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Hoping someone has ideas to help

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5K views 30 replies 27 participants last post by  miss_cas 
#1 ·
We were doing okay until August when my Father passed away, and with him went his pension check. So it's just my mother drawing Social Security, and it's not covering everything. I cannot work a regular job due to poor health - I have good days and then there are bad days where I can't move. Daughter is not in school - we home school due to autistic tendencies so I can't really leave her for long either. No car - we use city bus or walk.

Income: $880 Social Security
Food Stamps: $367 for 2 adults and 1 child

Expenses:

Mortgage and Taxes $726 {we are 1 month behind on this}
Home Insurance: $124
Electric: $369 {this includes $101 that is a split payment from August, will end in December. Our Average is $200 a month}
Water: $49 {will go down in April due to seasonal billing for rates}
Cell: $105 {2 lines, total unlimited. We use the cell phones a LOT for calls}
Cable: $89 {includes internet, basic cable, and home phone with lifeline. We cannot get TV here without basic cable}
HBA: $50 {includes everything non-food stamp}
Medical needs: $100 {includes diabetic supplies, prescriptions, etc}
Bus Pass: $30

So we have almost double going out of what we have coming in. Any ideas for at home income sources or ways to cut back further?
 
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#2 ·
Not sure where you are located and what your weather is like, but $200 seems high for the electric. My 3 BR 2 bath home uses half that, and we have weather extremes (hot hot summers, cold miserable winters) Are you unplugging things, keeping lights off when not in use, etc?
 
#4 ·
We are in South Texas - very very very hot summers. I try to keep lights off as much as possible, but as we are home most of the day they tend to be on. I need to set up surge protectors to turn off some things. I think a large part of our electricity is going towards charging a power wheelchair and our 3 deep freezers.

I'd get rid of the cells... My house phone is $20 with long distance and I spent $20. on minutes in Sep. for my Trac phone.

I'd get rid of the cable. My husband and I just moved to the States and when I saw how much cable was ($30./mo) I about died and said no way. I did buy an anntena and converter box, that way he can watch the local channels.

I'd see about trying to sell or rent out the house and finding something cheaper. You and your mom could share a room, etc.

HBA seems really high. I use that in about a year for a family of 5. Although, I only wear make-up 3/4 times a month. Join some FB groups that tell you when and where to get the "free" stuff from Walgreens, Rite Aid, CVS, etc.

Electric, turn OFF the AIR or HEAT. Yes, you will be hot or cold, but put on more or take some off. Don't use your dryer AT all. You should see a reduction soon. Unplug EVERYTHING. I even unplug my oven, but it is easy to get to ;)

Do you have a working budget? There is nothing in there about clothes, life insurance, etc. If your mom were to pass on, there would be no income correct? It is a must, if so.

I'm sorry you and your family are going through this. Maybe try to make gift baskets for the holidays? You could use coupons, sales, and your food stamps to make themed baskets. Italian with spaghetti sauce, noddles, olive oil, etc. A movie basket, romantic date night, and so on. You could make these with mostly your food stamps and still feed your family. Good luck, I hope you find something soon.
We can't get anything with antenna here - it's cable or nothing. Home phone with long distance here is $50, so we are considering going to one cell and just local on the house.

We can't turn off the a/c - I already have had it turned up to 78 and that is the highest Mom can tolerate without getting sick {she has heart problems and cannot do heat}. I think the high average may also be in part due to having had a log of medical equipment running over the last year for my dad, so I expect the average to go down as time passes.

HBA is an estimate - I coupon shop so it varies highly. I also buy anything I can get cheap or free with coupons and sell it at yard sales for profit which is my only income currently. The HBA also includes clothing, which comes from $1 day at our local thrift 2 blocks away. We have no life insurance - too many health problems.

We don't even do gifts anymore for Christmas, other than my daughter and her's all comes from the thrift or Blue Santa. I've tried doing the gift baskets before and no one here buys them - 98% of our community is on food stamps as we live in a poor side of town.

As for renting something cheaper - we are currently waiting for the section 8 housing list to reopen and then hopefully move into that. It's the only thing cheaper than staying here, as 2 bedroom apartments here go for $800 and up - the joys of living in a college town!

And yes - if Mom were to pass away I'd have next to no income. {I make around $2000 a year with yard sales}. I need to find something I can do from home on good days to bring in income.
 
