What are your stumbling blocks in frugality?

**imagine** · 05-25-2010, 10:20 AM

What makes it hard for you to be frugal? What are your stumbling blocks?

I use to be more frugal. I realized that my stumbling block to frugality has become finding places or people to repair things, if the things can be repaired at all.

Example: We use to have Hubby's dress shoes (worn daily to work) resoled when they wore out. Can't do that anymore. First shoes that can be resoled are harder to find as rubber not leather soles tend to be the norm. We had been lucky enough to have a Cobbler in my hometown but he died and now we know no cobblers.

Also, in our old town we knew a man who knew everyone LOL. If you wondered who could fix something like a window or a washing machine he would know whom to recommend. They would generally be private companies or individuals, who did excellent work the first time. They also tended to charge less then bigger companies.

With things often not being repairable anymore and not knowing specific people who are fix something this has definitely become a stumbling block to my frugality.

**jas** · 05-25-2010, 10:40 AM

I would say dd. Dh and I can do with pretty well with being frugal. Dh is thrifty thrifty and is very handy with fixing things. Then dd will come along and need this or that or want to go and do. She is learning, but has a ways to go. When it is her own money she does not want to let go of it.

**Greebo** · 05-25-2010, 10:48 AM

Originally Posted by jas

I would say dd. Dh and I can do with pretty well with being frugal. Dh is thrifty thrifty and is very handy with fixing things. Then dd will come along and need this or that or want to go and do. She is learning, but has a ways to go. When it is her own money she does not want to let go of it.

Sounds like DD starts using her own money for "needs and wants" now and when its gone, its gone.

**imagine** · 05-25-2010, 11:56 AM

Originally Posted by Greebo

Sounds like DD starts using her own money for "needs and wants" now and when its gone, its gone.

My parents did a version of this when I was a pre-teen/teen.
I was given X amount a month for everything (except room and board - food from the fridge and lodging provided- basic hygiene supplies provided too as well as medicine and medical care)

Mc Donald's out with friends only if I had the money.
See away games out of my pocket (home games were free for students)
Clothing out of my pocket ( I quickly learned that I didn't need so many articles of clothing. I also learned to ask for needs not just wants for Christmas and Birthdays)

You get the idea

It was a great opportunity to learn.

haven't started that with my children but they do have to spend their own money on wants (From gum at checkout to new gaming system and everything in between). Currently Buddy is a saver and has almost saved enough to buy a Wii (which he is going to share with the family) and Little Miss is a spender wanting to buy little things at the store gum, $1 toy ect., although if there is something she really wants she does save up. She bought her own American Girl doll. She did not chew much gum during that save up time. Hmm maybe she just needs to see a goal. hmmm

**stormie11166** · 05-25-2010, 12:22 PM

My stumbling block is eating out. It needs to stop but it so hard to do especially when I tired after working all day and then go to school at night. But my dh and I are challenging ourselves to see how long we can go. I'm very frugal when shopping though sometimes at little to frugal.

**frugalfranny** · 05-25-2010, 12:35 PM

I would say two main things:

moneywise........it is my hobbies and this is my worst financial struggle.......no discipline!! I can 'justify' most anything but do shop the sales....?see the justification??

The other 'bad habit' that I am seriously working on is: not wasting produce. My dehydrator has helped with this but I have a ways to go. I don't waste much other food but the produce can 'get away' from me.

**krbshappy71** · 05-25-2010, 01:14 PM

Social and anything my daughter wants. If friends want me, I'm there. I don't have frugal friends. I've turned down a lot of social but it makes me feel more depressed. Eventually they stop calling because they get turned down. I've suggested other activities but no one bites. Guess I need to find me some tightwad friends.

**frugalfranny** · 05-25-2010, 01:32 PM

Originally Posted by krbshappy71

Guess I need to find me some tightwad friends.

This is a tough one krbs.......I went through that too. It mainly involved going out to eat. I love going out to eat, but will not ALLOW myself to 'afford' to go to Olive Garden or Outback every time I go out to eat.

Amazing that a couple friends I 'lost' now come back to get ideas from me when they need a frugal idea........times have changed for them now and they are 'scrambling to catch up'..........DUHHH!! Think I will call them and see if they want to go to Olive Garden!!!

