What Was the Lowest Financial Situation....

**many houseapes** · 07-11-2009, 12:44 PM

that you found yourself in....and what frugal tactics did you do to survive it? After reading the "I Like Being Poor" (thanks momof2joys

), I was sitting here remembering some of the hardest times that we went through as a family & the things that we had to do just to survive. I would love to hear your survival stories

**nodmicks** · 07-11-2009, 01:33 PM

When I was pregnant with ds I was on bed rest for placenta previa the last 4 months. I had previously been full time and made more than Dh. No income for me! The small t shirt manufacturer dh worked for went to 15-20 hours a week but told the guy if they tried to get unemployment they would be fired. If they picked up another job and couldn't be on call 24/7 to come do shirts at any time they would be fired.

We were very young , naive, scared and believed every word of it.

Thankfully our mortgage was land contract with family and they let us pay half and make up payments later. We paid the light bill , the car ins, gas and shut the phone off. Dh and I pretty much lived on oatmeal and potatoes. We had about $12 a week for groceries and used most of it to make sure our other child got milk, fruit, protein etc. Looking back I see that was unwise as I sure was underweight, lost tons of weight during that pregnancy but did have a nice healthy big baby. I was sick as a dog 24/7 and being wiser now I think that part was from stress.

Eventually Dh found a better FT job (still wasn't making much but better!) and I went back to work FT less than 3 weeks after having my son. That was a rough 4 months!!!

Looking back we really should of told our families how bad it really was and let them help us. Anytime they asked we said it was ok. It wasn't. If I could give anyone advice in a tough situation it would be to swallow your pride and let those who care about you know what is going on instead of trying to act like it is fine!

However after Dh and I went through that as young adults and young parents we sure can take everything else in stride. It made us planners, and savers. Everyone said I was so calm last fall with dh losing his job and being the main bread winner. Sure I was we had already faced far worse as young adults and now knew you got unemployment!

As long as we have shelter, food and our family all is a ok! Extra money and material things can come and go. Being fed , having shelter and being with those you love is all that really matters.

Do I ever want to go through living on under 500 again? Heck no! But it is good to know we can pull together and be survivors!

**frugalfranny** · 07-11-2009, 05:35 PM

Originally Posted by nodmicks

Looking back we really should of told our families how bad it really was and let them help us. Anytime they asked we said it was ok. It wasn't. If I could give anyone advice in a tough situation it would be to swallow your pride and let those who care about you know what is going on instead of trying to act like it is fine!

But this is VERY OFTEN easier said than done. I very seldom asked for help when raising my daughter as a single parent.

One time it meant putting her back on formula when she had just started regular milk about a month before...(had no money for milk, but had two cans of formula left in the cupboard) I 'allowed' the babysitter to give her milk while she was there......just to extend the use of the formula. The sitter was nice enough to send me home with a bottle of milk a couple times.......using some excuse for it that I don't remember know. (she realized how broke I was)

The other time was when a landlord raised the rent and I knew I wouldn't be able to afford it.....BUT.....had no money for deposit on another place either. We were 'homeless' for about two months...lucky enough to stay with friends.....the hardest thing I have ever done.....allowing the assistance. Then got into another place. Was too stubborn to even ask a new landlord to work with me on the deposit....who knows if they would have..... I didn't ask!
Part of the reason was.......(and this will SHOCK the youngsters on here)........landlords could REFUSE renting to you if you had children!!
So...I had a hard enough time finding a place with a kid.....I wasn't about to admit that I had 'money issues' too!!

**hmcart** · 07-11-2009, 05:57 PM

sadly enough our lowest was very recently...Dh lost his job last year and we lost our insurance with it. Having a son with previous medical issues made it very difficult to get insurance for him. We found ourselves in a situation where we had to choose between insurance for our son or keeping both our cars and our house. We knew that one of our cars had to go but the value of the car was far less than what we owed on it. The only way we saw to get out was to file bankruptcy which meant we would surrender the one car but we would also be free of the medical debt we had from our son also. We had been unable to pay anything to those after dh lost his job. It was hard for us because we didnt have credit cards or any major debt other than the car and med bills but we did it and it was officially discharged last month. We did learn that we need to learn to live on one income so that in the future something like medical debt or loss of income doesnt put us in that situation again.

**mauimagic** · 07-11-2009, 06:22 PM

Interesting question that sent me back fifty years when my family was so poor that we ate rice topped with tomato sauce and chopped onions. Guess we were lucky to have a sauce on it.

**nodmicks** · 07-11-2009, 07:57 PM

Originally Posted by frugalfranny

But this is VERY OFTEN easier said than done. I very seldom asked for help when raising my daughter as a single parent.

