? Does your mom normally return your calls? And the people who sent you the emails wont answer you back?

[perSue]

Ann - you got it right.

maybe i was a little short w/details... sorry.

but yeah i always get a return call from mother. not in the past few weeks. i just figured she was busy or whatever an she'd get around to calling back. but now that i think about it... it's been about 3 weeks.

the ppl who've emailed me live in the same town she does... so they'd know if something happened.

i dont know.
i do know that i've never been close to anyone in my blood family. i had a bad life with them and have put that behind me. it's easier to NOT have contact w/them than to be blamed for everything wrong in the world and be told how stupid and worthless i am.

i guess i just feel entitled to know if something happened.

maybe i dont. i dont know.

that's why i'm confused... i dont know if i even deserve anyone's phone call.

[AmyBoz]

If you really want to know, then e-mail back one of the people who e-mailed you and explain the situation.

I can't quite imagine being in your situation, so I hope it works out for you.

[Dancing Lotus]

that's why i'm confused... i dont know if i even deserve anyone's phone call.


My dear, you deserve to know what (if anything) has happened. Call your mother at a later hour tonight so it will be sure she is home. IF she doesn't answer make sure you are clear in your message that you must hear back from her. Then call the police and ask them to check it out. Tell them you believe something has happened and they will go to her home.

I pray this all works out for you , great big hugs. Let us know.

[JustMegan79]

All I can say is that I am thinking of you and that I can't say I know what you feel exactly.

I can say as a fellow black sheep....you still deserve to know, no matter how much (or little) contact you have. Good luck and please let us know whats going on if you find out.

[perSue]

thanks everyone...

so far still no responses.

i'm going on the "no news is good news" and gonna leave it at that.
i cant worry about something that no one will tell me about.
if/when i find out, i'll deal with it then. obviously i'm not part of that "family" anymore, so i'm just -walking away- now.

thanks for your support

[Dancing Lotus]

I am sorry.

[Michelle68]

I'm sorry, this must be really difficult for you. I hope you find out something soon. You definitely do deserve to know what (if anything) has happened.


--Michelle

[POOTERSMOMMY]

PLEASE, PLEASE try e-mailing those people back, that e-mailed you. They must know something and they know how to reach you. Call them (check directory assistance) if they don't answer your e-mail.
I wish you the best.

[mom2bobsarah]

I am sorry that you are in this situation. I do not speak with my Mother at all so I understand about family "stuff". It sounds like something is up and I agree that perhaps emailing people back with a brief synopsis of your situation would be in order. It is possible that something happened and she is in the hospital or something like that (hence her phone and such is still on but she is not there). Calling the police is also a good idea, you can explain your situation and I am sure that they could pop over for a look to make sure all is ok. Good luck.

[LexTysMommy]

I am so sorry. (hugs) I would call police if I were you. just so you know. Tell them what you told us, at least they can tell you if she is safe.

[bumplett]

Whatever you decide to do, best wishes.