It's nice to know that I am not the only one

**kettlecorn** · 06-18-2008, 10:48 PM

who seems to stuggle financially. Not that I want anyone of us to stuggle with money but it is nice to know other people who face some of the same stuggles. It just seems like everyone I know seems to be "doing fine" financially or at least they act like they are. I try not to hide the fact that we are struggling around people we know but I feel out of place sometimes. It is nice to have the support from you guys.

**cissylu** · 06-18-2008, 10:57 PM

I`m here with you Kettle corn. I bought my boy`s some dr. thunder and told them I would not buy any more till next month.
they` just have to drink water or tea.

**shortstack** · 06-18-2008, 10:57 PM

I totally agree. I think some people are just in denial. I mean my husband makes really great money but I have seen the effects of gas, groceries and energy bills on our montly bottom line every month.

Andrea

**MommyBliss** · 06-18-2008, 11:06 PM

I just think some people are in denial and think oh it'll only last a couple of months. The government will bail us out. I just continue to stock up and stick close to home. I am making sure things are okay with my best friend and her family, but the rest want to live in the land of denial.

**Momto2Boyz** · 06-18-2008, 11:26 PM

We have always been pretty open about our frugality with our friends and we were shunned by some of them. We didn't keep up with the Jonse's and didn't do certain things with our friends because we just didn't want to spend the money, wether we had it or not.

We have found in the last year that alot of our friends have opened up to us and come to us for advice now. Come to find out, many of them were spending all this money they "had", only for us to find out they were racking up cc bills and home equity loans, etc. I try not to feel bad for them, and instead tell them to pull up a chair to my kitchen table for a little frugality seminar!

**Drgnfly423** · 06-18-2008, 11:31 PM

Originally Posted by Momto2Boyz

We have always been pretty open about our frugality with our friends and we were shunned by some of them. We didn't keep up with the Jonse's and didn't do certain things with our friends because we just didn't want to spend the money, wether we had it or not.

We have found in the last year that alot of our friends have opened up to us and come to us for advice now. Come to find out, many of them were spending all this money they "had", only for us to find out they were racking up cc bills and home equity loans, etc. I try not to feel bad for them, and instead tell them to pull up a chair to my kitchen table for a little frugality seminar!

I could have written this almost word for word. I have one friend in particular that is really struggling and it is such a surprise. Summer 2007 she spent $10,000 on her yard alone. All on credit! Now they are really struggling. We all are with prices going up, up, up.

**FrugalMomof3** · 06-18-2008, 11:38 PM

I dont have a problem letting people know I shop for the best deals, I dont pay much for things, I am frugal and I love thrift stores and yard sales. My mother on the other hand thinks I am being too cheap but look at all the things I am able to get because I am frugal. I dont rely on government assistance nor for handouts from family. Some months may be harder than others but we make it through, for some because of their lifestyle it's often hard for them to cope, WE ALL have learned what we can do to cut costs and make it. So, we are much more rich in wiseness than others are with money.

I am trying not to go anywhere these days with the cost of gas and I dont mind walking or riding my bike, knowing I am getting exercise AND saving money makes it well worth it!

**rachelMcK** · 06-19-2008, 11:07 AM

I used to keep everything quiet but that was when we were at our worst. I tell people now that I know frugality works. I was talking to a friend the other night, telling her I spent 2 and 1/2 hours grocery shopping by walking to all the store I could and getting their sale prices. She thought I was absolutley nuts. Then when i told her that my weeks worth of groceries cost me $20, she said I had to show her my tricks. I also had another friend show up at my place with every single bank statement she could find to tell her what she was doing wrong. (Its was the daily trips to blockbuster and mcdonalds..lol). But I still have friends that treat me as second class because I can't afford to go to the bar everyweekend or buy new furniture. I don't mind, when it gets me down I log on here.

**freebs** · 06-19-2008, 11:11 AM

i agree, dh works really hard but the money isnt always there. We live 15 miles from the grocery store one way so i cant bike there, walk there or take public trans as there isnt any. So now i make 1 trip per week to the store and that is it. Dh drives to work everyday so if we need anything he will have to get it!

**JustMegan79** · 06-19-2008, 11:15 AM

I have the same situation!

So many people I work with act as if they got money to burn!
Sometimes I wonder if I am insane or behind the curve or something. They all go out every single night to the bars and spend spend spend. I cannot do that and when they start callng me a party pooper....I just flat out tell them I cant afford it.

Then they say oh well its only 2 dollars drinks and I am like so?? I still cant afford it.

But I know we will dig ourselves out eventually but I just dont see how these folks do it unless they just dont care.

**angelbumpkin** · 06-19-2008, 11:45 AM

Have the same issue here. Some friends are totally in denial about their money situation. We have another family that is beggin me to help them figure out where to cut corners. I plan to help them this weekend when we take them out some food.

**lanford66** · 06-19-2008, 11:53 AM

I understand completely. I work w/2 women and they go out every day for lunch. I bring leftovers or sandwich & eat in every day, but Friday and thats my lunch day w/best friend (one of the ladies I work with

) I get "flacK" all the time about staying in. I probably could go out w/them, but I choose to use that money to pay off my debt. Sometimes they look at me like I'm nuts, but thats ok. I don't have any car payments, home equity loans or who knows what else. I won't lie, and sometimes it does bother me, but I just let it go knowing what I'm doing is best for me and my family. This is a choice that me and my DH have made.

**Iwant2BDebtfree** · 06-19-2008, 12:25 PM

That is what is so great about forums like this. We are all on the same team and understand what it is like. I couldn't find anyone who had this mentality in my daily life. I have friends who are clearly in debt and can't pay their bills, but are real quick to buy a tattoo, or say lets go to the casino and spend the night...THIS is why they are in debt. I get on the same pattern sometimes but have learned how to quickly get back on track...hanging out here helps that a lot

**nuisance26** · 06-19-2008, 01:05 PM

~I'm not sure if they're all in denial, some probably are. It seems more likely to me that many people are still spending wildly because they believe things will not get better and they'd rather have a great time for a short time than be stable for a longer period of time.~

**Starlight9803** · 06-19-2008, 01:20 PM

This is why I love this forum so much!

Lots of my friends and relatives either blow money left and right (which they probably don't really have the means to do), or act like they aren't struggling at all (when I know for a fact that they are). I'm open about my frugality, but I do get pushed aside sometimes because I don't meet them out for dinner and drinks, or go to this or that event all the time. I have better uses for my money, when I can even afford to do those extras. Coming here I find common ground with people. Some of you are much worse off financially than us, some are much better off, but the support and advise here is what keeps me coming back.