One time it meant putting her back on formula when she had just started regular milk about a month before...(had no money for milk, but had two cans of formula left in the cupboard) I 'allowed' the babysitter to give her milk while she was there......just to extend the use of the formula. The sitter was nice enough to send me home with a bottle of milk a couple times.......using some excuse for it that I don't remember know. (she realized how broke I was)

The other time was when a landlord raised the rent and I knew I wouldn't be able to afford it.....BUT.....had no money for deposit on another place either. We were 'homeless' for about two months...lucky enough to stay with friends.....the hardest thing I have ever done.....allowing the assistance. Then got into another place. Was too stubborn to even ask a new landlord to work with me on the deposit....who knows if they would have..... I didn't ask!
Part of the reason was.......(and this will SHOCK the youngsters on here)........landlords could REFUSE renting to you if you had children!!
So...I had a hard enough time finding a place with a kid.....I wasn't about to admit that I had 'money issues' too!!

I know it is likely easier said than done. If I had it to do over again I would have let my folks buy groceries or even applied for help. My nutrition during that pregnancy was deplorable and my weight very low I feel blessed to have gotten such a healthy baby!
It is hard to take help for lots of us. I had no idea someone could refuse you for having kids!
Just think how tough we all get from making it through hardships.

**mamamia** · 07-11-2009, 09:32 PM

Originally Posted by nodmicks

I know it is likely easier said than done. If I had it to do over again I would have let my folks buy groceries or even applied for help. My nutrition during that pregnancy was deplorable and my weight very low I feel blessed to have gotten such a healthy baby!
It is hard to take help for lots of us. I had no idea someone could refuse you for having kids!
Just think how tough we all get from making it through hardships.

Hind sight really is 20/20 isn't it? But all's well that ends well, and whatever doesn't kill you, really will make you stronger

I'm so happy your baby was healthy.

Hugs!!

Theresa

**phoeny_moonstar** · 07-12-2009, 01:51 AM

When I was a teenager, my mother and I were living with her brother, his wife and their daughters. My mom had just lost her job and was applying for disability, my uncle quit his job because he wanted to move to a different house (even though they didn't have to pay rent or mortage on the one we were living in). My aunt was the only one with a job. My mother took care of all the household stuff, and my aunt supported everyone financially. I remember several times there only being 4 cans of tuna in the house and we had to save it for the baby (she was like 2-3?) to eat and the rest of us went hungry. IO have vowed since then that I won't go hungry again, and will always try to save up something for food at the very least.

**cmdarlin** · 07-12-2009, 10:10 AM

Many already know my story... We are still going through our hardest time. I lost my job a year ago February 2008 and then DH was diagnosed with MS April of 2008 and lost his job too because he couldn't go back to work. We lost our home but were lucky that the bank agreed to a short sale. Lucky for us I had found this site and learned about stockpiling which is still carrying us right now.

Our house sold and luckily prayers were answered when we met an old farmer who had an old farmhouse he basically gave us rent free for four months until we could get situated. My dad helped us with groceries. Thanks to friends like 'forHISglory' we found a new church and made several friends.

We are still struggling but things are looking up. DH's ss disability was finally approved last month and I had an interview for a part-time job on Monday. We still have cc debt hanging over our head from a card that was cancelled over 2 years ago but hope now that I have a job opportunity maybe we can get that paid off. (you can imagine what the interest is on it).

God is blessing us and we are learning not to take things for granted and take the days one by one.

Debbie

**cab54** · 07-12-2009, 01:05 PM

Not as bad as some peoples, but felt bad at the time......

I met dh when he was a college student of 19---- and I was 18, saving to go to school. We worked terribly long hours to afford tuition, and hardly ever saw each other, or sleep. Neither of us had many clothes and they were old. Both skinny--no $$ for food, and too busy to eat. We dated 5 years this way, and went to exactly ONE sit-down-and-be waited-on nice restaurant in all that time.

Other time was in 1986 when dh started his own business. We put almost all that we had saved into it, just left enough in the bank to live on.....barely. We had a 2 year old, and I was PG for #2. We didn't see appreciable income for a couple of years. We eked out a living......eating very frugal meals, ....and it's a good thing the boys were little, so they didn't know how cheap Christmas was.

I made all of our gifts to everyone else. Everything for my babies was hand-me-down or borrowed. Cribs, clothes..all of it. Or gifts.

DH didn't know sometimes just how bad the situation was at home, cause he was so stressed out getting the business started, I didn't let on too much. But by the 3rd or 4th year, we were doing pretty well.

**known2him5** · 07-12-2009, 02:46 PM

We've had several hard times over the course of our marriage. I think the worst was when dh had to quit working due to his disablility -- so six months of NO income from him, 3 kids to raise. . . I sat down to pay the bills one day and we had less than $11 for gas and food for 2 weeks.

Me and the kids started walking the roads "for exercise"" and along the way we'd pick up aluminum cans that I could sell for $$ and buy milk, etc. I honed my forage skills and we ate all sorts of wild stuff -- told the kids we were learning about pioneer days, etc. . . . other than work, we didn't drive at all. . . canceled every subscription, etc. I did carpool a couple days with some coworkers. . .

AND I swore we'd never get that low again . . .I keep a stockpile of common grocery items, an emergency fund for small things. . . a savings for longer things. . . . and we keep our survival skills up to date by foraging, fishing, hunting, gardening, etc. all the time now.

