How to teach frugality to preteens!

[lovestolaugh]

Okay, so I am trying to instill frugalness into my two preteens. Overall, they do very well with watching the cost of things when spending their own money. It's when they want to spend my money that they forget to watch for a good deal!!! So, I came up with a solution to this. Every season they both need new clothes. I have always just gone out and purchased what they needed but this year I decided to do it a bit differently! I told my kids that they would each be given a certain amount of $ that I deemed appropriate for their clothing needs. We would go through their closets together and decide what is needed. I will then take them shopping for their new clothes. They will each be allowed to keep whatever money they don't spend as long as they get everything on the list and it passes my (modesty) inspection. They seem real excited to do this. My daughter asked if she could get at least one pair of shorts and a shirt from Limited Too. I told her that as long as she gets everything on her list and she has enough money to shop at Limited Too then sure, she can! She got the funniest expression on her face and she said that she would just wait for their end of season sale and that their clothes weren't that cute!!!!!! I think she is finally getting it!!!!!!
Another little success story too! They both went to Gamestop and purchased used older games for $5 each. They are both thrilled with them and can't believe how cheap they were!!!! They are finally learning!!!!

Thanks for listening!

[latierra84]

I do something similar to this with my kid sister. She's only nine and gets $5 when we hit the thrift stores on the weekend. I am always surprised at how well she's able to make those five dollars S-T-R-E-T-C-H.

[Jskell911]

My son will do this if I give him a list and budget too. Sometimes I think that even if it is our $$, if we make it seem like they are responsible for HOW it's spent it feels more like theirs. And they are a bit more thoughtful.

[joyofsix]

I have found that making them save for what they want helps. Many times they don't want it badly enough to save b-day money and their allowance to buy it. I take them along to thrift shops and garage sales. They LOVE the free box, lol. For my 12yo, I have introduced him to used games, both at our local store and online at Amazon, etc. He really wanted a $50 game after Christmas (and had the money) but decided to wait and found the same game for $29 online so I think he's
getting it.

[momof42003]

I guess it would not be really teaching frugality, but savings...

My cousin (who is a mortgage broker), says that if you give your child an allowance, let them keep only HALF, and put the other half in a savings account. It is amazing how much they would save over a year-depending on how much they get for allowances... Just a thought. I am thinking of doing this with my kids.. He also suggested to do this with any moneys the kids might get. The earlier you start the easier it is for the kids to do. Just a thought.

[PrairieRose]

That's a great way to teach them. We would also tell our's that we'd spend xx.00 on shoes. If they wanted more expensive ones they had to come up with the money. At first they would and then later they didn't really care so much about the brand......

[rsbs]

Allright! WTG! I have trouble with this right now too.
DD wants all the things "all the other kids have" and on top of that, my stepdaughter (who does not live with us, but visits) is over-indulged at her mother's house.
DD is usually a pretty good kid & keeps finances in mind, but from time to time, she gets caught up in the "it's not fair!" mindset & we have to talk about priorities & the lessons she is learning by saving for what she wants.
I think I might give her a clothing "allowance" for back to school too! Good idea!

[lilyrose]

My DD is not a preteen. She's only 7. BUT, I am so proud of her that I just have to share.

1. She had received some money for her b-day. We determined a certain amount to go into the bank and the rest for spending like at garage sales. When she was going through the money for spending, she asked if she could put another $5 bill in the bank "for college".
2. We returned a couple clothes she received that didn't fit her. She is pretty good with numbers for her age, so we were walking around the store looking at clothes and prices. She knew how much she had for spending. Many of the clothes were more than she had. After looking at several clothes and their prices, her reaction to the prices was "I think I'm going to be sick".
3. There is a twice a year flea market near my house. DD and I went there during the last half hour. I commented that we could probably ask if people would take less, since it would be closing soon. She then proceeding to offer less for 'every' item she wanted to buy. Everyone thought she was so cute. She didn't always get the lesser amount she offered, but she did get it most of the time.

I hope she carries the value of money into her preteen years and for the rest of her life.

[JessieMom]

It is really amazing how kids think twice about their wants when you tell them they can have it but they have to use their money, lol.
I had to do something similiar with lunch money for my two boys. They eat everything in sight, lol and it was costing me a fortune for school lunches since they don't pack! I finally had it with them always telling me they needed lunch money & having to sit down to decide whether they really should need it or if they were obviously eating the "extras" again. So what we did was sit down with both boys, what I found out was both of them were eating not only lunch (with extra milk & sometimes goodies) but also breakfast half the time (which is ridiculous since they could & usually do eat breakfast at home). We figured out how much it would cost for them to eat lunch w/ extra milk every day and increased it by a little to give them the ability to either eat breakfast or have a little extra once in a while. I pay them every 2 weeks when I get paid. The deal is if they have extra it is theirs, if they run out - tough & they have to pack until I get paid again. Let me tell you, it is AMAZING how their habits have changed! My middle son (he's the giant at already 6 foot & wearing a size 14 shoe) was telling me the other day that he has figured out that it is cheaper for him to just buy a second lunch than it is for him to buy an extra milk & an extra side dish like he used to. Both have also decided that it would be better to just eat what I provide at home for breakfast than eat the outrageously priced limp breakfast sandwich at school (funny how when I was paying for the sandwich it was great but now that he has to fork over the money it suddenly isn't as appetizing:-)
I may try your idea with the clothing budget for my daughter - won't bother with the boys though because neither could care less if they have more than 1pr of pants & a shirt to wear. I took them clothes shopping for school last year & they stood there with a glazed look on their face saying "I don't care" to everything.
We also do the save half/spend half with any money the kids earn. They aren't overly excited about it but they like to look at what is sitting in the bank earning interest & it is amazing how early they grasp the idea of interest when it is their money sitting in the bank

[frugalwarrior]

I live in a rich area. My children have never been given to solve my guilt. I explain many of these children don't know their parents because they are always working. They are alone a lot to pay for this lifestyle. We buy at resale shops so I can stay home. Also I drove home volume. My kids have 10x the possible outfits. My daughter is taught each outfit piece must match 6 others. I showed her that by the end of the school season all their clothes look tired from over wear. Many of the girls buy her artistically revamped clothes and beg their parent s to take them to the resale shops. My kids know how much things cost at g.sales and won't pay retail. i had to admonish my daughter when she was younger from loudly stating "these prices are ridiculous, I can get that for a dollar at a garage sale." She was probably eight.lol