**craftypam** · 05-25-2010, 01:34 PM

My biggest stumbling block is just like ff crafts and at this time of year FLOWERS. So glad the flowers are only for about a month.

There is an excellent book that I wish I would have found out about when my ds's were young to teach them about money. It has 2 names; the one I can think of is the Sink or Swim money program. Similar to what imagine was talking about. Teaches them to magage money and when its gone you are done spending. Something totally lacking in our society today.

**krbshappy71** · 05-25-2010, 01:35 PM

Originally Posted by frugalfranny

This is a tough one krbs.......I went through that too. It mainly involved going out to eat. I love going out to eat, but will not ALLOW myself to 'afford' to go to Olive Garden or Outback every time I go out to eat.

Amazing that a couple friends I 'lost' now come back to get ideas from me when they need a frugal idea........times have changed for them now and they are 'scrambling to catch up'..........DUHHH!! Think I will call them and see if they want to go to Olive Garden!!!

Oh, and as I'm sure is the same with you, its not that I truly lose them, we talk at work and on the phone but the invites are gone, I hear about the socializing at work that I missed out on, and I miss that scene. Yes, its all the eating out and "FAC", and work gatherings that I turn down.

**IntlMom** · 05-25-2010, 01:38 PM

dh is my biggest problem!!

Out of one side of his mouth he SAYS we need to save money.... but then he always wanting to go to Starbucks, or go to Costco "for a few things"... a few hours and a few hundred dollars later (if I'm lucky) he's back to saying "we really need to cut back".... gee, YA THINK???

**frugalfranny** · 05-25-2010, 02:02 PM

Originally Posted by craftypam

My biggest stumbling block is just like ff crafts and at this time of year FLOWERS. So glad the flowers are only for about a month.

YES...in the spring my garden can 'take control' of me.....but I guess I included that in 'hobbies'.....if I stay out of the 'fun' nurseries (read the ones that carry the 'unusual') I can do pretty good.

Originally Posted by krbshappy71

we talk at work and on the phone but the invites are gone,

I don't play that 'game' well........so they get a 'chilly response' from me. It is almost like "rubbing your nose in it"........I would simply give them a smile and say "how nice"........or "I am so happy for you".....and they would know it was FAKE!! There are a few 'ice cubes' when they now call/email for advice.........I don't miss friends like that...........they are FAKE anyway......you either 'take me as I am'..........or don't take me!! And that means FRUGAL.......you can be frugal and still have a good time.........go out.......be sociable.

go out with them.......if it is drinking......order coke.......if it is something else; adjust accordingly. I have gone to restaurants ONLY because I wanted to go along........and ordered a salad!

**jas** · 05-25-2010, 02:33 PM

Originally Posted by Greebo

Sounds like DD starts using her own money for "needs and wants" now and when its gone, its gone.

She really does not have all that much of her own money. Right now her main goal has to be to finish school. She by no means gets everything she wants. A lot of the expenses are just the cost of raising a child.

Just when you think you have all the catagories covered something comes up. Something is needed asap. Not that the money is not there it just would be nice to keep it longer.

**Greebo** · 05-25-2010, 02:37 PM

Originally Posted by jas

She really does not have all that much of her own money. Right now her main goal has to be to finish school. She by no means gets everything she wants. A lot of the expenses are just the cost of raising a child.

Just when you think you have all the catagories covered something comes up. Something is needed asap. Not that the money is not there it just would be nice to keep it longer.

One thing DR said he did with his kids was they figured out how much money they spent on each kid for clothes and whatnot, and started giving that amount to them each month, saying, "This is for clothes. Buy what you like, but it has to meet with our approval, and if it's all gone in 5 minutes, that's IT."

That's more what I was thinking about - budget a set amount for school things and its up to the kid to make the money last.

**frugalwarrior2** · 05-25-2010, 03:19 PM

DH-Sometimes he gets so cheap it costs us money. Like,we have been w/ Sams Club for years he got a cheaper membership thru his mothers business $35. I think. Costco was $50. premiere
$100. So for the sake of $15. I missed cheaper prices and better quality stuff for years. I am trying to talk him into the premiere membership but he won't go for it even through someone said Costco will refund the diff. if you don't save. Costco has coupons that are sent to us. His mother has been recieving the coupons from Sam's Club.