#3 ·
I'd get rid of the cells... My house phone is $20 with long distance and I spent $20. on minutes in Sep. for my Trac phone.

I'd get rid of the cable. My husband and I just moved to the States and when I saw how much cable was ($30./mo) I about died and said no way. I did buy an anntena and converter box, that way he can watch the local channels.

I'd see about trying to sell or rent out the house and finding something cheaper. You and your mom could share a room, etc.

HBA seems really high. I use that in about a year for a family of 5. Although, I only wear make-up 3/4 times a month. Join some FB groups that tell you when and where to get the "free" stuff from Walgreens, Rite Aid, CVS, etc.

Electric, turn OFF the AIR or HEAT. Yes, you will be hot or cold, but put on more or take some off. Don't use your dryer AT all. You should see a reduction soon. Unplug EVERYTHING. I even unplug my oven, but it is easy to get to ;)

Do you have a working budget? There is nothing in there about clothes, life insurance, etc. If your mom were to pass on, there would be no income correct? It is a must, if so.

I'm sorry you and your family are going through this. Maybe try to make gift baskets for the holidays? You could use coupons, sales, and your food stamps to make themed baskets. Italian with spaghetti sauce, noddles, olive oil, etc. A movie basket, romantic date night, and so on. You could make these with mostly your food stamps and still feed your family. Good luck, I hope you find something soon.

Edited to add: I just saw where you had a house phone too!! Get rid of the cells, FAST! You probably only need one Trac phone for right now since no one works. Just leave a note when you leave the house where you are going and when you'll try to be back, etc. Or when someone leaves the home, take the one prepaid phone with you. Try not to use it AT ALL to cost less in minutes. Only for emergencies.
 
#7 · (Edited)
If you can't work due to poor health, is there anyway for you to get SS disability? If you previously worked, you shoudl qualify for it, since you paid into SS. Also, does your mom qualify for SS survivor's benefits from your dad? I am not exactly sure how they work, but you could at least ask someone. Which brings up my next point, have you spoken to someone in Social Services? I would think they would be the best to try to help you find solutions and that is what they are there for, to help people who need it. They should be able to give you resources for assitance with electric, food , public transportation, ect. There is a lot out there that people don't know about until they ask. If you are a member of a church, that is another good place to check in with. They often know or offer assistance, and it is typically given on a more local level.

We have Vonage phone, which is $30/mth and it is free long distance anywhere in the US (it runs off of internet). We both have family out of state, and it is the only way we could afford to call them. How about going to 1 cell phone, esp if it has long distance? I just don't see how you need 3 phones??

You can also stream a lot of things over the internet for entertainment and use Netflix DVD services instead of having cable. We got rid of cable last year bc the cheapest package was $50/mth. We didn't like it at first, but now we can't imagine spending the money to go back to cable. This way you get TV and internet in one. and maybe for less money?

You are doing a great job with the yard sales, $2k a year?!?! That is so impressive. Last one I did I barely cleared $100.
 
#8 ·
Dump the cells, you have a home phone with your cable package.
Lower your cable and internet if you can or dump the cable and just do home phone. Internet is free at the library and books can be taken out too. Instead of TV (since it gets nothing without cable) read your borrowed books.
Since it sounds like you're living on your mom's SS, have you applied for disability, since from your post it sounds like you have existing medical conditions? Have you tried vocational rehab? Sometimes they have outreach programs that can work to find gainful and flexible employment for those with disabilities.
Wishing you much luck.
 
#9 ·
#10 ·
Have you tried applying for SSI for you and your daughter, also contact your electric co and see about a budget, contact DHHS and see about getting a lifeline phone, this is free if you get food stamps, etc. I got a free phone and 250 minutes a month.

We do not have a landline phone, instead since we have internet we have the magic jack, as long as we are on the internet we have phone service works great.

The home insurance is that a year or monthle, can't it be included in mortgage and tax.

The cell phones cost a lot, we have straight talk phones and unlimited phone, internet, and long distance for $45 a month each phone.

Maybe go to food pantries we get toiltries, etc. and every 3 months cleaning supplies. Keep us posted.
 
#11 ·
Can you bring in a boarder to pay you some rent?

Put the kid in public school, and she'll get free lunch and likely breakfast too.

Start a business. You know you can get ordained a minister by the Universal Life Church and start officiating weddings; people will pay hundreds of dollars for you to officiate a wedding and more for you to run a reheasal for them. I did thatseveral years back, and charged $200 to do a wedding. Texas allows this, by the way.

