(warning: vent ahead!)
I placed this in the 'financial hardship' section because it seems that my ex labors under the delusion that I live in a constant state of financial hardship.
He also seems to think that I'm starving DS18, who is his son. (DS12 lives with the ex.)
Apparently, during our recent visit to see DS12, when DS18 was spending time with their dad, there was a conversation that kind of went like this (I wasn't there to hear it):
EX: "Son, you're not eating enough - you're so skinny! Is there enough food at your mom's house?"
DS18: "Yeah, Dad, there's food. I just don't feel like eating much lately."
EX: "Boy, you sure are skinny. Listen, are you SURE there's enough food in the house?"
DS18: "Yes, Dad, I'm sure. We're fine."
EX: "Well, listen. Don't tell your mom I said this, but if you ever need money for food, I want you to call me. I'm serious - call me, and I'll send you money for food."
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OMG. I mean....O-M-G. I'm angry beyond words at this latest insult of his. What's worse is that I can't say anything to the ex about it, because then he'll know that DS18 said something to me about their "private" conversation, and he'll take it out on DS18 - guaranteed.
What the ex DOESN'T know (and what gives me a great deal of personal satisfaction) is that he's never, ever been able to keep DS18 from telling me what they talk about - especially the things that he says "don't tell your mom" about. I don't even have to ask - he tells me, because he feels it's unjust and inappropriate for his dad to expect him to keep secrets from me. DS12 is another story, since he lives with his dad, and is terrified of displeasing him, but DS18 will tell all, because he doesn't have that great of a relationship with his dad.
When the ex called to talk to DS18 the other night, I REALLY wanted to rip into him about this. But I didn't. Because I don't want him to know that DS18 told me about their conversation. But it really, REALLY ticks me off that he has the nerve to say that I'm not keeping enough food in the house for DS18, and that's why he's so skinny. The kid is just naturally skinny - he was a skinny baby when he was born, almost no body fat. He became a chunky baby but then slimmed right back down again when he started walking, and has been very slim-built ever since.
There is ALWAYS food in this house. No, it's not the junk food and sodapop that DS18 would like it to be, but there is good, healthy, nourishing food - all that needs to be done is to prepare it. There is always meat in the freezer, veggies in the freezer & cabinet, bread, lunchmeat and condiments for sandwiches, milk, eggs, etc. There is sometimes a little less food than I'd like to see here, but there is always something to eat, even if it's not exactly what we'd like. For instance, we may end up having breakfast for dinner (pancakes, eggs & breakfast meat) if no one took anything out of the freezer for dinner, instead of, say, lasagna. But we eat, and we eat well. Not lobster and caviar by any means, but we have food, and plenty of it.
Maybe if the ex made more of an effort to see DS18 a little more often, he'd realize that.
ok....:nrant: rant off. Sorry, just had to get that off my chest.
I placed this in the 'financial hardship' section because it seems that my ex labors under the delusion that I live in a constant state of financial hardship.
He also seems to think that I'm starving DS18, who is his son. (DS12 lives with the ex.)
Apparently, during our recent visit to see DS12, when DS18 was spending time with their dad, there was a conversation that kind of went like this (I wasn't there to hear it):
EX: "Son, you're not eating enough - you're so skinny! Is there enough food at your mom's house?"
DS18: "Yeah, Dad, there's food. I just don't feel like eating much lately."
EX: "Boy, you sure are skinny. Listen, are you SURE there's enough food in the house?"
DS18: "Yes, Dad, I'm sure. We're fine."
EX: "Well, listen. Don't tell your mom I said this, but if you ever need money for food, I want you to call me. I'm serious - call me, and I'll send you money for food."
----------------------
OMG. I mean....O-M-G. I'm angry beyond words at this latest insult of his. What's worse is that I can't say anything to the ex about it, because then he'll know that DS18 said something to me about their "private" conversation, and he'll take it out on DS18 - guaranteed.
What the ex DOESN'T know (and what gives me a great deal of personal satisfaction) is that he's never, ever been able to keep DS18 from telling me what they talk about - especially the things that he says "don't tell your mom" about. I don't even have to ask - he tells me, because he feels it's unjust and inappropriate for his dad to expect him to keep secrets from me. DS12 is another story, since he lives with his dad, and is terrified of displeasing him, but DS18 will tell all, because he doesn't have that great of a relationship with his dad.
When the ex called to talk to DS18 the other night, I REALLY wanted to rip into him about this. But I didn't. Because I don't want him to know that DS18 told me about their conversation. But it really, REALLY ticks me off that he has the nerve to say that I'm not keeping enough food in the house for DS18, and that's why he's so skinny. The kid is just naturally skinny - he was a skinny baby when he was born, almost no body fat. He became a chunky baby but then slimmed right back down again when he started walking, and has been very slim-built ever since.
There is ALWAYS food in this house. No, it's not the junk food and sodapop that DS18 would like it to be, but there is good, healthy, nourishing food - all that needs to be done is to prepare it. There is always meat in the freezer, veggies in the freezer & cabinet, bread, lunchmeat and condiments for sandwiches, milk, eggs, etc. There is sometimes a little less food than I'd like to see here, but there is always something to eat, even if it's not exactly what we'd like. For instance, we may end up having breakfast for dinner (pancakes, eggs & breakfast meat) if no one took anything out of the freezer for dinner, instead of, say, lasagna. But we eat, and we eat well. Not lobster and caviar by any means, but we have food, and plenty of it.
Maybe if the ex made more of an effort to see DS18 a little more often, he'd realize that.
ok....:nrant: rant off. Sorry, just had to get that off my chest.