Hard times are a coming for us...

**Tiajean** · 02-22-2008, 09:29 AM

So, as we speak, DH is quitting his job. He does not have a back up job right now. He has just put applications in this week, but nothing with the promise of pay yet. I told him two weeks ago to quit the job as they are asking him to do things that are not safe and things that are not humanly possible, like having to drive well over the speed limit with a truck full of propane and working 10 hours a day 7 days a week, telling him he's NOT ALLOWED overtime, but still has to put the hours in and STILL getting berratted for not doing enough. It got the worst this weekend when I found him convincing himself to take his own life. Nothing is worth doing that over, especially a job. I had him call in sick Mon and Tues, he worked on Weds and was told that he was going to have to work even more OT to make up for the days gone. Then he really did get sick yesterday and had to call in again. He went in for 8am this morning and the CSR laid into him (she is the main reason why he's working 7 days a week. She is so unorganized, it's crazy. I've went down there to help her get more organized for free before) and he snapped and said he had it. He came home and emptied his tools out of the truck he had and I drove him down to drop off the truck and get the rest of his tools out of the other trucks. We came home and got his work shirts and the keys, cell phone, etc and he headed back down to resign and hand in his work things.
Now, I get to sit here and worry... Income tax will be put away in savings just in case there is a move in our future or he can't find work for a while. The income I make only makes up for 1/3 of the household income. I work from home so I have to have internet and phone. My phone is paid up until August, so I don't have to worry about that, but I do have to worry about the rest of the bills... Unfortunately, I am being pretty darn frugal now and we are spending what we make. I am going to have to go over my budget and see what I can cut back on. Food will probably be the first thing....
I'm sorry for my rant but some of this stuff I just can't discuss with family or friends. DH is my best friend and I can discuss this all with him, I just need a place to sound off right now as I'm so worried!
That it from me for now. Thanks for listening!

**Tiajean** · 02-22-2008, 09:33 AM

BTW, not to make my DH look like a dead beat for doing what he's doing...
He does not do this on a regular basis, he sticks with his jobs and only leaves them for advancement/higher wages and plans it out. He has been sticking with this job for 4 years of not doing good enough and working his butt off and working for free at times. This will be the first job he has not given a two week notice at in any of the jobs he's had.
Just wanted to clarify...

**suki** · 02-22-2008, 09:37 AM

I understand.

Have him file unemployment TODAY. Even though he quit, he may still qualify because he had good cause connected with work to quit... maybe. But, it's certainly worth filing the paperwork and trying.

Does he have any documentation to back up her unreasonable demands or any co-workers that would be witnesses? If so, he needs to get that stuff ASAP. If he is awarded unemployment, they will appeal and he will need this to stand up in the appeal.

Don't panic, be calm... think positively about solutions and try not to worry (it's a waste of time anyway). You will be okay.

**momofslg** · 02-22-2008, 09:43 AM

I'm so sorry to hear that things are hard for you right now.

You know that NO job is worth taking your life for.

I would report the company to the labor board, you are not allowed to make someone work for no pay. Not only that, it is extremely unsafe to be doing that type of job and be required to work those hours. I also believe that OSHA has requirements, maybe a call in to them too.

I am glad to see he quit.

I hope that things work out for you all.

**ktsmama** · 02-22-2008, 09:46 AM

Sending good vibes your way!! Good luck to the both of you.

**suki** · 02-22-2008, 09:50 AM

momofslg has a great point about the Dept of Labor and OSHA. Also, filing these complaints will bolster his unemployment case...though, ideally he should have filed them before quitting. I think he could still make a case.

**Samigirl** · 02-22-2008, 09:51 AM

Sometimes the worst situations can bring about positive changes. Years ago, my husband quit a job that was eating away at his sense of well being. I encouraged him to quit, even though he had no other job lined up. It was a scary time for us, because we were living paycheck to paycheck. He was only out of work for two weeks...then got a job he enjoyed, with much better pay. No matter what the outcome is for you, nothing is worth the risk of losing your husband to an accident or suicide. It sounds as though he really has no choice but to quit. I have no great words of wisdom, I just wanted to tell you to hang in there and be strong. I'll pray for God's provision in your life.

**many houseapes** · 02-22-2008, 09:51 AM

Tia, I believe that it is against the law for anyone to work overtime & not be paid for it. Did you save any check stubs that could verify this? If you have, talk to a lawyer & see if you can take this company to court for ripping off their workers. I am so sorry that you have to go through this. Stay strong, I am sure something better will come along. 2 years ago we found ourselves in a similar situation. My dh's co. didn't like it that he valued his family- a supervisor went as far as to tell him that if it wasn't for his family, he would be more productive.WTH? But yet they were always bragging about his abilities. He stuck it out for 8 yrs & the co finally got rid of him & others that had families.It was a very scary time for us. You're already making plans how to weather this-you'll be okay

**Lady_V** · 02-22-2008, 09:51 AM

I know what you are going through *hugs*

**dancar3** · 02-22-2008, 10:50 AM

Sorry to hear that you are going thru this. I don't have any great advice that hasn't been said already except that my dh went thru a similar experience at his last job. He was making excellent money (I didn't have to work), but he was being asked to install phone-tapping systems on certain phones in the building, getting calls all hours of the night and weekend and HAD to go in and fix their computers even though they shouldn't be there working to begin with.......this job was 45 minutes away and sometimes we would go w/ him to help him out, and so many other things I'd rather not print. Anyway, he finally had it and so did our family since he was very depressed for a few years due to this job, we discussed about him getting another job. He did wind up working for a different company and taking about a 40% paycut but after a year, he's moving to a different position and getting a great raise, but most of all he's happy, he's treated w/ respect, enjoys what he does, and he works only a few miles from home. I guess what I'm trying to say is that sometimes we don't know why certain things happen and it can be upsetting and scarey, but in the end it works out the way it should be. I wish you and your dh much peace, happiness, and strength.

**cab54** · 02-22-2008, 11:13 AM

Tia, your dh does NOT sound like a deadbeat!

My dh was in a job (years ago, he is retired now) where their goal was to mess with everybody's head. It was really getting to him, and thank God they laid him off permanently before he had to go and quit. He was very depressed by that time. They also made them do things that almost anyone would call unethical and immoral.

I hope he gets something soon that will be good for his well being and your bank account.

**Dancing Lotus** · 02-22-2008, 11:26 AM

I believe he is doing the right thing by quiting. I am amazed he stuck with it for four yrs. And you did the right thing by encouraging him to do so.

**perSue** · 02-22-2008, 11:32 AM

i'm sorry to hear about this happening to you.

:hugs2::hugs2::hugs2:

**powerfm1** · 02-22-2008, 11:35 AM

I ran a National Job Problem Hotline and here is what I would tell a caller about this situation.

1. Illegal overtime - Dept. of Labor, Division of Wage and Hour, it is a violation of federal law.
2. File for unemployment because of a "constructive discharge". This means that the employer made it impossible for him to do his job.
3. National Transportation Safety Board handles regulations for truck drivers in regards to hours, miles etc. It also sounds like this company is violating these federal laws also.

Your husband was being abused. It was an untenable situation and he is saving his life.

Good luck to the two you - there will be a better road ahead.

**fuzzybunny** · 02-22-2008, 11:56 AM

It sounds like you made the right choice. I will be praying for you and I hope he finds a new, better job quickly. I agree with everyone one about contacting the labor board. I did this once with an employer who was making us clock out an keep working. About 6 months later I got a check for back overtime out of the blue. Apparently they were investigated by the labor department because of my phone call and made to pay everyone their owed overtime.

Christine