Offer babysitting, house cleaning or dog walking services.

TV is a luxury, not a necessity. And as has been pointed out, you can watch tv online.

If your home phone doesn't include long distance, ditch the cells and get an internet phone like magicjack.

Do you use a clothes dryer? Line drying can save you money if you don't do it already.

But the bottom line is that you have to bring in more money. You cannot cut enough to make that budget manageable.
 
#12 ·
I would check to see if you qualify for safelink. Since you receive food stamps and social security I would think you would. This way you can cancel your cell phones and still have access to a free cell phone. Start communicating with people over the internet. You have the service so start making use of it.

See if your mother can receive survivor benefits. Apply for social security benefits for yourself and your child. It sounds as if you may qualify if you are unable to work for medical reasons. See if there are any other utility programs that you can apply for.

At night before bed make sure everything is turned off/unplugged that can be.
 
#14 ·
okay - just hitting the high points in replying as there are many.

Mom is getting survivors benefits already - that's the $880. It's the most she can draw according to Social Security.

I do not draw SSI, and have been told that I fall in a "grey area" i.e. too disabled to work a regular job, but too healthy to draw SSI. They aren't sure what I have yet but it resembles fibromyalgia.

Daughter doesn't draw SSI either for the same reason - she does not have a formal diagnosis of Autism due to not meeting enough critera. She is fine {gifted actually} as long as she is not put in a group setting - in groups she melts down. Her doctor says if it continues past the age of 10 then she should qualify, right now she is 5. We are NOT putting her in school for this reason - it would be much more work and trauma to her and me both.

We have lifeline on the home phone, which is basically safelink for home lines. Can't get both lifeline and safelink at the same time. Worked it out and found it's cheaper to have home with long distance and 1 cell than 2 cells and no home. I must have 2 phones as I need to be able to be reached quickly by my mother who is babysitter for my daughter when I have to leave the house. We tried magicjack - my mom who is 64 can't use it as she is helpless when it comes to computers so it doesn't work for us.

Home insurance is monthly and cannot be included in mortgage {we tried it - they were forever late making payments}

Toiletries and food we have no problems with getting - I have been a coupon shopper for years and we have food coming out of our ears as wells as cleaners, etc. Only thing we still have to buy is paper products and pullups for use at night.

The reason we have 3 deep freezers is we buy in bulk as I find super cheap deals. I do plan to downsize to 2 freezers as soon as we get one emptied.

I've considered taking in a boarder, but with our bad neighborhood I'm wary of renting since the only available room would be right next to my daughters room. If it comes to it I will, but it is a last choice. I am looking to start some type of business - I used to sell books online but quit as I wasn't making enough to be worth it.


I think right now I'm going to work on cutting all expenses I can and working on getting that electric bill down.
 
#17 ·
I think right now I'm going to work on cutting all expenses I can and working on getting that electric bill down.
Do you realize that you have all of about $30 left after your housing expense? And you've said you cannot really find any place cheaper to live. If you stay in this house, it doesn't matter how much you cut other things, it's not going to be enough.

Sorry to sound harsh, but you're not being realistic. And I'm hearing a lot of excuses for why you cannot live without one thing or another. For example, I do not see why you have to be able to be contacted instantly when you mother is home with the daughter. They have a home phone and can dial 911 if there's a serious emergency... people lived without instant communication for millenia before we invented cell phones, and they did ok. And even a 64 year old can be taught to how use magic jack, with a little patience (I have it, you pick up the phone and dial just like she used to do in the 80s).

You either have to find a cheaper place to live, or you have have to bring in more money. Period. Honestly, you probably need to do both.

One option is to stop paying the mortgage. Live in the house until the bank throws you out. Save up a little money in the mean time. In this climate, you could end up staying rent free for years. Maybe section 8 will open up for you before you get kicked out.

Start looking at housing options other than apartment complexes. You may be able to find a mobile home (or small house, or older condo) to rent from the owner for much less than $800. In my area a 2 bedroom apartment in a complex will cost you about $900, but I know lots of people who rent other settings for MUCH less than that.

Moving into an $800/mo apartment saves you $50/month. It may also save you a a good amount of money in electric, as it may be better insulated than your house. I just moved from a house into an apartment in June. My electric bill in the apartment has been about $80/month lower through the heat of this Florida summer.