**sunshine** · 07-12-2009, 07:02 PM

We've also had several low spots, financially over the years.

My dh had a farming accident that left him unable to work for several months, I ruptured my appendix and got gangrene, while pregnant -

So we brought a preemie baby home from the hospital, having had no income for a few months, had used up all our savings. Once we went through the hospital diapers, we had NO DIAPERS, we had no bassinet, no baby clothes. . . nothing . . . and very little food in the house.

I signed up for WIC which got us at least some food. . . I used dish towels for diapers and bread wrappers for plastic pants. . . I cut up an old sheet for diaper shirts and made a palate for the baby in the bottom of a dresser drawer.

I accepted any and all offers of excess garden produce and learned to cook some unfamiliar items. We picked up dropped fruits, cut around the bad spots and ate that -- also made jams and jellies with the peels, pits, etc. I planted fast growing/late growing garden items (baby was born mid July).

We learned to use a solar oven ( and continue to use one to this day).

**heartofmine** · 07-12-2009, 07:33 PM

The hardest times were when my children were small. We lived in a 10'x45' trailer in my inlaws yard. We had no phone, no water, (we hauled it in gallon jugs), cloth diapers since we couldn't afford pampers except for a few to use when we went to church, grocery shopping, etc, (had to wash them on my hands with water heated from the jugs). My husband worked long hours but made very little money. We had 1 daughter and unexpectedly and not planned we had one on the way. Had lost our health insurance just after our daughter was born through my husbands work as the owners had messed up and got into a fraudulant insurance company and still were paying 80% of my daughters bill. I did get WIC for my daughter and without it often I would not have had anything to put on the table. I had to water down her milk to make it last all week. We drank water and lived on macaroni and peas. When I went to the Health Department and found out I was pregnant they took me into a room and told me I needed to apply for medicaid and food stamps or we were not going to make it. I'm a proud person and was raised to take nothing. For the sake of my children I put my pride aside and did what they asked. God always saw us through even in the leanest times. I owe everything to Him. We lived in that little trailer for 6 years. It was through God's grace we were able to finally buy a home. He made it possible. There is a story about that but I'll stop here except to add.... The greatest thing I ever saw was water rolling right into my kitchen and being able to flush a toilet without carrying water. I'm positively spoiled now being able to take a shower and a tub bath. Heaven on earth.

**WV_mom_of2** · 07-15-2009, 10:05 AM

We are going through out toughest time right now. When my grandma passed away in 2005 I just went crazy with grief. Dh went back to work, the kids went back to school and I was left alone all day. So I shopped to get out of the house and not think about my grief. The credit cards were maxed out (and no, I didn't do it all. When dh realized I had relaxed my hold on them, he went a little nuts too LOL). We are now working on paying them off slowly. We also have one of those nasty adjustable rate mortgages that are always in the news. Wells Fargo sends us paperwork galore to do this and do that and help us out. We fill it out, send it in, and they turn us down! They won't refinance or modify the loan, etc. NOTHING! So we are struggling to catch up on the payments by ourselves before I get laid off for the winter. Gas hit 4.29 a gallon last year and the price of food went crazy which doesn't help.

Since January we have had an outside water line break that cost us 800.00 to repair, the washing machine went out and the new one was 500.00, my fridge went out and I found a used one for 225.00, and the water heater went out and that was another 300.00. I can't get us caught up because of all the extra crap!

Now it's time for back to school shopping. My 13 year old ds has grown two inches this summer so far and needs new jeans and tennis shoes. And they both need the usual school supplies. My stockpile is very low and I'm working to build it back up before I get laid off this winter.

We have borrowed 6000.00 from my parents to pay off one credit card. I HATE that! We won't be doing Christmas this year except for our two kids and our parents.

So far it hasn't been as bad as the other stories here. I read them and am in awe of all of you! However the stress is very bad on my health. I don't sleep, I eat constantly because I'm so stressed out, my IBS has been really bad this summer, etc. And I found out this week that my boss is cutting my fall hours to pay his new pool manager(a position he filled KNOWING he was getting no funds to pay for it). So my weekends for the month of October are probably gone.

**FrugalMomof3** · 07-15-2009, 11:46 AM

I would have to say mine was a few years ago when my credit cards were racked up and I had lost my job and DH was the sole provider. We just had enough left to feed the kids after paying the bills and mortgage.

We ate lots of Top Ramen or Mac & Cheese but we made it through this ordeal. Even today I realize how we made it on so little and I am amazed.

Today, while things are a little better, DH is working less hours but we are making it and have a little more left over than years ago. We have minimal credit card debt but even now having the minimal CC debt, it's killing me as I've been so good not charging things, I want to cry and I only owe around $2000.

Makes me think even nowadays, when I go shopping if I really need this or can it wait. We do however, still eat Ramen Noodles or just spaghetti sauce and spaghetti at times but it's out of preference.

Some people can change their way of thinking and spending and then there are those who get in over their head, I vow NOT to be knee deep in poo-poo.