Trying to get out of the money pit.

**Suzee** · 07-26-2008, 10:07 PM

My Sister-in-law's husband has stage 3 colon cancer and we have been sending any extra $$ we have to them, as they are having a rough time. We have also had some setbacks, here, (I.e...fridge died, car troubles, etc...), that have used up every bit of OUR small extra fund and emergency $$$. We now have NO back up and are trying hard to use as little cash and credit cards as possible. Our credit debt has run up again, as I had a death in my family and had to fly out at short notice. Also, my stepson's fiancee lost the twins she was carrying and has lupus. I just put down my 20 year old malmute mix on Thursday evening. Hubby is working, I am not. If I do go to work, that will put us in a lovely higher tax bracket and zing us with taxes. I'm not quite sure what to do. We are also trying to scrape together enough $$ for me to take on a trip to Germany. My mother gifted the trip and she is also going. I don't need a lot of spending $$$, and I will try to save as much as possible. Hub and I have discussed our dilemma and it just frustrates both of us. We have agreed to be as low key as possible and then really clamp down when I get back from the trip. The malamute had a bladder problem and I was cleaning the house 24/7...even shampooing carpeting in the middle of the night. I think the other dogs would be okay if I got a part time job. BUT...what I would make would be a little more than what our taxes would be. It pretty much negates itself. We rarely eat out and look for bargains at Costco or the local supermarket. We freeze a lot of things and then use them at a later time. I don't drive my car as much as I used to as it is an SUV. Hubby has a Saturn for going back and forth to work. We paid cash for them, used. We keep them up and they are in pretty good shape. We have priced car/house/etc..insurance for the best bargain without putting ourselves in a coverage bind. We don't use a lot of water or a lot of electricity. We have cut off cable for just basic TV and Internet. If anyone has any more suggestions, I'm all ears...well, eyeballs.

Thanks!

**G'MaDebbie** · 07-26-2008, 10:15 PM

I have no suggestions, just hugs and good wishes....sounds like you have been thru a lot lately.

**macemesmum** · 07-26-2008, 10:46 PM

Ok hugs and prayers to you to, have you read the thread about a mum spending 800 per year for groceries with her 3 children, she does it by couponing and has a blog going that is listed in this section, I dont live in usa so im not sure how hard it is but maybe check her blog out if you could do something similar that would save you lots of money im guessing

**cissylu** · 07-26-2008, 11:21 PM

I just wanted to give you a hug. thing`s will get better.

**cheles2kids** · 07-27-2008, 09:15 AM

Gosh, it sounds like you've been put through the ringer lately.

First off, I would suggest taking a little time for yourself before making any decisions.
I think when we "have our backs to the wall" we sometimes make rash decisions and then later on we realize it wasn't the right one.

I had to have a pup put to sleep 1.5 years ago, and I know what a heartbreaking situation that is. It seems like the pain will never end.
My heart goes out to you.

As far as finances go, I know alot of people here will need more information from you in order to help you more in depth, but just some things to get you thinking.
For myself I would first set down and write everything out, all the bills, and income. That will give you a clearer picture of where everything is goin and what, if any money you have left.
Then see from that if there would be any areas to cut back on.
I know you mentioned your shopping habits, but depending on what your buying at Costco, maybe you could cut that back or even cut it out altogether temporarily?
Do you have a discount grocery store near you? Save-a-Lot, Aldi's, Discount Grocers, a bread outlet? Anything that could save you money, even if it's only on certain items?

How are your grocery shopping trips set up? Do you use a cooking menu, do you shop with a list, do you shop weekly, bi-weekly, do you use coupons? Do you have a stockpile, etc.?
All of these could help you.

As for the cars, you did good paying cash for them both, but if you go back to work, would you be driving the SUV?
If so, could you make enough money to even break even, with the gas prices the way they are?
If you go back to work, would you be willing to downsize to a smaller car, that might make it more affordable for you in the long run.

I would also suggest looking around the forums, read as much as possible and continue asking questions. There are some wonderful people here who have been through situations very similar to yourself and know firsthand what your dealing and which direction to go next.

Also try to take care of yourself as much as possible, it sounds like your taking on alot right now.

**KKCondrey** · 07-27-2008, 09:29 AM

Sorry to read about what all you are currently going thru.

**DonnainME** · 07-27-2008, 09:49 AM

My heart goes out to you. Just keep saying to yourself "I will get thru this".

:hugs: to you

**nuisance26** · 07-27-2008, 10:42 AM

~I'm sorry to hear you're having such a rough time. Do you have anything you could sell? Any collectibles, videos, games, furniture, housewares, sports equipment, clothes??? Hope things start looking up for you soon!~

**Marie78** · 07-27-2008, 12:13 PM

I'm sending hugs and good thoughts. It sounds like you are going through a difficult time right now. Don't forget to give yourself some time to relax each day to help with the stress.

**nodmicks** · 07-27-2008, 12:40 PM

Sending you a hug and good wishes!

**Jskell911** · 07-27-2008, 02:25 PM

I also have no real suggestions. Just wanted to say how sorry I am that you are dealing with all of this right now. Perhaps some breathing room while away will help.

**missmanny** · 07-28-2008, 01:11 AM

Firstly, the world needs more people like you who would help out a family member in need.

I hope that you start to have some good news soon as opposed to so much bad news.

Secondly - take the trip, spend the time with you mother and take some breathing room for yourself. All the problems will be ok while you are gone and you and hubby can takle them when you get back.

**Suzee** · 07-29-2008, 06:30 PM

First I'd like to thank you all for the warm wishes. There were some good suggestions and I am looking around the forums and other areas. My husband and I have 2 stocked freezers, a stocked pantry and another small closet that has the pasta, rice and dried beans in it. (All sealed tightly after having been frozen for 2 days.) We are eating off that and just supplementing with fresh produce or hub's milk/my Silk, occasionally. As for selling computer games, video games, cd's, dvd's, etc... I do not have a problem with that. There is a bookstore, Hastings, close to here, that will buy things back. Unfortunately, hub is adamantly against doing that. He feels that he spent good money on them and refuses, ABSOLUTELY REFUSES, to part with anything...even his old computers. I have tried that route before. I am hopeful that he will loosen up in the near future. I am still tacking in subtle and not-so-subtle hints. So, keep your fingers crossed. Thank you, again, to everyone.

**Ceashels** · 07-29-2008, 09:11 PM

Hugs to you. You have had a lot of things on your plate and I hope things get better soon.

Are you able to do things like bake for other people? Basic cake, bread or cookies that your neighbors and friends would pay for so you can have some pocket money? Pitch it to them as a bake sale so you can visit Germany. Who knows, they might enjoy having a cake delivered to them once a week.