Your financial situation is fairly dire. Cutting your electric isn't going to do it for you. You need to take more drastic measures. Sorry, but it's the truth.
 
#15 ·
~What is keeping you in your current location? Why not move to where there's less competition for apartments?
I concur with dropping the cells and cable. You can't afford them right now. I'd even go so far as to sell the tv and any players and movies you own.
Your home insurance is ludicrously high. Why? Shop around for something lower.
And as a homeschooling mama myself, this will sound harsh, but you need to seriously consider putting your daughter in public school so you can go to school, job training or work.
You haven't specified the nature of your illness but a good 50% of the people in the workforce are people who deal with chronic illnesses and pain. Holding a job with an illness is very possible! Are you in treatment for your condition?
You say "we" are homeschooling so I take it your mother helps out? You also don't specify where your daughter's other parent is and whether or not they financially contribute to her upbringing. I'd explore that avenue of income if I were you.~
 
#16 ·
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#18 ·
Second the above poster

It's time to let the house go. You can't afford it. Furthermore from what you are saying it isn't even in a great neighborhood for your daughter to grow up in. The upside is that since you aren't working and since your daughter isn't in school you can probably move with minimal disruption to your lives. Your mom will still be able to collect what she collects whereever you move to. With only $880 to spend though you definitely are going to need assistance. Even the lowest housing markets(texas) are running at over $400 which would eat up over half of your monthly income.

I know that people like yourself are in a catch 22 because if you work in pain then you are told that you are capable of working but if you don't work then you are looking at an extensive wait to qualify for disability and most people can and do go broke waiting to qualify for disability status. (My neighbor has mitochondrial disease that was originally diagnosed as fibro and it took her 2 years to qualify and even then it took intervention by Congressperson).

I wish I had a magic solution for you but sadly I don't see saving 20- 40 dollars here or there as something that will save the house, not with what you have coming in and what it requires($800).
 
#19 ·
wow, you have a lot on your plate. sending good thoughts and prayers your way so that you can find the right answers.

i agree w/ other posters...get DD in a GOOD public school district..that way you can at least find a PT job and bring in some $$$ while she is at school.

i dont agree w;/ posters about getting rid of cell phones...imho...i think they are needed for safety reasons. especially if you live in a not so good neighborhood.

what about section 8? have you applied? alot of nicer neighborhood landlords are now accepting. just look into a better school district and go from there. jmho.

best wishes to you and your family.

what about medicaid?

i know that angel ministries is going to be obsolete..saw it onthe news...but what about another program like it? have you tried your local churches for assistance?
 
#20 ·
Depending on the cell provider you may be able to switch your cell phone to a pay as you go plan. Put 25 bucks on it and use it for emergencies only.

This may have been asked, but why are you not collecting child support? Maybe someone here can can advise you in that.
 
#21 ·
Well pretty much all advice has been stated. So here is a hug! Once you hit bottom the only place to go is up.
***HUG***
 
#22 ·
I might have missed this but have you applied for help paying your electric bill. I'm not sure how you apply for the funds but anything would help.
 
#23 ·
Well, there isn't much I can add but for a couple of things. First my condolensces on losing your dad, I'm sure that as much as it leaves you all in a tight spot, you probably miss him like crazy.

Next, you said you are a section 8 wait list. Call your state Housing Authority or go online to their website. Make sure whether or not your state/community has only one master wait list vs. each agency/local housing authority/individual property having and maintaining their own wait lists and depending up areas could move more quickly than others and make sure you are on Voucher Program or your state's equivilent again making distiguishing whether or not it is one list or each community Housing Authority maintains their own waitlists also find your local community action program agency and find out if they have a voucher waitlist as well as do those lists have preferences i.e homelessness or being on the verge of such. Most likely you will need a voucher or your mom will need to be open to living in a multi family setting as most senior housing is not set up for children. Good Luck and huge hugs.
 
#24 ·
put your daughter in public school. get her certified as special ed and in a co-teach class with two teachers.

you get a job.
 
#26 ·
Without dismissing your daughter's needs, I agree getting your daughter in public school, with the right help, would be beneficial for everyone in the long run, including possiby freeing up some time for you, or your Mom, ideally both of you, to find at least a part time job (I didn't catch your Mom's age or health status in the posts, don't know if it's possible). You cannot live as you are! The other thing I don't think I've seen yet....have you consulted with a lawyer to help you get disability? I have heard some will not charge unless you are approved- something to look into to. Shaving off $50 a month is not going to solve your issues. I hope a solution that makes sense presents itself to you so your family ma move onto more secure times.
 
