Does your family support your frugality?

[Mojjo]

Not your immediate, in your house family...but your extended family.

My mom thinks it's "cute" but is baffled when I would charge card spend with her and now I think she's a little ticked because I don't really have the gas money in the budget to come visit her.

And my dad thinks it's "smart" except when it means my sister won't get an expensive store bought present for Christmas.

DH, SS, and DS are fine with it and DH is a real partner in it...but for the rest of my family it's a foreign language.

[PrairieRose]

Well about 1/2 of my family does and the other thinks that we "roll in the money" It's funny too, b/c the ones that think that are the ones who could use the advice I have to offer and won't even think of it.

Dh and my dparents are very supportive (now...it's taken Dh years and years) but our dk's think I'm silly and then my extended family are in the dark about so much of it.

[mommy2many]

Everyone on both sides of our family thinks we are nuts they are all spendthrifts without children

[slowtypinwoman]

No, my family doesn't like to hear about my thrift store finds. Their "Ick Factor" is way too high. Although at least now when I go visit my dad when we are out he'll take me to the thrift stores. He waits in the car. Omaha has the best thrift stores! We don't even mention it to Dh family. Dbil would laugh at us when Dh would go through his cast offs. He is a MAJOR clothes horse, realy $$$$ stuff. I would just tell Mike when we were alone that BIL would laugh at us and HE paid full price for all that stuff we got it free. Some of them still had the tags on.

[Telephus44]

Both my family and DH's family are supportive - they were both very frugal when they were starting out (although they have since changed financial status and are no longer nearly as frugal as they used to be) so they understand what we are going through.

The only thing is that our in-laws see it as something that we'll "outgrow" when we have established ourselves, finally make enough money to afford good "new" things - whereas DH and I see it as a total lifestyle we plan on keeping permanently.

[dwallyfam]

My Dad loves it. We challenge each other to see what we can do. He is also receives a lot of things I get for free.

My inlaws on the other hand think we are not frugal enough. Since we actually have cable and use our heat. They are very critical of what we do.

[Persimmon Lace]

My side of the family is pretty frugal anyway so we're not much different from them. My mil and dh were pretty poor during his life time and his dad was kind of a skinflint ungenerous type, so they had to be frugal to do anything. My sister and I love to hit the flea markets and the garage sales, we shop second hand for Christmas and birthdays too. This year for my bday she got me a pair of 60's vinegar bottles that I admired at the flea market, I was thrilled! When I find cute snowmen for dsis or giraffes for my sil at the sales/flea market I buy them and save them up. On of my best finds for dsil was a set of 3 wisemen from one of the oldest gift shops here in town, at garage sale, I gave them to her for Christmas. Both families like handmade gifts and they give them too. I think I'm pretty lucky!

[Renee-2kids]

My parents understand.
My in-laws either blame dh and think he's stingy with money. Or they feel sorry for us that we are so poor. Neither is true. We just make different choices.

[owiebrain]

We don't live near any extended family and don't talk to them much so I doubt most of them have any clue about our lifestyle. If they did, though, I'm pretty sure they'd (most of them) understand. DH and I both come from poor families so I assume frugality is a given.

[frugalfarmwife]

My mother understands our situation and encourages me, my older brothers are wealthy and look at me as the "failure little sister" but let em, at least I'm happy and enjoy my life and lifestyle.

Hubbies family just looks at us like we're aliens, they call us "the Amish branch of the family" Hey, if by that they mean we enjoy the land and the simpler things all the better. They have the best/biggest/newest AND the bills that come with it. They're so busy working that they don't get the chance to even enjoy their kids!

KJ

[AmyBoz]

I don't really think that my parents get it. They are spenders through and through. However, my father-in-law raised 4 kids on his own and definitely loves my frugal ways. My one sister-in-law is into it, my other one thinks its kinda cool, and my third could care less. Dh is on board, though, and that's really all that matters.

[slowtypinwoman]

Amy,
The fact that you paid off your home equity load so darn fast speaks volumes on its own.

I would love to be as disaplined as you are!

[pammy]

I think my family is getting sick of me bowing out of stuff because I don't want to spend extra money. And I quit trying to keep up with them, so I'm no longer impressed with their new possessions. Everything is a contest to some of them. It's those that have the high bills to prove it, yes. 'No, I don't want to go all out with Christmas lights this year. We might or might not hang the ones we already have.' I get the rolled eyes. *sigh* I'd much rather spend what money I do have on gifts than on lighting up my house to impress the neighbors.

Every once in a while I will make a good point on frugality. For instance, my 14 y/o neice spent the night with my daughter a few nights ago. They were munching on my homemade left over pizza. This neice is all about looks and clothing, naturally. So I asked her to compare the cost of ordering pizza for her friends, at least $20, compared to making it from scratch, about $2. That left over $18 could buy a cute shirt. That sunk in. When you put it as cutting out money for one thing in order to get something that's more important that's when she perked up.

Maybe some people are too set in their ways when they're older, lol, maybe we need to get 'em while their young!

[schellie69]

My dh loves it when I save money, his best friend lives with us and he thinks it is really cool My kids are having fun with trying to figure out how much money we can save. We have a coin jar and the kids love watch the money get higher in the jar. I have been making more things from scratch the children love this. My extended family things it is crazy my mil doesn't want to discuss it, my fil thinks it is great. I have stopped carrying what people think and just do what I feel is right for my family I have noticed that when I have to make a big purchase appliance and such I buy the best for the money I will spend a little extra to get the highest quility the one that will last longer. saves money over the long run.

[i.m.cheap]

I don't have much extended family, really. My mom constantly criticizes every dime I spend, even though she has never been frugal. She actually walked away from me in JC Penney's on Black Friday because I decided to spend $16.99 on a gift for DH for Christmas. He had not gotten a Christmas or Birthday or Anniversary gift for years, but this year we decided to spend no more than $20 and buy each other one thing.

Mom also is constantly critical of our having a (reduced price) membership to the YMCA. We pay $35 a month, dd loves to swim, and we use this as our P.E. since we homeschool. Every time I say anything about the high price of gas (or whatever) my mother jumps in there with "Well if you didn't have to belong to the Y, you'd have plenty of money!" I think she is crazy. If we decide to go to the second run movie theater, (with a coupon, of course, and not buying anything from the concession stand, if costs less than $5 for the three of us to go to a movie, we do this about three times a year) my mother just starts ranting about how SHE never goes to a movie because SHE can not afford to throw money away. Oh, by the way, they go to Hawaii for two weeks EVERY YEAR. I find myself avoiding even talking to her about finances at all, because afterwards I feel like I have been beaten with a big stick.