#25 ·
Not employed with a child? Wouldn't you qualify for FIP? Shouldn't your dd's father be paying support?

Since you're behind on the mortgage and have no way of making the payment on $880 a month, you will be moving in a few months due to foreclosure so I'd suggest you start looking for a place now. You need to know what rent is going to cost before you can decide what else you can afford. Your mother would likely qualify for senior housing but that would leave you and your dd out in the cold.

Frankly I don't see how 3 people will be able to live on $880. Rent alone for 3 people likely will eat up most of that. If you can manage to eat for the amount of your food stamps, you'd still need money for everything else. Cable, cell phone, Internet, even house phone are all likely too expensive. Start cutting the freezers down to one. Its unlikely you'll have room for one let alone 3 in a rental. Start selling all extra furnishings and anything else that won't fit into a rental and save the money for rental deposit and moving expenses.

You are faced with some hard decisions and hard choices. You will be homeless through foreclosure at some point in the coming months. It may be necessary to find your mother a spot in senior housing so she at least will not be homeless.

I agree with putting your dd in school. She will get the help she needs to adjust. You need to find a job or get onto welfare or you will be homeless unless you have some other family who will take you in.
 
#27 ·
Right now with unemployment thousands and thousands of people have applied for disability so best case scenario for disability is one year to 18 months to first hearing maybe longer.

This may seem harsh but I really wonder why an adult woman with a child is still living off her parent especially when said parent barely has enough to survive on her own.
 
#28 ·
First my condolences on the loss of your Father. If it is not to nosy how old are you? Depending on your age and location you may qualify for some job training due to your income with something like Job Corps or the like. Also working over night in a hotel in mainly a sit down job and your daughter would be sleeping.

I know a few with very young kids that have gotten the Autism diagnosis. So it definitely is done. That helped them get in home therapy do they could have a few hours to pursue a PT job like driving a school bus being a crossing guard, a dog walker etc. Are you crafty? I have a few friends that sell on Etsy and do ok.

I have to agree with a few others your mortgage is way to high. Your cell phones are way to high. I agree with the suggestion to keep the home phone and go to cheap prepaid cell. That can be done for about $10 a month.

I didnt catch what part of the state you were in. We have a friend in the Dallas area that pays $450 for a 3 bedroom. She did lots and lots of digging to find it. I mean lots! She found it through a church.
 
#29 ·
Not sure why people are advising you to let the house to into foreclosure without knowing if there is equity or not. If there is equity in the house you can sell it and get some money to work with for a while. If there is no equity then letting it go into foreclosure while you live there for a while and save a bit makes sense.

Where is child support $ in this mix? If it is not being paid then you should take the steps to get it. Also, pubic assistance other than food stamps. There has got to be programs that are out there that you are not using to help with electricity, etc.

Regarding home schooling a kid with autistic tendencies - my son has Asperger's syndrome and it is likely that I do as well. We are both products of the public school system. Yes, there are problems with bullying that comes with the territory, but it can be managed.

I agree with others that you have to figure out a way to work with illness. What you are doing now is not sustainable and you have to improve both sides of the equation. It will take more than budget cuts to do the job.
 
#30 ·
First of all, I am so sorry you are going through such a rough point. It sounds like your in a very stressful situation and pray that some light is shed on a good path for you and your family soon.

So, right now, you and daughter are living off of your mother's income, correct? That has to change. It really isn't fair to your mother to have to support 3 people on an income that can barely support one. I know that sounds harsh. I am a mother and I'd do anything for my children so I do get it, but from an outsiders point of view YOU need to come up with a plan to take care of you and your daughter aside from your mother's money even if you live together. If I were you, I would sell the house and move somewhere with a better school system. Put daughter into public school where she can get the assistance she needs from people qualified to help. This will free up time for you to work during the day and bring in some sort of income. You could even get a job at the school working her hours. You might have to move to a one bedroom apartment and share with your daughter or something, but in the long run you need a plan that doesn't involve mom's money. I understand not feeling well- I have similar issues. But you may have to push through them. Apply for disability, but know that you will probably get rejected first and it may take a while. Good luck to you- I'm sure this is very difficult. Cut as many corners as you can, but really it isn't going to solve the issues until you come up with a larger master plan for your life. Good luck!!
 
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